Mike Ditka, 1939-2026

The NFL Network has a series titled A Football Life. In 2023, they did an episode on Mike Ditka. But if anybody has lived "a football life," he did. By his own admission, "My life has been a miracle since, because of this game."

Michael Keller Dyczko Jr. was born on October 18, 1939, the same exact day as Lee Harvey Oswald. Suffice it to say that Ditka was more admired. He was born in Carnegie, Pennsylvania, southwest of Pittsburgh. His father sort-of anglicized the family name to Ditka.

He grew up in Aliquippa, northwest of Pittsburgh, just down the Ohio River from Joe Namath's hometown of Beaver Falls, and a short drive from Pittsburgh International Airport. At Aliquippa High School, he played football, basketball and baseball under head coach Peter "Press" Maravich, who is now best known as the father and coach of "Pistol Pete" Maravich. (Pete was 8 years younger than Ditka, and never a teammate.)

Other notable graduates of Aliquippa High include Press himself; later NFL stars Sean Gilbert, Ty Law and Darrelle Revis; baseball pitcher Joe Beggs; and composer Henry Mancini. Pro Football Hall-of-Famer Tony Dorsett, star linebacker Paul Posluszny, and pitcher/dentist George "Doc" Medich all lived in Aliquippa, but later moved to nearby Hopewell and attended high school there. Future baseball player John "Tito" Francona (father of Terry) lived in Aliquippa, but moved to nearby New Brighton.

A star at the University of Pittsburgh, which retired his uniform Number 89, Mike Ditka practically invented the position of tight end with the Chicago Bears, winning the NFL Rookie of the Year award in 1961, and helping them win the 1963 NFL Championship. In 1967, he was traded to the Philadelphia Eagles; in 1969, to the Dallas Cowboys. He helped them win Super Bowl VI, and caught a touchdown pass in the game.

Football players did not have mustaches in those days.

He retired after the 1972 season, with 427 receptions for 5,812 yards and 43 touchdowns. He was the 1st tight end elected to the Pro Football Hall of Fame. He was named to the NFL's 75th Anniversary Team in 1994, and its 100th Anniversary Team and the Bears' 100th Anniversary 100 Greatest Players in 2019. In 1999, even though he was, by then, an analyst for NBC, John Madden, then with Fox, named him to his "All-Madden All-Millennium Team."

When The Sporting News named its 100 Greatest Football Players in 1999, Ditka was ranked 90th. When the NFL Network named its 100 Greatest Players in 2010, Ditka rose to 59th.

Although he was only 33 years old when he retired, Cowboy head coach Tom Landry immediately named him assistant head coach and special teams coordinator. He helped the Cowboys reach 3 more Super Bowls, winning Super Bowl XII in 1978.

In 1982, Ditka became the last head coach hired by George Halas, the founder of the Bears and a co-founder of the NFL. Halas died during the next season. He got them into the Playoffs 7 times, including winning Super Bowl XX over the New England Patriots on January 26, 1986. In other words, the Bears haven't won a World Championship without Ditka having some part in it in 80 years.

That 1985 Bears team, pushed by the Chicago media and the various TV commercials their players did, became one of the most iconic teams in NFL history, even before they could fully cement themselves as one of the greatest teams in NFL history.

Walter Payton, tackle Jim "Jimbo" Covert, defensive ends Richard Dent and Dan Hampton, defensive tackle Steve McMichael and linebacker Mike Singletary have been elected to the Hall of Fame; center Jay Hilgenberg and safety Gary Fencik probably should be; and 320-pound defensive tackle turned trick-play running back William "the Refrigerator" Perry became a folk hero.

But, like the New York Mets team that won the World Series 9 months later, that edition of "The Monsters of the Midway" became "a dynasty of one." After that Super Bowl, the growing rift between Ditka and his defensive coordinator, James "Buddy" Ryan, meant that they couldn't both stay. Ryan was offered the head coach's job with the Philadelphia Eagles. Ditka kept the Bears in the Playoffs in 4 of the next 5 years, but only reached 1 more NFC Championship Game, and was let go after missing the Playoffs in 1992.

Ditka was hired as an analyst for NBC's NFL studio show, NFL Live. He played off his tough-guy-with-a-sense-of-humor image, boosted by his often contentious press conferences as Bears coach. He said things like, "A man without fear belongs in an asylum. Or on special teams." And, "If God wanted man to play soccer, he wouldn't have given us arms."

Also playing off this image was a Saturday Night Live sketch: "Bob Swerski's Super Fans," which imagined a sports-talk show in Chicago. George Wendt, best known as Norm Peterson on the Boston-based Cheers, was a Chicago native, and played Bob, the show's host, his name a takeoff on Chicago Bulls broadcaster Chuck Swirsky. He had 3 sidekicks on the show: Robert Smigel, the sketch's creator, a New Yorker who moved to Chicago to start his comedy career, played Carl Wollarski; Mike Myers, a Toronto native, played Pat Arnold; and Chris Farley, ironically a Wisconsin native and a fan of the Bears' arch-rivals, the Green Bay Packers, played Todd O'Connor.

Left to right: Farley, Smigel, Myers and Wendt

The radio show was said to be broadcast live from the original Mike Ditka's Steakhouse (since closed, at the Tremont Hotel at 100 East Chestnut Street on the Near North Side). They all adopted Ditka's look: Slicked-back hair, aviator sunglasses, big bushy mustaches, and a Bears sweater. Wendt smoked a cigar like Ditka tended to do.

They would brag about the accomplishments of their favorite football and basketball teams, making ridiculous predictions (Todd always predicting shutouts, while Pat once said Ditka would "find a way" to hold an opponent to minus-7 points), exaggerating their accents with stretched-out vowels and S's: "Da Bearssss!" "Da Bullssss!" which would be accompanied by raising their beer mugs in a toast.

They never mentioned hockey's Blackhawks, and only once did I hear them mention either of the city's baseball teams: "Da Cubs!" Never the White Sox as "Da Sox!" They talked smack, they drank beer, they ate Polish sausages, and, in a running gag that now seems cringey, especially in light of Farley's death from a drug-induced heart attack, Farley's Todd would have a heart attack, but quickly recover. The sketch ran 11 times from 1991 to 1997, before Farley's death at the end of that year.

In 1997, Ditka left NBC to become the head coach of the New Orleans Saints. In 1999, he traded all their draft picks, and their 1st round pick for the next season, to the Washington Redskins for their 1st round pick, which was used on Heisman Trophy-winning running back Ricky Williams. It turned out to be a bad match, and Ditka had the worst season of his coaching career -- and, as it turned out, the last.

He joined CBS in 2000, and ESPN in 2002, remaining with them through the 2015 season. After a long estrangement, the Bears finally retired his Number 89 in 2013.

When the Bears won the Super Bowl in 1986, the space shuttle Challenger blew up 2 days later, and their scheduled White House reception with President Ronald Reagan was canceled. In 2011, 25 years later, President and Chicago resident Barack Obama invited the team to the White House to make it up to them.

Despite Ditka and several of the players being very conservative -- Ditka later openly supported Donald Trump, and was even approached to run against Obama for the U.S. Senate seat in Illinois in 2004, but thought a loss would hurt his restaurant chain, and chose not to -- he gave Obama the traditional gift, a team jersey with the President's name on the back. Sometimes, the number on the jersey is 1, sometimes it's the President's sequential number (in Obama's case, 44); this time, it was the year of the title, 85.

Ditka, Tom Flores, Tony Dungy and Doug Pederson are the only 4 men to win a Super Bowl as a player and as a head coach. Dikta and Flores are the only 2 to also win one as an assistant coach. Steve Owen, Ray Flaherty, Joe Stydahar and Buddy Parker also won NFL Championships in the pre-Super Bowl era as non-coaching players, and also won a title as non-playing head coaches. Halas, Elgie Tobin, Guy Chamberlin, Jimmy Conzelman and Curly Lambeau won early titles as player-coaches.

Ditka was married to his first wife, Marge, from 1961 to 1973. They had 4 children together, each, like them, having a name starting with an M: Sons Mike III, Matt and Mark; and daughter Megan. In 1977, Mike married Diane Trantham. They eventually moved to Naples, Florida, for Mike's health, as he'd had heart attacks and strokes, and had gotten each hip replaced twice. But they missed Chicago, and returned to the city's Gold Coast.

At his number retirement, December 9, 2013

Mike Ditka died today, October 9, 2026, in Chicago, 9 days before what would have been his 87th birthday. His family asked for the announcement to be made by a Chicago sports-talk radio show host: Jarrett Payton, son of his favorite player, Walter Payton, who passed away in 1999. (I've already seen 2 AI-generated images of Payton walking Ditka into Heaven.)

In watching ESPN's coverage of his death, one phrase came to my mind: "Mike Ditka was one of a kind." And both ESPN football analyst Chris Berman and Cleveland Browns coach Todd Monken also said, on the air, that he was one of a kind. So, yeah, it seems obvious.

Also on ESPN, on Pardon the Interruption, Chicago native co-host and Bears fan Michael Wilbon pointed out the man's iconic status: "To those of us who cared about the Bears. Ditka was everything we believed in, everything Chicago believed in. Decades later, people don't go to NFL games dressed like Parcells, or Walsh, or Shula! They come dressed like Mike Ditka! Iron Mike! Da Coach! Our world is so much less interesting without him."

He's right. People go to Raiders games dressed like biker gang members or Darth Vader. People go to Washington games with pig masks, or at least rubber snouts, in remembrance of the 1980s "Hogs." But in Chicago, they still show up in shades and fake mustaches in tribute to "Da Coach."

Da Tribute

With his death, there are 4 surviving players from the 1963 NFL Champion Chicago Bears: Defensive back Richie Petitbon, defensive end Ed O'Bradovich, running back Ronnie Bull and offensive lineman Bob Wetoska.

October 11, 1975: "Saturday Night Live" Premieres

Back row, left to right: Laraine Newman, John Belushi,

Jane Curtin, Chevy Chase and Dan Aykroyd.

Bottom row, left to right: Garrett Morris and Gilda Radner.

October 11, 1975, 50 years ago: Saturday Night premieres on NBC, taping from the network's studios at 30 Rockefeller Plaza in Midtown Manhattan. After this 1st season, it will be renamed Saturday Night Live. The original cast, known as "the Not Ready for Prime Time Players," includes John Belushi, Dan Aykroyd, Gilda Radner, Chevy Chase, Jane Curtin, Laraine Newman and Garrett Morris -- but not, as is commonly believed, Bill Murray, who replaced Chase after 1 season.

The 1st guest host is George Carlin, who begins his monologue with a whacked-out version of the Lord's Prayer, and goes on to do "Baseball and Football," a routine he will expand on a few times. (This version is from 1990, from the State Theatre in New Brunswick, New Jersey.)

Not long before Carlin died, someone took a poll to determine the greatest standup comedians of all time. Carlin came in 2nd. Coming in 1st was Richard Pryor, who, like Carlin, was at the peak of his powers in the mid-Seventies.

A month into SNL's run, Pryor was asked to host the show. But, nervous that he would issue some four-letter words — they didn't seem as nervous about such language coming from Carlin, creator of the 1972 bit "Seven Words You Can Never Use On Television," none of which he used when he hosted -- the show was not quite "Live, from New York." They used a 7-second delay, in case they had to bleep anything out. They did. Ever since, even SNL hasn't been totally live.

In addition to the preceding, SNL would make stars of Eddie Murphy, Joe Piscopo, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Christopher Guest, Harry Shearer, Dana Carvey, Phil Hartman, Norm McDonald, Mike Myers, Chris Farley, Sarah Silverman, Will Ferrell, Tina Fey, Keenan Thompson, and Kate McKinnon.

Billy Crystal was already a star when he signed on for the 1984-85 season. The next season would be the one and only on the show for Robert Downey Jr., whose true fame was yet to come.

October 1975: Some Kind of a Month

October 1, 1975, 50 years ago: Heavyweight Champion Muhammad Ali fights former Heavyweight Champion Joe Frazier for the 3rd time, at the Araneta Coliseum in Quezon City, the capital of the Philippines. Quezon City is the national capital, and the arena is located about 5 miles east of the country's largest city, Manila.

It becomes known as "The Thrilla in Manila." Frazier said he hit Ali with punches that would have brought down buildings. Ali said he had never come so close to death. In the 13th round, an Ali punch sent Frazier's mouth-guard flying. The 14th round was even more brutal. Frazier's corner wouldn't let him go out for the 15th and final round. The fight was declared over. Ali raised his arm in triumph, and then collapsed.

Both men should have retired after that fight. Howard Cosell, who broadcast it for ABC, said, "A big part of Ali remained inside that ring."

That same day, in Memphis, a man broke into the home of Al Jackson Jr., the drummer for Booker T. & The M.G.'s, looking to burglarize it. Jackson confronts him, and is shot and killed. He was only 39 years old.

It was some kind of a fight. It began some kind of a month.

*

October 2: Chevrolet introduces its "subcompact" car, the Chevette. And W.T. Grant department stores files for bankruptcy. They had a store in my hometown of East Brunswick, New Jersey. Oddly enough, the space was bought by a theater chain named Grant's, so they kept the sign over the front door. The new theater was named Movie City Five, and I worked there in 1988.

October 3: A siege ends at the Spaghetti House restaurant in Knightsbridge, London. Franklin Davies, a Nigerian student, led 2 other gunmen in an attempted armed robbery of the restaurant, where managers of the chain had assembled to pay in the week's takings of approximately £13,000. When the armed robbery did not go to plan, 9 Italian staff members were taken hostage, and moved into the basement. Another staff member escaped and raised the alarm, leading to a siege of 6 days.

The robbers and their captives emerged unharmed. As with the recent film Dog Day Afternoon, about a 1972 Brooklyn robbery, a film was made about it, Spaghetti House.

October 5: The Svenska Hockeyligan begins play in Sweden. And actresses Kate Winslet and Parminder Nagra are born.

October 6: For the 1st time, major U.S. TV networks declined a request to interrupt programming to broadcast a speech by the President. The nationwide address by Gerald Ford is carried only by ABC, not by NBC, CBS or PBS.

Four days earlier, Ford had vetoed  an extension of the federal school lunch and nutrition program, On October 7, both houses of Congress overwhelmingly voted to override that veto, 397-18 in the House and 79-13 in the Senate, and make it law.

With the combination of inflation and recession, known as "stagflation," and the lingering anger over his pardon the year before of his predecessor, Richard Nixon, Ford is very unpopular, including among many of his fellow Republicans, who believe he is not conservative enough. And he has to face election for a term of his own in 13 months, with Primaries starting in 4 months.

October 7: Former Beatle John Lennon gets his deportation order overruled in federal court. He can now stay in America for as long as he wants. Sean Ono Lennon, his son with Yoko Ono, is born 2 days later.

Both of Major League Baseball's Pennants are decided. The Boston Red Sox beat the Oakland Athletics, 5-3 at the Oakland Coliseum, completing a 3-game sweep of the American League Championship Series, and ending a 3-year Pennant streak for the A's. Team owner Charlie Finley was too cheap to live up to his contract with pitcher Jim "Catfish" Hunter, and lost him to free agency. But with the Sox sweeping the series, it's hard to say that Hunter would have made much of a difference.

The A's had still won 5 straight titles in the AL Western Division. But before the next regular season began, Finley would trade his best player, Reggie Jackson, and the breakup of his dynasty was on.

And the Cincinnati Reds completed a sweep in the National League Championship Series, beating the Pittsburgh Pirates, 5-3 in 10 innings. It is the Reds' 3rd Pennant in 6 seasons, but they haven't won a World Series in 35 years. They will face the Red Sox, who haven't won one in 57 years. Something's got to give.

October 8: Kim Dae-doo, with 17 kills South Korea's all-time leading serial killer, is arrested. Doug Jarvis makes his NHL debut with the Montreal Canadiens, and eventually plays in 964 consecutive games, setting a record (since broken). And President Ford signs a bill allowing women into the U.S. military service academies: The Army at West Point, New York; the Naval Academy (which also trains officers for the Marine Corps) at Annapolis, Maryland; the Air Force at Colorado Springs, Colorado; and the Coast Guard at Kings Point, New York.

October 10: For the 2nd time, actors Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton marry. It lasts for 9 months. It was the 6th of 8 marriages for Liz, the 3rd of 5 for Dick.

*

October 11: Bill Clinton marries Hillary Rodham in Little Rock, the capital of Arkansas. A little more than a year later, Bill was elected to office for the first time, as Attorney General of the State. Despite everything, not only are the Clintons still together, but, unlike many of their detractors, they are each still on their 1st marriage.

That afternoon, Game 1 of the World Series is played at Fenway Park in Boston. With the game scoreless in the bottom of the 7th inning, Red Sox pitcher Luis Tiant -- who, due to the designated hitter, had only come to bat once all season -- got a hit, and ended up scoring the 1st of 6 runs in the inning. He finished the game with a 5-hit shutout. The Red Sox won, 6-0, and took a surprising lead in the series.

That night, NBC premieres a new late night variety program, titled Saturday Night. The title made sense, as NBC already had shows titled Today, Tonight and Tomorrow.

Lorne Michaels created, produced and directed it. The original cast, known as "The Not Ready for Prime Time Players," were John Belushi, Dan Aykroyd, Chevy Chase, Garrett Morris, Michael O'Donoghue, Golden Radner, Jane Curtin and Laraine Newman.

The 1st guest host was George Carlin. In spite of the late hour (11:30 PM), he did not do his routine "Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television." He did, however, open with a parody of The Lord's Prayer": "Our Father, whose art is in Heaven, hollow be thy name." He also did his routine comparing "Baseball and Football." The 1st musical guest was Billy Preston.

At the end of the 1st season, when a similarly titled show, on ABC, hosted by, of all people, Howard Cosell, is canceled, the NBC show adopts the BBC show's name: Saturday Night Live. Chase left, replaced by Bill Murray.

*

October 12: The Reds bounce back, winning Game 2, 3-2, with Dave Concepción and Ken Griffey Sr. each driving in a run in the top of the 9th, tying the series.

And Marion Jones is born. She went on to star on the women's basketball team at the University of North Carolina, winning the 1994 National Championship. At the 2000 Olympics in Sydney, she won 3 Gold Medals and 2 Bronze Medals as a sprinter, but was disqualified from each for using performance-enhancing drugs. In 2010, at the age of 36, she made a comeback of sorts, playing the 1st of 2 seasons with the WNBA's Tulsa Shock.

October 13: Charles "Swede" Risberg, the last survivor of the 8 Chicago White Sox players who "threw" the 1919 World Series, died. And the U.S. Mint released the Bicentennial Dollar coin, replacing the image of the Apollo 11 logo, the eagle landing on the Moon, with an image of the Liberty Bell superimposed over the entire Moon.

The Bicentennial Half-Dollar had already been released, with Independence Hall in Philadelphia replacing the Great Seal of the United States. So had the Bicentennial Quarter, with a Revolutionary War drummer boy replacing the eagle. Aside from a date of "1776-1976," no changes were made to the front: Dwight D. Eisenhower would be on the dollar, as he had since 1971 and would be until 1978; John F. Kennedy would be on the half-dollar, as he had since 1964; and George Washington would be on the quarter, as he had since 1962.

October 14: The World Series moved to Cincinnati for Games 3, 4 and 5. Game 3 went to a 10th inning, marked by a controversial play involving Cincinnati's Ed Armbrister and Boston's Carlton Fisk: Armbrister, a backup outfielder, lays down a sacrifice bunt, and seemingly hesitates breaking out of the batter's box; Fisk's subsequent throwing error leads to the Reds' winning run. The Sox scream for an interference call from umpire Larry Barnett‚ but to no avail.

The Reds hang on to win, 6-5. Tony Kubek, former Yankee shortstop and now one of the NBC broadcasters, says on the air that Barnett blew the call. Barnett ends up getting thousands of angry letters, some of them death threats, nearly all of them from the New England States. Had instant replay been in effect at the time, there would not have been enough evidence of intentional interference to overturn the call.

October 15: The Red Sox win Game 4, 5-4. They score all 5 runs in the 4th inning, giving Tiant his 2nd win of the series. And Elgin Baylor Lumpkin, named for a basketball legend, is born. He grew up to become the rapper Ginuwine.

October 16: Game 5 is the only game of the Series that ends up not being close. The Red win, 6-2, thanks to 2 home runs by Tony Pérez.

Game 6 is supposed to be played in Boston on October 18. But it starts raining in New England. And it rains, and rains, and rains...

It is not a good time for sports' "rebel leagues." As it turns out, the American Basketball Association is in its last season, and 4 of its teams will be absorbed into the NBA within a year. The Baltimore Claws will not be one of them. On this day, they play an exhibition game, losing to the Norfolk-based Virginia Squires. Only 500 people come out to the Baltimore Civic Center (now the CFG Bank Arena). Three days later, unable to make their rent, never mind their payroll, they fold without playing a regular-season game.

The Utah Stars would not be one of the absorbed teams, either: On October 18, they beat the NBA's Milwaukee Bucks in an exhibition game at the Salt Palace in Salt Lake City, but they ended up folding in December.

The World Hockey Association is not doing well, either. But they're doing better than the World Football League, which plays its last games on:

October 19: The Birmingham Vulcans, winners of the previous season's title under the Birmingham Americans name, beat the Memphis Southmen, 21-0 at Legion Field in Birmingham. The Shreveport Steamer (no S on the end) beat the San Antonio Wings, 41-31 at Independence Stadium in Shreveport. The Portland Thunder beat the Jacksonville Express, 30-13 at Civic Stadium (now Providence Park) in Portland. And in the very last game, the Southern California Sun beat The Hawaiians, 26-7 at Anaheim Stadium (now Angel Stadium of Anaheim).

On October 21, the WFL folded. And it wasn't the biggest sports story of the day. The WFL couldn't even die with dignity.

October 20: Two subway trains collide in Mexico City, killing 43 people. It's the worst accident in the history of the Mexico City Metro, and it remains the worst urban transit accident in North America since the Malbone Street Wreck in Brooklyn in 1918.

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October 21: Tom Waits releases his album Nighthawks at the Diner, including the song "Eggs and Sausage." In that song, he sings, "Baby, you gotta understand, I'm in a graveyard charade, a spaceship masquerade." Good metaphors for the 1970s.

Finally, the rain lets up, for what Boston Globe columnist Dan Shaughnessy called "a brilliant autumn day in New England." That night, Game 6 of the World Series could finally be played at Fenway Park.

The delay gives Luis Tiant enough rest to start for the 3rd time. Sox fans loved him for his effective pitching and his twisty windup. He loved himself just as much: He would stand in the shower, smoking a cigar, looking at himself in a mirror, seeing his bald head and huge mustache, and saying, in heavily-accented English, "Damn, I am a gooood-looooking son of a biiiitch!"

He looked good for 4 innings, pitching a shutout and benefiting from a 3-run home run by Fred Lynn, who went on to become the 1st player ever to win either League's Rookie of the Year and its Most Valuable Player award in the same season. But he faltered in the 7th, and the Reds took a 3-0 lead in the top of the 8th. In the bottom of the 8th, Bernie Carbo, whom the Reds had traded away, hit a drive to straightaway center field, for a 3-run homer, tying the game, 6-6.

The game went to extra innings. Leading off the top of the 11th, the Reds' Pete Rose said to Red Sox catcher Carlton Fisk, "Some kind of a game, isn't it?" It wasn't just some kind of a game: It was some kind of a month.

Fisk led off the bottom of the 12th. At 12:34 AM on October 22, he hit a drive off Pat Darcy, down the right-field line, that looked like it might go foul. As though it would actually influence the flight of the ball, Fisk waved his arms to his right. The ball hit the pole near its top, for a home run. Final score, Boston 7, Cincinnati 6. The Series was tied, and would go to a Game 7.

John Kiley, the organist at Fenway Park (and also at the Boston Garden, thus the answer to the corny old trivia question about "the only man to play for the Red Sox, Celtics and Bruins"), played George Friedrich Handel's "Hallelujah Chorus." Then he played "Stout-Hearted Men." Then he played "The Beer Barrel Polka." ("Roll out the barrel, we'll have a barrel of fun.") Then he played "Seventy-six Trombones" from the Broadway musical The Music Man. (I have no idea why he played that one.)

The shot of Fisk thinking he can wave the ball fair, which I've dubbed the Fenway Twist, is the most familiar clip in the history of televised sports. (As they had with every World Series since 1947, NBC was televising it, although they would begin to alternate with ABC starting with the 1977 season, until 1989.)

October 22: Sir Hugh Fraser, a member Britain’s Parliament; his wife, historian Lady Antonia Fraser; and Caroline Kennedy, the 17-year-old daughter of the late President John F. Kennedy, who was visiting them at their Holland Park home, in Kensington, West London, are almost blown up by a car bomb, placed under the wheels of his Jaguar by the Irish Republican Army. It had been triggered to go off at 9:00 AM, when he left the house.

Almost certainly, Sir Hugh was the target. The bomber was unlikely to have blown up the daughter of America’s only Irish-Catholic President if he’d known she would be there.

The bomb exploded, killing a noted cancer researcher, Gordon Hamilton-Fairley. A neighbour of the Frasers, he had been walking his dog, when he noticed something amiss and stopped to examine the bomb.

Sir Hugh and Lady Antonia split up 2 years later. She later married playwright Harold Pinter.

Historian Arnold Toynbee dies. Modern Family actor Jesse Tyler Ferguson and Spanish soccer star Míchel Salgado are born. Venera 9, a Soviet space probe, lands on the planet Venus, and sends to Earth the 1st photographs of the surface of another planet.

And Game 7 of the 1975 World Series is played at Fenway Park. Reds manager George "Sparky" Anderson started Don Gullett, and said, "No matter who wins, my starting pitcher is going to the Hall of Fame." Red Sox manager Darrell Johnson started Bill Lee, who, asked about Anderson's statement, said, "No matter who wins, I'm going to the Eliot Lounge." That was a famous Boston bar, since gone out of business. Gullett would be kept out of the Hall of Fame by shoulder woes.

He was kept from being the winning pitcher in this game by allowing 3 runs in the bottom of the 3rd inning, including an RBI single by Carl Yastrzemski and back-to-back bases-loaded walks to Rico Petrocelli and Dwight Evans.

Lee kept his shutout through 5 innings. He allowed a single to Rose to lead off the top of the 6th, then got 2 outs. Then he made the biggest mistake in Red Sox history. He had been experimenting with a blooper pitch, and had used it with some success in this game. This time, he threw it to Tony Pérez, who knocked it far over the Green Monster, Fenway's left field wall, 37 feet high and 315 feet from home plate. (Or so it was labeled at the time. It was eventually relabeled 310, and some people believe it's even closer than that.) Cincinnati 3, Boston 2.

The Reds tied the game in the 7th. Cliché Alert: Walks can kill you, especially the leadoff variety. Jim Burton walked Griffey to start the top of the 9th. César Gerónimo bunted him over to 2nd base. One out, but now, the run that would win the World Series was in scoring position. Dan Driessen grounded out. Two out, but now, the run that would win the World Series was in scoring position. Burton walked Rose to keep the inning alive. Joe Morgan was up, and he blooped a single into short center field, scoring Griffey. In the bottom of the 9th, Will McEnaney got Juan Beníquez to fly to right, Bob Montgomery to ground to short, and Yastrzemski to fly to center.

Cincinnati 4, Boston 3, both in this game and in the World Series. Not only has Game 6 been called baseball's "Greatest Game Ever Played," but the Series has been called the best World Series ever. At any rate, the Big Red Machine had their title, and their validation. The Red Sox, and all of New England, would have to wait.

*

October 25: In England's Football League, West Ham United, of the East End of London, hosted Manchester United, beating them, 2-1. A fight between 2 of the biggest hooligan "firms" in England, West Ham's Inter-City Firm (ICF) and Man U's Cockney Reds, based in London but fans of Man U due to their television exposure during the 1960s, led to 102 people being injured, and 38 arrested. England's hooligan problem would get worse before it got better.

And in Los Angeles, Elton John -- by this point, a part-owner of his hometown soccer team, Watford Football Club in Hertfordshire -- plays the 1st of 2 sold-out concerts at Dodger Stadium. He wears a sequined Dodger uniform, with "ELTON" and the Number 1 on the back, designed by CBS costume wizard Bob Mackie.

October 27: Rex Stout, creator of the fictional private detective Nero Wolfe, dies. And, for the 1st time, the weekly news magazines Time and Newsweek put the same person on their covers. It's not a major figure in domestic or international politics, or a renowned scientist, or a beloved humanitarian. It's a rock and roll star: Bruce Springsteen, riding the success of his album Born to Run.

October 28: Georges Carpentier dies. He had been a hero in World War I, and the Light Heavyweight Champion of the World. In 1921, he fought Heavyweight Champion Jack Dempsey at a temporary stadium called Boyle's Thirty Acres in Jersey City, New Jersey, for the heavyweight title, and it became boxing's 1st gate of over $1 million. Dempsey won by knockout.

That same day, having been admitted the day before, I underwent surgery at the Hospital for Joint Diseases, then located at 1919 Madison Avenue, at 123rd Street, in Manhattan's Spanish Harlem, to correct a problem in my legs that made walking difficult.

My 2 weeks in that hospital were a blur, as I was almost 6 years old. What I do remember from the experience, I wouldn't wish on anyone. I've been a hospital patient on Halloween Night at age 5, and I've been a hospital patient on Thanksgiving Day at age 17. Halloween at 5 in a hospital is worse.

A follow-up surgery was performed on July 12, 1976. This time, I left the hospital after 1 week. Both times, it was in a wheelchair.

As with the previous one, the surgery was successful, to an extent. But the problem, caused by a birth defect, wouldn't go away. I still developed arthritis, and the pain in my legs frequently made walking a chore. I told myself that, one day, I would walk out of that hospital. I was walking within a few weeks.

In 1979, Joint Diseases moved into a new building, at 301 East 17th Street, off 2nd Avenue, as part of New York University's Langone Orthopedic Hospital. In 2006, it was fully absorbed into the NYU Langone system. Its old building is now an apartment building, with the ground floor occupied by another health care facility, the Ralph Lauren Cancer Center. Finally, in 2018, I walked into their new building, and, symbolically, walked out of it. In 2019, I went back up to their old one, and did the same.

It was something I had to do, and, finally, I did it. It was, both figuratively and literally, a moving experience.

In 2020, I had my right hip replaced; in 2021, the left. So much pain was gone.

But I have no memory of what was going on in the outside world during those 2 weeks, which was plenty -- including in the City around me.

Also on October 28, President Ford convinced Vice President Nelson Rockefeller to drop out of a place on the Republican Party's 1976 ticket. The conservative wing of the Party had never trusted him. Ford ended up choosing Senator Bob Dole of Kansas.

October 29: Ford tells the National Press Club that he would veto any legislation for a federal bailout of New York City, which was in desperate financial straits.

In rebuilding mode, hockey's New York Rangers put their popular goaltender, Eddie Giacomin, on waivers. On October 31, he was claimed by the Detroit Red Wings. According to legend, the Rangers' next game was against those very Red Wings. It's not true: On November 1, they played the Canadiens in Montreal, and lost, 4-0. But the next game, their 1st home game after the waiver claim, on November 2, was at The Garden against the Wings, and Davidson and Giacomin were the opposing starting goalies.

All game long, Ranger fans chanted, "Ed-DIE! Ed-DIE! Ed-DIE!" They cheered when he made a save. They cheered when the Wings scored. They booed when their own players scored. The Wings won, 6-4, and the Ranger fans gave Giacomin a standing ovation.

On November 7, the Rangers traded beloved veterans Jean Ratelle and Brad Park to the hated Boston Bruins for Phil Esposito and Carol Vadnais. Both teams' fans hated "The Trade."

October 30: The New York Daily News, responding to Ford's statement that he wouldn't allow the federal government to bail out New York City's desperate finances, prints the most famous newspaper headline ever: "FORD TO CITY: DROP DEAD." Ford didn't actually say that, but that was the message he sent, intentionally or otherwise.

Both sides compromised, as the City did a few more things to try to get its financial house in order, and this satisfied Ford to the point where he changed his mind and signed a bailout bill.

But Ford was damned when he did, and damned when he didn't. The bailout he actually did sign infuriated many conservatives, who already had a few problems with the mildly conservative Ford, and they voted for former Governor Ronald Reagan of California in the Republican primaries, and Reagan very nearly won the GOP nomination, and when Ford won the nomination anyway, many of those conservatives stayed home on Election Day, November 2, 1976.

This may have made the difference in throwing some States, including New York, to the Democratic nominee, former Governor Jimmy Carter of Georgia. White conservatives in Queens, Brooklyn, Staten Island, Long Island and Westchester abandoned him. Not that they voted for Carter (Southern or not, conservative by Democratic standards or not, they still viewed all Democrats as "socialists"), but they didn't vote at all.

It also upset undecided voters and disaffected Democrats. A lot of people remembered only the headline, and forgot that Ford changed his mind about the bailout, and held it against him, and a lot of people in the City who might not have been comfortable with Carter either voted for Carter or stayed home, enough to throw the State of New York to Carter. It may have made, literally, all the difference in the world. Had Ford simply won the State, he would have won a full term.

True, the Nixon pardon, lingering feelings over Watergate, the shaky economy, his debate gaffe about Eastern Europe, and conservatives issues with him over things like foreign policy and federal spending also hurt him.

Also on this day, Wilma McCann was murdered in Leeds, England. She would later be determined to be the 1st victim of Peter Sutcliffe, arrested as the "Yorkshire Ripper" in 1981. He would be convicted of 13 murders.

Martha Moxley was murdered the same day, in Greenwich, Connecticut. She was 15 years old, as was Michael Skakel, who was accused of the murder. He was a nephew of Ethel Kennedy, widow of Robert F. Kennedy. It took 24 years for him to be indicted for it. He was finally convicted in 2002. He was released in 2013 and received an order for a new trial. He was convicted again in 2016, but remained free upon appeal. In 2018, the Connecticut Supreme Court vacated his conviction. As of October 1, 2025, he is out of prison, and still professes his innocence.

October 31: The British rock band Queen release their single "Bohemian Rhapsody," from their album A Night at the Opera. It was entirely written by lead singer Freddie Mercury, produced by Roy Thomas Baker, and recorded at Rockfield Studios 1 at Rockfield, Monmouth, Wales, about 37 miles northeast of the Welsh capital of Cardiff, and 154 miles west of London.

The 1970s were Schrödinger's Decade. There was too much Republican competence, too much oil, too much crimefighting, too much television, too much overwrought music, disco and otherwise; and, overall, too many ridiculous distractions from it all... and, at the same time, not enough of those things.

October 1975 was some kind of a month.

November wouldn't get any less strange. On the 5th, The Sex Pistols gave their 1st concert, in London. On the 7th, The New Original Wonder Woman, starring Lynda Carter, premiered on ABC. On the 10th, the SS Edmund Fitzgerald sank in Lake Superior, taking all 29 hands with them.

On the 11th, Australia's Governor-General, without getting permission from the head of state he represented, Queen Elizabeth II, fired the Prime Minister, Edward Gough Whitlam over a budget bill. And Portugal grants independence to the African land of Angola, which immediately breaks out into a civil war that lasts for 27 years.

On the 20th, Francisco Franco, Fascist dictator of Spain for 36 years, died. As Chevy Chase said on Saturday Night (Live) every week, "Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead!" Spain moved toward democracy, and, while it has since elected conservative governments, it has never again had a Fascist government.

March 12, 1983: Buckwheat Is Assassinated on "Saturday Night Live"

March 12, 1983, 40 years ago: Buckwheat is assassinated on Saturday Night Live. This was a big deal at the time.

Eddie Murphy had been playing a grownup version of Buckwheat, the black kid with the speech impediment and the upswept hair in the Our Gang serials from 1938 to 1944, on the show. His use of "O-tay!" instead of "Okay!" briefly became a popular catchphrase.

The actor who played Buckwheat, William Thomas Jr., billed as "Billie Thomas," later served in the U.S. Army, was decorated for his service, and returned to the film industry as an editor. On July 31, 1980, he was one of several former Our Gang (rebranded as The Little Rascals for later broadcasts on television) members honored at a convention in Los Angeles. But just a few weeks later, on October 10, he died of a heart attack. He was only 49 years old.

It was only after Thomas' death that Murphy began playing the character. What Thomas would have thought can only be speculated. His son, also named William Thomas Jr., became the executor of his father's estate and image, and raised no objection. But former co-star George "Spanky" McFarland hated it. Murphy got tired of it, too, and decided to "kill the character off." SNL executive producer Dick Ebersol agreed.

Despite being at night, instead of in daylight, the scene was staged to resemble the attempted assassination of President Ronald Reagan by John Hinckley 2 years earlier: Murphy, in character as Buckwheat, walks out of 30 Rockefeller Plaza, which includes NBC headquarters and the studio where SNL is taped, and waves to a crowd, saying "I wub noo!" (Meaning, "I love you!")

Then, as Buckwheat approaches his limousine, just as Hinckley shouted out, "Mr. President!" a voice is heard yelling, "Hey, Mr. Wheat!" Buckwheat turns, with his hands still up, and says, "Yes?" And he is shot. A bodyguard shoves him into the limo, which speeds off toward a hospital, while several people jump on the shooter.

SNL shot two versions, one with "blood squibs" and one without. They decided to go with the one without the squibs, because the one with the squibs looked too real, and they didn't want to actually scare anyone.

Castmember Joe Piscopo, known for his impersonation of Frank Sinatra, played ABC News Nightline host Ted Koppel, reporting on the story, and playing it absolutely straight, as if this was a real story happening in real time. He showed the shooting over and over, including in slow motion, as had been done with Reagan's shooting. Finally, he made the tragic announcement: "We have just received word: Buckwheat is dead!" Again and again, in slow motion, the shooting was repeated, and the audience got the joke.

As the character was taken in for emergency surgery, Mary Gross came on to play Alfalfa, another of the Our Gang characters. "His" reaction was, "I'm alarmed, and confused, and I don't know what to say." Ironically, the actual actor who played Alfalfa, Carl Switzer, was murdered, at his home in Los Angeles, on January 21, 1959. He was only 31.

Later, during the show's regular Saturday Night News segment -- it had originally been, and would again, be Weekend Update -- anchor Brad Hall (now better known for being the husband of Julia Louis-Dreyfus, also then an SNL castmember -- did the show as if it was a complete story, and posted reactions from famous people, who were obviously talking about someone else:

* Actor Charlton Heston, by then also known for his gun advocacy: "Well, he was one of the best we had, maybe the best America had had in this century." (He may have been talking about actor Henry Fonda, who died 7 months earlier.)

* Former Secretary of State Henry Kissinger: "He was tough. He had a good sense of humor." (He may have been talking about Soviet dictator Leonid Brezhnev, who died 4 months earlier; or Egyptian President Anwar Sadat, assassinated in late 1981.)

* President Reagan: "Nancy and I feel that we have lost a close and dear friend." (He could also have been talking about Fonda, or Sadat. In spite of their respective positions, he never met Brezhnev.)

* Pope John Paul II (graphics on the screen suggesting a translation from the original Italian -- yes, I know he was Polish, but he was speaking to Italians): "The entire world mourns the loss of this great humanitarian. Buckwheat was a man of peace. We all know how he died. But, perhaps some of you haven't seen the videotape. Let's take a look." (That made the live audience at 30 Rockefeller Plaza crack up.)

And every minute or so, they squeezed in a "commercial": "Buckwheat shot. America stunned. Brought to you by Texxon. Life goes on, and Texxon is there." "Emergency surgery. The world waits. Brought to you by Texxon. Life goes on, and Texxon is there." "Buckwheat dead. America mourns. Brought to you by Texxon. Life goes on, and Texxon is there." Finally, they closed the sketch with, "Buckwheat dead. America mourns. Brought to you by Texxon. Life goes on, and Texxon is there. Because Buckwheat would have wanted it that way."

The following week, Buckwheat's funeral was shown, again with Piscopo as Koppel covering it. It parodied Brezhnev's funeral, with soldiers doing a slow goose-step. But it also showed American soldiers firing a cannon in salute, probably taken from Reagan's Inauguration in 1981.

Among the simulated guests were First Lady Nancy Reagan, but not the President; and Diana, Princess of Wales, but not her husband, Prince Charles, or his mother, Queen Elizabeth II. Also, in footage clearly taken from Sadat's funeral: Former Presidents Richard Nixon, Gerald Ford and Jimmy Carter; plus Kissinger, and Prime Minister Menachem Begin of Israel.

They also showed footage of the candlelight vigil held in Central Park for former Beatle John Lennon after his assassination, in 1980, saying that this was for Buckwheat. (The entire Our Gang cast combined didn't have the impact that Lennon had.)

Piscopo/Koppel then announced that the police had identified the assassin. Like John Wilkes Booth, Lee Harvey Oswald, and Lennon's killer Mark David Chapman, he was always identified with all three names: John David Stutts. Murphy did double duty as victim and assassin.

As police led Stutts into court for his arraignment, a reporter asked him why he did it. Parodying David Berkowitz, the 1976-77 serial killer known as the Son of Sam, "Well, I had to kill him, because my dog told me he was the Antichrist."

Koppel introduced a clinical psychologist, asking him why people kill famous people. The psychologist said it was to become famous themselves, "and, unfortunately, certain irresponsible people in the media are only too eager to turn these assassins into instant celebrities." Koppel then introduced a profile of Stutts.

Everybody interviewed on the subject, including his former pastor, said Stutts was "Quiet, kind of a loner," which is what people always tend to say about famous killers, whether their victims are famous or not. But Koppel asked them all, "Do you think he killed Buckwheat?" They all said, "Oh, yes!" showing they were not surprised about his apparent guilt. His high school yearbook showed him to be President of the Future Assassins of America, and his class voted him "Most Likely to Kill Buckwheat."

Then, they parodied the shooting of Oswald in 1963, just 2 days after the assassination of President John F. Kennedy. Stutts was even dressed like Oswald, wearing a sweater, and the shooter was wearing a hat like the one Jack Ruby wore while shooting Oswald. Stutts' killer was not identified on the air.

There was also a new "commercial": "Brought to you by Mutual Life: Because you could die tomorrow." The last time, the announcer added, "Just like John David Stutts."

In spite of the "death," and having tired of the character, Murphy has brought Buckwheat back a few times.

My Top 10 Burgers

They were as close as 17 miles from where I lived, and as far away as 2,514 miles. Only 3 were in my home State, and 1 was, in a manner of speaking, in a foreign country.

All were cheeseburgers. None was at the chain Cheeburger Cheeburger, but one was at the place that inspired the sketch that inspired that chain's name.

Five of them were eaten with family. Two were eaten with a member of my family born in 1924, and another was eaten with 2 members of my family born in 2007.

One was eaten in a major league sports facility -- but not one you might expect, given my rooting proclivities.

One was good enough to make the Top 10, but it wasn't even the best burger, or the 2nd-best meal, that I had in a span of 54 hours. One of them ahead of it was good enough to be Number 4 on this list, and it still wasn't the best meal I had in a span of 8 hours.

And one was a desperate dash to avoid a bad burger -- and it became one of the luckiest breaks of my dining life.

UPDATE and Honorable Mention: Main Street Cravings, Clinton, New Jersey, December 13, 2025. West Jersey -- the Counties of Sussex, Warren, and, in this case, Hunterdon, is a conservative region which seems to defy connections to the nearby liberal cities of New York and New Jersey. But Clinton -- not named for Bill or Hillary -- is a cutesy little town with an old red mill and little specialty shops that defies connection with the goobers around them.

It would be funny, and even typical of the town, if Main Street Cravings were not on Main Street, but it is. Its signature burger is The Main Event: "Double smashed beef patties, served on a toasted Martin's potato roll, topped with American Cheese, grilled onions, pickles and our Crave sauce. A nostalgic cheeseburger with a modern twist." I don't know what's in the Crave sauce, and I don't care: It's great.

10. Five Guys, Rio Grande, New Jersey, November 25, 2016. This was the day after Thanksgiving, returning from a family vacation in Ocean City, Maryland. My sister, my brother-in-law, and their youngest daughter got in one car, and only they know for sure how they got back, what they did, and what they ate along the way. The other car was me, my mother, and my other 2 nieces, the twins Ashley and Rachel.

Five Guys started in the D.C. area, and worked their way Northeast, and are now all over the country. I first found them in Philadelphia, and wasn't impressed. Maybe it was just a bad day, because I've enjoyed them a great deal since. Even my mother likes them, and she's very much in the Smashburger camp. Ashley and Rachel like them, too. When Mom suggested that this was where we should go, none of us hesitated.

And since it's hard to separate one Five Guys burger from another, I chose the one I had with the 3 of them, at this place on U.S. Route 9, outside Cape May and Wildwood.

Five Guys opened a store in my hometown of East Brunswick earlier this year, with a Starbucks right next door. Mom heartily approves, since she's also a Starbucks addict.

9. Lum's, Richmond, Virginia, May 15, 1981. My mother, my sister (then not quite 2 years old), my grandmother and I (then 11) went to Williamsburg for this weekend, and stopped for dinner at this place, a chain that went out of business a year later.

They had a menu item called the Ollieburger. There was a picture of Ollie holding his burger. He looked like Les Nessman, the radio newsman on the then-current hit CBS sitcom WKRP in Cincinnati, played by Richard Sanders. Apparently, this burger had some interesting herbs and spices, a la Kentucky Fried Chicken -- which I'd never had to that point (but have since come to enjoy). Ollie and his burger did not let me down. What is a letdown is that I never got to go back.

8. Shake Shack, Flushing, New York, May 29, 2009. This was my 1st visit to the Mets' new ballpark, Citi Field. Restaurateur Danny Meyer founded Shake Shack, Blue Smoke barbecue, El Verano Taqueria, Box Frites and Papa Rosso, all of which can be found there.

I was reminded of the film Pulp Fiction, in which Mia Wallace (Uma Thurman) talks Vincent Vega (John Travolta) into trying the milkshake at a 1950s-themed restaurant, even though it cost $5.00 in 1994 -- about $8.36 in today's money, which is still more than a "black and white" (mixed chocolate and vanilla) shake cost at Shake Shack in 2009 ($7.50). It's not worth $5.00, let alone $7.50 or $8.36, but it's a pretty good milkshake. The burger? Also really good.

The problem is, you can (and I did) lose an entire inning on line at Shake Shack at Citi Field. The Mets had years to plan this and get it right, as the Yankees did with the concessions at the new Yankee Stadium. The Yankees got it right. The Mets didn't. So what else is new?

Oh yes, the game: The Mets beat the team then known as the Florida Marlins, 2-1 in 11 innings.

7. Lindy's Bon Apetit, Washington, District of Columbia, October 29, 2011. In 2008, Andy Pollin and Leonard Shapiro published The Great Book of Washington DC Sports Lists. As with other books in this series, representing other cities, they included some non-sports lists. One was "DC's Best Burgers." This list was how I first heard about Five Guys. Number 1 on their list was Lindy's.

It's a small place just east of the campus of George Washington University, in the basement of a townhouse. I won't say it's worth a trip to D.C. all by itself. I will say that, once you're in D.C., it's worth a visit to that neighborhood all by itself. (It's not like the neighborhood is bad, but neither is it particularly noteworthy.)

This was the day that Arsenal beat Chelsea 5-3 at Stamford Bridge, and I watched that game at D.C.'s foremost "football pub," Lucky Bar, off Dupont Circle. Sadly, they didn't serve breakfast. So Lindy's was, essentially, both breakfast and lunch for me.

6. Billy Goat Tavern, Chicago, Illinois, June 1, 1999. Allegedly, this place was the inspiration for "Olympia Café," a sketch on Saturday Night Live, in which John Belushi, playing a Greek immigrant running a diner, would say, "No hamburger: Cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger..." (Not "Cheeburger." I've also seen it written as "Chizburger" and "Cheeseborger.") Also, "No fries, chips!" and, "No Coke, Pepsi!"

That was the claim of Don Novello (SNL writer, better known as the character Father Guido Sarducci): That the sketch was based on the Billy Goat Tavern. In fact, Belushi himself, despite being born in Chicago and raised in nearby Wheaton, Illinois, said he'd never set foot in the place. His younger brother Jim Belushi backed this up, saying the sketch was based on their uncle, an Albanian immigrant who had a hot dog stand on the Northwest Side of Chicago.

But the brothers' father, Adam, owned a diner called The Olympia in Wheaton. And there was an Olympia Café on the Upper West Side of Manhattan, not far from NBC's Rockefeller Center studio where SNL was staged, in the late 1970s when the sketch aired. So, at the least, we know where the name came from.

The Billy Goat Tavern opened in 1934, on Madison Street on the West Side, across from the Chicago Stadium arena, then home of the NHL's Chicago Blackhawks. Greek immigrant William Sianis, a.k.a. Billy Goat, bought the bar, previously known as the Lincoln Tavern, with a check for $205 -- about $3,800 in today's money. He knew the check would bounce, but he made the money up on his 1st weekend. Ever since, a sign has been hung in the place, saying, "We don't accept checks, not even my own. -- Billy Goat."

In 1944, both major political parties held their Conventions at the Stadium, and Billy, a Catholic immigrant -- not to mention someone who needed the favor of the city's Democratic establishment just to stay open -- was, naturally, a Democrat, and put up a sign saying, "No Republicans Allowed." This led to angry Republicans demanding to be served, and Billy made money like a Republican that week.

He had a mascot for the bar, an actual goat. In 1945, he took the goat to Wrigley Field for Game 4 of the World Series, and bought 2 tickets, 1 for each of them. At the time, this was perfectly legal, if a bit weird. (Today, only licensed service animals, like seeing-eye dogs, are allowed in sports venues.)

But the fans complained about the goat's odor, and they were ejected. The Cubs lost the Series in 7 games, and Billy sent a telegram to Cubs owner Phil Wrigley, saying, "Who stinks now?" Supposedly, he put a powerful Greek curse on the Cubs, saying they would never win another Pennant -- and the Curse of the Billy Goat, or at least its legend, was born.

The Tavern catered to the Stadium's hockey, boxing and concert crowds (the NBA's Chicago Bulls didn't debut until 1966), until 1964, when Sianis moved operations to 430 North Michigan Avenue, actually the lower deck of that double-decked street.

Why there? Because it was surrounded by the offices of the city's 3 major daily newspapers: The Chicago Daily News (which went out of business in 1978), the Chicago Sun-Times, and the Chicago Tribune, the self-described "World's Greatest Newspaper" -- which also ran a radio station and a TV station with those initials: WGN.

Columnist Mike Royko would end up writing for all 3 papers, and the Tavern was essentially his office; he mentioned it in many columns, making it famous long before the Cheeseburger Sketch. When Billy Sianis died in 1970, Royko wrote that it happened in the middle of the night: "Of course. Billy couldn't die during operating hours."

Billy's nephew, Sam Sianis, inherited the place. Royko asked him if he would lift the curse on the Cubs. No, he said, not as long as the Wrigley family still owned the team.

In 1981, William Wrigley Jr. sold the team to The Tribune Company, and they invited him to come and lift the curse. He came, and brought the bar's current goat mascot, and walked him around the field, and, upon completing his circuit, said, "The curse is lifted!"

Except the Cubs had postseason defeats in 1984 (a disaster), 1989, 1998, 2003 (an even more notorious disaster, and at home, no less), 2007, 2008 and 2015. So whatever was standing in the way of a Cub Pennant, it wasn't the Sianis family or their goats. (At least, not anymore.)

I visited Chicago on Memorial Day Weekend 1999, and went to the Tavern. There are contradictory signs, saying, "Butt in anytime" and "Enter at your own risk." Sam was there, and was friendly enough -- but there was one notable difference from the SNL sketch: To my dismay, "No Pepsi. Coke." But it did serve a damn good cheeseburger.

Mike Royko did not live to see the Cubs win the World Series in 2016. Sam Sianis did. Sam has also opened locations elsewhere in the city: A few blocks away at the Merchandise Mart, at the Navy Pier, at O'Hare Airport, and a few steps from the original location, on Madison Street, taking on foot traffic from Chicago Stadium's successor, the United Center, which opened in 1994. He also opened a location in Washington, 3 blocks west of Union Station, which appeals to Chicago transplants, including Illinois natives working for the federal government.

5. Hualapai Ranch, Peach Springs, Arizona, March 28, 1991. When I turned 21, Grandma decided I should go to Atlantic City and learn how to drink and gamble. But our intended bus trip got snowed out. So she decided to send me right to the major leagues: She booked a 4-day vacation in Las Vegas. Let's just say that the great burger on this trip wasn't on the flight out, or on the flight back, or at the McDonald's I ate at in Vegas.

We took a side trip to Hoover Dam, the Grand Canyon, and the Hualapai Indian Reservation. The burgers they served there were from beef raised on the Reservation, meaning they had traveled not 2,000 miles, but less than 100 miles. They were very fresh. And they were very good. At the time, the best burger I'd ever had.

4. Bull On the Beach, Ocean City, Maryland, November 23, 2016. The aforementioned Thanksgiving Weekend vacation not only ended with the family split into 2 separate cars, but began that way. I had looked at the map, and decided that the best place to have lunch would be at the Christiana Mall in Delaware, which was not only pretty close to the halfway point between EB and OCMD, but had a Panera, which I like and Mom loves.

The best-laid plans of Mike and men went astray -- to our advantage. We were just short of Exit 3 on the New Jersey Turnpike at 10:40 AM, when Mom said she was really hungry. And I remembered The British Chip Shop, serving food in the style of the British Isles, in the Philadelphia suburb of Haddonfield, which I described to Mom as seeming a lot like Princeton, which we both like. Had she waited 2 more minutes to tell me, we would have been past that exit. The only problem was, the place didn't open until 11:00, so we had to wait outside for 5 minutes.

She had a shepherd's pie, and I had fish and chips and a bottle of "Scotland's other national drink," the orange soda called Irn Bru (pronounced like "iron brew"). We shared a Scotch egg, which she'd never had before. This was not the healthiest of meals.

We got to Ocean City on time, and our hotel was literally a few steps from the most famous restaurant in the town, Bull On the Beach. I ordered French onion soup and their Bull Brisket sandwich: "Tender brisket smoked over charcoal for 12 hours. Seasoned with a savory, sweet and salty dry rub then completed with sauteed onions and melted cheddar cheese. Served on a fresh toasted onion brioche roll -- Smokey Goodness!" I wholeheartedly agree. And, yes, while it wasn't ground beef molded into a patty, I'm counting it as a "burger."

Speaking of heart, this may have been the day when I most put myself at risk of a heart attack. Having had that soup, I took one bite of the burger, loved it... and realized that I wasn't going to finish it. I also realized that the next day, Thanksgiving Day, was going to present the big meal about halfway between the traditional times for lunch and dinner. So I had the sandwich packed up in a to-go box, and put it in my hotel room's refrigerator, heated it up the next day at noon, and went to town on it. Nice town.

I highly recommend The British Chip Shop in Haddonfield, New Jersey. I highly recommend Bull On the Beach in Ocean City, Maryland. I highly recommend not dining at both on the same day. I want you to live long enough to tell me about it.

UPDATE: The British Chip Shop closed on December 23, 2018. The owner was getting on in years, and didn't think he could physically meet the demands that would come with another 5-year lease. He and his family still run the English Gardener Gift Shop across the street, and the Victoria Freehouse in Philadelphia's Headhouse Square. However, the Chip Shop was saved, bought by a new owner who kept it open.

3. Molly Maguire's, Clark, New Jersey, February 7, 2010. My sister invited me to watch Super Bowl XLIV with friends of hers from work at Molly's, near where they (except for her) lived. She told me they had the best burgers she had ever had.

UPDATE: Molly's has closed, and been replaced by a Starbucks.

By the time New Orleans Saints coach Sean Payton made that gutsy onside kick call, I was convinced she was right. At the time, I hadn't had a burger that good since, and except for...

2. Triangle Waffle, Dunn, North Carolina, July 19, 1993. Members of the youth group at Aldersgate United Methodist Church, including myself, went down to Kingstree, South Carolina to assist a local church with fixing up their parsonage.

Lots of things went wrong on this trip. I made the mistake of wearing good pants, and got paint on them. We lost power for a couple of hours. Our closing-day trip to nearby Myrtle Beach got rained out. But, for the most part, we had a good time.

On the way down Interstate 95, we spent the night at a church in Fredericksburg, Virginia. The next morning, I got into a discussion with one of the kids about how I can usually tell that a restaurant with a good name -- literally, not just its reputation -- is going to have good food.

He was originally from Philadelphia, and told me about The Rib Crib in Germantown, in Northwest Philly. I told him it sounded great. The next morning, we gassed up the vans, and across the road was a rib joint called Oinkers Away. I wanted to eat there so badly, but it was breakfast time, we had to go, and I've never been back to Fredericksburg.

Remember that book of D.C. sports lists I mentioned? Well, there's a Philly version, written by all-sports WIP hosts Big Daddy Graham and Glen Macnow, and they asked former Temple University basketball coach John Chaney to name his Top 10 Philly eateries. He mentioned The Rib Crib. Unfortunately, I keep treating it as one of those places I'll get around to visiting eventually, and never have.

UPDATE: Oinkers Away closed later that year. The Rib Crib lasted until 2017.

Anyway, we went down I-95 through southern Virginia, deep into North Carolina, and turned off into the town of Dunn. Everybody wanted to go to Burger King. You'll notice that Burger King doesn't appear on this list. Nor does McDonald's, but McDonald's is filet mignon compared to Burger King.

In desperation, I looked around, to see if there was an alternative. There was: Across the highway, there was a diner. I never wrote the name of it down. Big mistake. Years later, Google Maps helped me find out it was called Triangle Waffle.

I went in, and ordered a cheeseburger. This was a church trip. God blessed me the with the greatest beef sandwich I'd ever had. It was so good, I ordered another to go, and enjoyed it as we stopped to gas up again in South Carolina. I've never been back to Dunn, either, but I want that burger again!

I thought I could never top it. I'm glad I was wrong:

1. The Ugly Mug, Cape May, New Jersey, May 2, 2015. As I said, you can usually count on a restaurant or bar with a great name. The Ugly Mug is not quite the southernmost bar in the State of New Jersey, but it might be the best.

It serves the Ocean Burger. That's it in the photo. It's a burger with shrimp salad. Maybe the funkiness of Cape May, or the salty Shore air, or something else added to it. But I've never had a better meal in my life. Not even at a wedding reception in the fanciest of banquet halls.

The Ocean Burger at the Ugly Mug is a beautiful thing.