All Right, You Primitive Screwheads...

In the words of the immortal Bruce Campbell, playing Ash Williams in the 1993 film Army of Darkness...

All right, you primitive screwheads, listen up!

An innocent man does whatever it takes to prove his innocence. He does not do whatever it takes to gain immunity from prosecution.

A President who has just faced an assassination attempt does not worry about his shoes, pump his fist, yell, "Fight! Fight! Fight!" or promote a ballroom project. A President who staged an assassination attempt does that.

When people tell you, "The Supreme Court is on the ballot," believe them.

Bernie Sanders was not robbed by the Democratic National Committee. Quite the opposite: Just by letting him into their Primaries, they bent over backwards to accommodate him. He wasn't robbed by the DNC. He was rejected by Democratic voters, who knew that he had been talking trash about their Party for half a century.

What Israel is doing is Gaza is bad, but it is not genocide. It is in response to an act of genocide.

What Russia is attempting in Ukraine is an attempt to not only conquer the country, but to wipe out its culture and impose its own. That is genocide.

The new Yankee Stadium is not a "little league park." The proof of this is that the Yankees can hit anywhere.

Derek Jeter was an excellent defensive shortstop. Your "defensive metrics" are meaningless.

Large amounts of money were never going to be enough to save the Mets.

"Wins Above Replacement" has no value. Actual winning has value.

No one has ever proven that Roger Clemens used steroids, and David Ortiz and Barry Bonds did each fail a steroid test.

The two biggest wastes of time that ESPN covers happen practically back-to-back: The Masters and the NFL Draft.

Aaron Rodgers may still be talented, but in the ways that matter, he is a bum.

The Liberty Mutual commercials -- both the ones at the Statue of Liberty and the LiMu Emu & Doug ads -- have run their course, and it's time to retire them.

Speaking of TV commercials: If it takes longer to mention the side effects of a drug than its benefits, and you need people to dance in your commercial, it's time to pull the drug. And the commercial. And do more testing on both.

That said, Zepbound has worked for me. I've lost 20 pounds. That said, I don't know if it, or any other drug, is right for you. Talk to your doctor.

Charles Barkley has lost over 100 pounds on a different GLP-1 drug, but just because a celebrity uses a product doesn't mean it's good. Shaquille O'Neal endorses Icy Hot, but it did nothing for me.

East Brunswick needs a Wegmans. I'll settle for New Brunswick, North Brunswick, Sayreville or Old Bridge. Manalapan, Woodbridge, Bridgewater and West Windsor are just too far.

It's "I couldn't care less," not "I could care less."

 
The past tense of "slay" is "slew," not "slayed."
 
Some of you literally don't know what "literally" means.
 
I'll relax when I'm ready. Telling me to relax makes me less relaxed.
 
And Dunkin tastes better than Starbucks. And it's cheaper, too.

As you were!

Adlai and Kamala, Jack and...

I have an analogy.

Kamala Harris is this generation's Adlai Stevenson: Inspiring millions, but unable to break through with the majority.

We don't yet know who our John F. Kennedy, taking us over the finish line, and becoming the great leader of the era, will be.

I saw a lot of people hoping that Joe Biden wouldn't run again, and, if so -- and then, once he did so decide -- that the Democratic nominee for President should be Gavin Newsom.

So maybe if we accept that, for at least another generation, this country isn't decent enough to elect a woman as President, the office can be won by a man capable of taking conservatives on and taking them down, and Newsom could be "our JFK."

If not him, I don't know who it would be. But he has to be considered the 2028 front-runner now:

* Kamala isn't going to be allowed to run again.

* Other women will run, but won't be allowed to stay in the race past the New Hampshire Primary. So, Elizabeth Warren, Amy Klobuchar, Kirsten Gillibrand, forget it.

* Bernie Sanders is older than Joe Biden, and has never been a Democrat, anyway.

* Cory Booker is black. He's not getting the nomination. Not in 2028, anyway.

* Pete Buttigieg is gay. He's not getting the nomination. Not in 2028, anyway.

Newsom is white. He's male. He's straight. He's married. He has children. He has none of the things that the pundits have now branded as negatives -- Kamala's or otherwise. He'll be 59 at the time of the next election, just the right age. He's good-looking. He's well-spoken. He comes off great on television. He's smart. He's experienced. He's not afraid to shove the Republicans' arguments right back in their ugly fascist faces.

Downsides? Only one that I can see: He had an affair that ended his 1st marriage. But that was to Kimberly Guilfoyle, who turned out to be not just a Trump fangirl, but is now engaged to Donald Trump Jr. Besides, if the other side brings up an affair from over 20 years ago, we can remind them that Trump proved that character doesn't matter.

Of course, maybe the "JFK" we're looking for is someone else, someone that we haven't yet considered. In which case, your guess is as good as mine.

Top 5 Reasons You Can't Blame Hillary Clinton for "Losing" the Presidential Election

November 8, 2016: I told you to vote for Hillary.

Some of you listened.

Some of you didn't, and are feeling fooled -- as you damn well should feel. I forgive you.

Some of you didn't listen, and still support Trump. I do not forgive you.

Some of you didn't listen, but still say Hillary was not a better choice. You are the problem, not those others. You made the difference, not the people who supported Trump then and still support him now.

Top 5 Reasons You Can't Blame Hillary Clinton for "Losing" the Presidential Election

5. Donald Trump. Say what you want about the guy -- while you still can -- and I have. But, however despicable, his campaign was very effective.

"No, this is not a white power gesture, that I can tell you.

I am not signaling to America's bigots that I am one of them.

I should know. Nobody signals his supporters better than me.

Believe me!"

4. Trump Cheated. Vladimir Putin and the Russian government, and Julian Assange and his WikiLeaks (or "RusskiLeaks"), fabricated statements that spoke to the "Crooked Hillary" lie, and a bunch of gullible people believed it.

Furthermore, Russian hacked America's voting machines. This is not, as Trump called it, a hoax. The Senate even confirmed this. The Republican-controlled Senate, mind you.

But that might not have mattered, if not for...

3. James Comey. The Director of the FBI, and a native of Allendale, Bergen County, New Jersey, Comey, in effect, turned the election with 2 weeks to go by revealing... nothing at all, but raising suspicions about Hillary. He stands 6-foot-8, but came up small when our country needed him most.

Comey went on to get fired by Trump anyway, for apparent disloyalty. He is the one guy who has gone through this hated by both sides.

As Williams Shakespeare might say,

"A plague from both our houses!"

2. The Media. They were absolutely terrified of being called "liberal" and the charge that the election was "rigged." So they weren't willing to call Trump out on his crimes and lies, as they had been against John McCain in 2008 and Mitt Romney in 2012.

Then there were those media outlets that actually promoted Trump, because they either had a financial interest in a close election, or actually wanted a conservative to be President, or wanted the "entertainment" of a Trump Presidency. You know, like when the entertainer Ronald Reagan was in office. In each of these cases, you people know who you are. And we will not forget.

As usual, conservatives said CNN was against Trump. That's insane: They wanted Trump. But if Ted Turner -- who, I've heard, is not well -- were still running CNN, Trump would have been arrested by the FBI when he got to the bottom of the escalator.

But the biggest culprits of all?

1. The Progressive Purists. The people who wanted Bernie Sanders, but didn't go along with him when he endorsed Hillary. The people who voted for Jill Stein instead. The people who voted for Gary Johnson instead. The people who actually considered Trump to be more progressive. And the people who stayed home, and didn't vote at all.

Stein's vote totals in what turned out to be the 3 key States -- Pennsylvania, Michigan and Wisconsin -- were greater than Trump's margin of victory.

"The left" -- a term conservatives throw around, as if they know what it means -- does this at least once every generation:

* In 1948, they refused to vote for Harry Truman, and instead voted for Henry Wallace. That time, the Democrat won anyway.

* In 1968, they didn't get Robert Kennedy or Gene McCarthy, so they refused to vote for Hubert Humphrey, and mostly stayed home. And we got Richard Nixon.

* In 1980, they didn't get Ted Kennedy, so they refused to vote for Jimmy Carter, and mostly stayed home. And we got Ronald Reagan.

* In 2000, they didn't get Ralph Nader, so they refused to vote for Al Gore, and either stayed home, or voted for Nader anyway. And we got George W. Bush.

* In 2016, they didn't get Bernie Sanders, so they refused to vote for Hillary Clinton, and either stayed home, or voted for Jill Stein. And we got Donald Trump.

In 1968, 1980, 2000 and 2016, each time, the left caused the election of the President who was the least like the one they wanted.

Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me four times, and I'm a progressive purist.

VERDICT: Not Guilty. Hillary got more votes than any Presidential candidate, ever, except for Barack Obama in 2008 and 2012.

So don't tell me she was "unpopular." That is a lie.

And don't tell me she was "a flawed candidate." They all are.

This time, if you haven't already, don't let anything stop you. Show up. Vote.

Vote for Joe Biden. Trump must go.

UPDATE: Biden won in 2020. But things changed, and he dropped out in 2024, leaving Vice President Kamala Harris to oppose Trump. The whole thing pretty much happened all over again, except, this time, the Director of the FBI, Christopher Wray, was not responsible in the least.

If Baseball Were Like the Iowa Caucuses

If baseball were like the Iowa Caucuses...

* Yankee Fans would be Joe Biden supporters, telling everyone that their candidate is the one best able to beat the bad guys.

* Met fans would be Bernie Sanders supporters, telling everyone that their candidate will win and has to, because everybody else is corrupt.

* Despite the fact that Kamala Harris is from Oakland, Los Angeles Dodger fans would be Harris supporters, saying they were cheated before it ever started.

* Houston Astro fans would be Pete Buttigieg supporters, swooping in with cheating, and getting caught.

* Boston Red Sox fans would be Donald Trump supporters: Just when you think they can't win this time, they cheat.

* And the Playoffs and World Series wouldn't be shown on television, and the Commissioner would still not have released the results by Thanksgiving.

*

Days until the New Jersey Devils next play a local rival: 2, this Thursday night, against the Philadelphia Flyers, a.k.a. The Philth, will be at the Wells Fargo Center. The next game against the New York Rangers, a.k.a. The Scum, will be on Saturday night, March 7, at Madison Square Garden. The next game against the New York Islanders will be on Saturday night, March 21, at the Prudential Center.

Days until the New Hampshire Primary: 7, next Tuesday.

Days until Arsenal play again: 12, on Sunday, February 16, at 11:30 AM New York time, in Premier League action, home to North-East team Newcastle United.

Days until the New York Red Bulls play again: 26, on Sunday, March 1, at 1:00 PM, home to FC Cincinnati. Under 4 weeks.

Days until the Yankees' 2020 Opening Day: 51, at 1:00 on Thursday, March 26, away to the Baltimore Orioles. A little over 7 weeks. And now, it feels as though we can look forward to it.

Days until the U.S. national soccer team plays again: 51, at 3:45 PM New York time on March 26, 2020, against the Netherlands, at Philips Stadion in Eindhoven, home of PSV Eindhoven.

Days until the Yankees' 2020 home opener: 58, on Thursday, April 2, against the Toronto Blue Jays.

Days until the Red Bulls next play a "derby": 74, on Saturday, April 18, at 1:00 PM, against the New England Revolution, at Red Bull Arena. On Sunday, April 26, at 3:00 PM, they will play D.C. United, at Audi Field in Washington. On Sunday, May 31, at 3:00 PM, they will play New York City FC, at Yankee Stadium II. And on Saturday, June 6, at 6:00 PM, they will play the Philadelphia Union, at Red Bull Arena.

Days until the next North London Derby: 81, on Saturday, April 25, Arsenal's 1st visit to the new Tottenham Stadium, adjacent to the site of the previous White Hart Lane. Under 12 weeks. It is currently scheduled to be on the 16th Anniversary of the 2nd time that Arsenal won the League at White Hart Lane -- but also the last time Arsenal won the League anywhere. Of course, for TV reasons, the game could be moved to another date, probably the next day.

Days until the next Yankees-Red Sox series begins: 94, on May 8, 2020, at Yankee Stadium II. A little over 3 months. 

Days until Euro 2020 begins, a tournament being held all over Europe instead of in a single host nation: 129, on Friday, June 12, 2020. A little over 4 months.

Days until the next Summer Olympics begins in Tokyo, Japan: 171, on July 24, 2020. Under 6 months.

Days until East Brunswick High School plays football again: 213, on Friday night, September 4, against arch-rival Old Bridge, at the purple shit pit on Route 9. The 2020 season will mark the debut of the Big Central Football Conference, which places every high school in Middlesex, Monmouth, Mercer, Somerset and Hunterdon Counties, and a few in Union and Ocean Counties, in the same league for football only. For every other sport, EB will still be in the Greater Middlesex Conference.

Days until the next East Brunswick-Old Bridge football game: See the previous answer.

Days until Rutgers University plays football again: 214, on Saturday, September 5, at noon, home to Monmouth University, a Football Championship Subdivision School in West Long Branch, Monmouth County, New Jersey. In other words, if they don't win this game overwhelmingly, especially now that Greg Schiano is back as head coach, it will look very, very bad. Anyway, a little over 7 months.

Days until the next Presidential election, when we can dump the Trump-Pence regime and elect a real Administration: 273, on November 3, 2020. Under 9 months.

Days until the next Rutgers-Penn State football game: 298, on Saturday, November 28, at home. Under 10 months.

Days until a fully-Democratic-controlled Congress can convene, and the Republicans can do nothing about it: 334, on January 3, 2021. Under 11 months.

Days until Liberation Day: 351, at noon on January 20, 2021. Under 12 months. Note that this is liberation from the Republican Party, not just from Donald Trump. Having Mike Pence as President wouldn't be better, just differently bad, mixing theocracy with plutocracy, rather than mixing kleptocracy with plutocracy.

Days until Alex Rodriguez and David Ortiz become eligible for the Baseball Hall of Fame: 707, on January 11, 2022. Under 2 years, or a little over 23 months. We will then find out if it's okay for a Red Sox steroid cheat to be in the Hall, but not for a Yankee steroid cheat.

Days until the next Winter Olympics begins in Beijing, China: 731, on February 4, 2022. Exactly 2 years, or exactly 24 months.

Days until the next World Cup is scheduled to kick off in Qatar: 1,021, on November 21, 2022, in Qatar. Under 3 years, or under 34 months.

Days until the next Women's World Cup is scheduled to kick off: As yet unknown, but space on the international women's soccer calendar has been cleared for July 10 to August 20, 2023. So if July 10 is the tournament's starting date, that would be 1,252 days, a little under 3 1/2 years, or a little over 41 months. A host nation is expected to be chosen on March 20. Bids have bee put in by Brazil (South America has never hosted), Colombia (ditto), Japan (Asia last hosted in 2007), and a joint bid by Australia and New Zealand (Oceania has never hosted).

If Seinfeld covered the 2020 Election So Far

Kramer: Jerry, Bernie Sanders is leading a revolution! Ya gotta vote for him!

Jerry: No way! He's old and stale! And he's creepy! And he's done nothing for 30 years! It would be like voting for Uncle Leo!

*

Jerry: George, you only like Tulsi Gabbard because she's attractive.

George: No, no!

Elaine: (Nods, yes, yes)

Jerry: I think, yes, yes!

Elaine: George, she's trash.

George: She's not trash.

Jerry: Was she in the trash?

George: She was on top of the trash.

Jerry: Then she's trash.

*

Elaine: I like Beto O'Rourke. He's sponge-worthy.

(2 weeks later)

Elaine: I don't like what Beto said about supporting Tulsi. I'm switching to Mayor Pete.

Jerry: Pete Buttigieg? But he's gay! Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Elaine: (Has a desperate look on her face)

Jerry: Wait... Oh my God, don't tell me! You're not thinking about... conversion?

Elaine: Jerry, I need a shortstop. Real bad.

(2 weeks later)

Elaine: Well, I should have stuck with my sisters. I'm voting for Elizabeth Warren.

Jerry: What about Kamala Harris? She's a woman and a person of color.

Elaine: Jerry, Warren is Native American.

(2 weeks later)

Elaine: Okay, K-Hive it is.

*

Jerry: I'm voting for Joe Biden.

Kenny Bania: Why? Go with Andrew Yang. He's gold, Jerry, gold.

Jerry: No. We need somebody who can beat Trump. Besides, Biden's a smart guy. And yet, he's a gaffe machine. And I'm a comedian.

*

Jerry, seeing the red MAGA hat coming: Hello, Newman.

Newman, seeing Jerry's Biden pin: Hello, Jerry. Still a beta snowflake cuck who can't get over 2016, I see.

Elaine: You know, Newman, Trump once grabbed me by the pussy. Back when only New Yorkers knew what a son of a bitch he is. That's why he talks like that now: I hit him so hard, it gave him brain damage.

*

Old Woman On Street: I'm not voting at all. It doesn't matter. They're all corrupt!

Jerry: Shut up, you old bag!

*

Jerry's closing monologue: I think everybody is voting for the person who makes them feel like they did when they were kids, and they had no responsibility, and had a President they thought was cool. Young Republicans see Trump as the 2003 and 2004 version of George W. Bush, taking names and kicking ass, and showing that it doesn't matter if the liberals say he's stupid.

Middle-aged Republicans, who grew up in the 1970s and '80s, see him as the new Ronald Reagan, cutting taxes, putting anti-abortion Judges on the Supreme Court, and standing up to America's enemies. Even though he's bending over backwards for Russia. And North Korea. And the Middle Eastern dictators.

Old Republicans, who grew up in the 1940s and '50s, see him as the new Dwight D. Eisenhower, always winning with a smile. Except Ike appointed Earl Warren as Chief Justice, sent the 101st Airborne to desegregate a school, and played less golf. And Trump looks like an idiot when he smiles.

Now, with the Democrats, Kamala Harris supporters and Cory Booker supporters tend to be young, so they're looking for the new Barack Obama. Elizabeth Warren voters are a little older, so they're looking for Bill Clinton, except someone who is a woman, rather than someone chasing women. Older Democrats, even though they might now be older than these guys, they're looking at Beto and Mayor Pete, because they see the new Jack or Bobby Kennedy.

The outlier is the Bernie Sanders voters. They come in all ages, so they were either there for the cool reforms of the 1960s, or they wish they were, and they see him as the guy who can finish the revolution. All he's gotta do is not have another heart attack, not crash into any more doors, or not drool. In other words, not be the end of the Administration of Woodrow Wilson. Because, let's face it: Jane Sanders is no Edith Wilson! Except for the hating black people part.

It's 2030 and...

Note: The following was written before we had any idea that COVID-19 would happen, but also before we knew that Trump would lose in 2020, fair and square, and leave the White House being escorted out by the Secret Service at Noon on Inauguration Day.

It's 2030, and...

* The Wall has finally been dedicated. Not at the border of the U.S. and Mexico, which became unnecessary after Imperator Donald nuked Mexico. No, it's at the border of the U.S. and Canada. Imperatora Ivanka dedicates it, and officially makes a liar out of President John F. Kennedy: "We have never needed to put a wall up to keep our people in."

But JFK remained right with the statement he made right before that in West Berlin in 1963: "Freedom has many difficulties, and democracy is not perfect, but... " That was why Imperator Donald, then still "President Donald Trump," fired Robert Mueller in March 2018.

When voters, against all obstacles, voted to have a Democratic Congress in November 2018, Trump, rather than allow himself to be impeached and removed when the new Congress convened in January 2019, suspended the Constitution of the United States, declared himself Imperator (the one time he listened to his wife Melania, who said it sounded more authoritative than its English equivalent, "Emperor"), and federalized every State's National Guard and State Police.

"What have you got to lose?" he said when he ran in 2016. We all found out.

Then came August 19, 2020. Some call it Black Wednesday, others call it the Night of the Long Knives. A week before what was supposed to be the Republican Convention -- since there would be no election, it was essentially just a celebration of the Imperator -- Ivanka finally realized that her father was not mentally fit to rule.

So she had her father quietly smothered with his pillow, had her stepmother Melania deported back to Slovenia, declared her half-brother Barron and her half-sister Tiffany bastards and out of the line of succession, and had her brothers Donald Jr. and Eric killed, as "liabilities." At least, in that, she was honest.

For 10 years, now, America has been on its own. In all fairness, the killings that happened between November 2018 and August 2020 did stop. But the imprisonments and the deportations have continued.

So have the "self-deportations." Whereas, in 2015, black people made up 12.6 percent of the U.S. population, now, in 2030, they make up less than 8 percent. Hispanics made up 17.1 percent, but that number has been cut in half, to, again, less than 8 percent. There were 1.4 million Muslims living in America in 2015; in 2030, there are believed to be less than 200,000.

* The 100th Anniversary of the Great Depression has nearly been matched: The economy is in shambles. Pretty much anybody who can avoid paying taxes does. As part of the nation's 250th Anniversary celebrations in 2026, Imperatora Ivanka "purchased" the tax-haven Cayman Islands from the United Kingdom of England and East Belfast.

I put "purchased" in quotation marks because she told King Charles III and Prime Minister Boris Johnson that she would let President Vladimir Putin of Russia do whatever he wanted in their country if they didn't agree. With "Brexit" fully implemented, England out of the European Union, Scotland and Wales out of the UK and back in the EU, Ireland reunited (except for pro-Unionist East Belfast), and the Imperatora in charge of NATO and within her authority to deny England any help, they realized it was an offer they couldn't refuse, and didn't.

* The Imperatora seems not to have figured out that, with the middle class having shrunk significantly, and the poor bearing most of the burden of taxation, having the poor population shrink is a bad idea. Yet with 81-year-old Wayne LaPierre, former pitchman for the National Rifle Association, as her Minister of Internal Security, guns are everywhere, and poor people, regardless of race, are clogging the emergency rooms and funeral parlors.

A prominent online columnist called it the "Kill 'em all, let God sort 'em out" philosophy. Shortly thereafter, he began to feel ill. Within a month, he was dead of polonium poisoning, a.k.a. "The New Russian Flu."

Only the rich can fly now, aboard the reborn Trump Airlines, which bought out all other airlines. Amtrak was disbanded in 2022, and so Greyhound is more clogged than ever. Basically, if you don't have a car, you're not going anywhere.

* Awards shows are still in place, but with strict censorship on films, TV shows and music, no one but the government's biggest fans wants to watch them.

* What's sports like? Well, the Yankees still haven't won the World Series, or even a Pennant, since 2009. Gleyber Torres is 34 years old, and sitting on the bench for the Virginia Beach Blue Jays. There are still people saying he will break through one of these days, and that Yankee general manager Brian Cashman still should never have traded him.

(The Jays left Toronto after it became clear that Major League Baseball would contract them if they didn't get out of "socialist Canada.")

The World Series is won by the Texas Rangers, after superstar catcher Gary Sanchez hits 3 home runs in Game 6 against the Los Angeles Dodgers. Sanchez has starred for the Rangers since July 31, 2019, when Cashman traded him there for 5 players who never reached the major leagues.

Giancarlo Stanton retired due to injury after the 2024 season, stuck on 399 career home runs, having never won a Pennant.

John Moynihan, son of Tom Brady, was last season's NFL Rookie of the Year, as he led the New England Patriots to win Super Bowl LXIV. His total gives the Patriots, and the Brady family, a total of 14 Super Bowl wins.

It's a lot easier for the Patriots to win now, because there are only 16 teams left in the NFL. Several teams, including the New York Jets, had to fold, because they were unable to field full teams. Due to the concussions and other injuries that football players sustain, far fewer parents are willing to let their kids try out for football.

The Canadian Hockey League folded in 2028, unable to support itself with just the Canada-based teams that were kicked out of the NHL in 2024.

Major League Soccer folded in 2027, following America's failure to qualify for 3 straight World Cups, and being denied the right to host any part of the 2026 World Cup following Imperator Donald's nuking of Mexico.

* An attempt to break Chelsea Clinton out of prison fails. Malia and Sasha Obama are under house arrest.

* There are still people who say that 89-year-old Bernie Sanders will beat Ivanka in 2032. They don't seem to be aware that there won't be an election.

*

You say this can't happen? Admittedly, it's a very bleak scenario.

But isn't what has already happened bad enough?

*

Assuming the preceding does not come to pass...

Days until the U.S. national soccer team plays again: Unknown. They did play last night, a weak 0-0 draw with Bosnia in the Los Angeles suburbs. But no further matches have been scheduled. They were supposed to play at the World Cup in June. Alas... 

Days until The Arsenal play again: 1, tomorrow afternoon at 2:45 PM our time, away to Swansea City of Wales. Having beaten West London club Chelsea in the Semifinal of the League Cup, sold liability Alexis Sanchez, and purchased Henrikh Mkhitaryan (HEN-rick MICK-ih-TAIR-ee-an), it now appears that they are about to purchase Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang as well.

Days until the New Jersey Devils next play a local rival: 3, on Thursday night, against the Philadelphia Flyers, at the Prudential Center. They played the Flyers in Philadelphia today, and lost. They next play the New York Islanders on Saturday, February 24, at home. They won't play the New York Rangers again until the last week of the regular season, on Tuesday, April 3, at the Prudential Center.

Days until the next Winter Olympics begins in Pyeongchang, Korea: 11, on Friday, February 9. Under 2 weeks.

Days until the next North London Derby: 12, on Saturday, February 10, at 7:30 AM our time, at Wembley Stadium in West London, where Spurs are playing their "home games" until the new stadium they're building on the site of White Hart Lane opens the following August

Days until the New York Red Bulls play again: 40. They open at home against the Portland Timbers on March 10. Under 6 weeks.

Days until Opening Day of the 2018 Major League Baseball season: 59, on Thursday night, March 29, as the Yankees open away to the Toronto Blue Jays. Under 9 weeks. The Yankees still don't have a 2nd baseman or a 3rd baseman who can both play those positions and hit major league pitching well.

Days until the Yankees' 2018 home opener: 63, on Monday afternoon, April 2, against the Tampa Bay Rays.

Days until the next Yankees-Red Sox series begins: 71, on Tuesday, April 10, at Fenway Park.

Days until the Red Bulls next play a "derby": 96, on Saturday afternoon, May 5, home to New York City FC. Their 1st game against the Philadelphia Union will be on Saturday night, May 26, at Red Bull Arena in Harrison. Their 1st game against the New England Revolution will be on Saturday night, June 2, at Gillette Stadium in Foxboro. Their 1st game against D.C. United, and their 1st game ever at the new Audi Field, will be on Wednesday night, July 25.

Days until the next World Cup kicks off in Russia: 136, on June 14. Under 4 months. But the U.S. team won't be playing. At least now, Donald Trump doesn't have to choose, and can root for his favorite country, the host nation, Russia.

Days until the 2018 trading deadline, after which we won't have to fear Yankee general manager Brian Cashman trading any proven good players for "prospects": 183, on Tuesday, July 31. A little over 5 months.

Days until September 2018 roster call-ups, when we can finally start to expect seeing most of these wonderful "prospects" that Yankee general manager Brian Cashman wanted: 215. A little over 6 months.

Days until Rutgers University plays football again: 215, on Saturday, September 1, home to Texas State University. 

Days until East Brunswick High School plays football again: Unknown. The 2018 schedule hasn't been released yet. But the season opener is usually on the 1st Friday in September. that would be September 7, which is 221 days from now.

Days until the next Congressional election, when we can elect a Democratic Congress that can impeach and remove Donald Trump from the Presidency: 252, on November 6. A little over 8 months.

Days until the next Rutgers-Penn State game: 263, on Saturday, November 17, at High Point Solutions Stadium in Piscataway, New Jersey.

Days until the next East Brunswick-Old Bridge Thanksgiving high school football game: 268, on Thursday, November 22. A little under 9 months.

Days until the Baseball Hall of Fame vote is announced, electing Mariano Rivera: 330, on January 23, 2019. Just under a year, or a little under 12 months.

Days until the next Women's World Cup kicks off: 446, on June 7, 2019, in France. A little under a year and a half, or a little over 15 months. The U.S. team, as 3-time and defending Champions, has, as usual, a better chance than the men's team would have had in 2018 anyway.

Days until my 50th Birthday, at which point I can join AARP and get discounts for travel and game tickets: 640, on December 18, 2019.

Days until the Baseball Hall of Fame vote is announced, electing Derek Jeter: 675, on January 22, 2020. A little under 2 years, or a little under 24 months.

Days until the next Summer Olympics begins in Tokyo, Japan: 859, on July 24, 2020. A little under 2 1/2 years, or a little under 30 months.

Days until the next Presidential election, when we can dump the Trump-Pence regime and elect a real Administration: 961, on November 3, 2020. Under 3 years, or a little over 32 months.

Days until Liberation Day: 1,039, at noon on January 20, 2021. Under 3 years, or under 36 months. Note that this is liberation from the Republican Party, not just from Donald Trump. Having Mike Pence as President wouldn't be better, just differently bad, mixing theocracy with plutocracy, rather than mixing kleptocracy with plutocracy.

Days until the next World Cup for which the American team will be eligible is scheduled to kick off: 1,709, on November 21, 2022, in Qatar. Under 5 years, or about 58 months. The charges of corruption against Qatar may yet mean that they will lose the tournament, in which case it will be moved to a nation where it would not be too hot to play it in June and July.

Top 5 Reasons You Can't Blame Hillary Clinton for Losing the Presidential Election

"She's corrupt."

"She stole the nomination."

"She's too tied to the establishment."

"She's too corporate."

"She doesn't get it."

Why did she really lose?

You know damn well why she really lost. You just don't want to admit it. Well, I am now going to slap you in the face with it.

And Trump and his Deplorables are the least of the reasons.

Top 5 Reasons You Can't Blame Hillary Clinton for Losing the Presidential Election

(Note: This was written before it was known just how much the Russians had hacked the election.)

5. Donald Trump. Say what you want about the guy -- while you still can -- and I have. But, however despicable, his campaign was very effective.

4. RusskiLeaks. Julian Assange and his WikiLeaks fabricated statements that spoke to the "Crooked Hillary" lie, and a bunch of gullible people believed it.

3. James Comey. The Director of the FBI, in effect, turned the election with 2 weeks to go by revealing... nothing at all, but raising suspicions.

2. The Media. They were absolutely terrified of being called "liberal" and the charge that the election was "rigged" that they weren't willing to call Trump out on his crimes and lies.

They did a great job of doing that to George H.W. Bush in 1992, Bob Dole in 1996, John McCain in 2008 and Mitt Romney in 2012. But, just as they were afraid to do with Richard Nixon in 1968 and 1972, Ronald Reagan in 1980 and 1984, George Bush the father in 1988, and George Bush the son in 2000 and 2004, they were, by and large, afraid to make the point that Trump was unacceptable on multiple levels. They could have convinced Republicans to rise up and effectively knock him out of the race in the New Hampshire Primary. Instead, they let him win, when they knew he was unfit.

Then there were those media outlets that actually promoted Trump, because they either had a financial interest in a close election, or actually wanted a conservative to be President, or wanted the "entertainment" of a Trump Presidency. You know, like when the entertainer Ronald Reagan was in office. In each of these cases, you people know who you are. And we will not forget.

But the greatest blame for Hillary's defeat, and for whatever harm Trump causes, lies not with any of these people, or with the "Basket of Deplorables" who voted for him because he basically told them it was okay to be bigoted. No, the true blame for Trump lies with...

1. The Progressive Purists. The people who wanted Bernie Sanders, but didn't go along with him when he endorsed Hillary. The people who voted for Jill Stein instead. The people who voted for Gary Johnson instead. The people who actually considered Trump to be more progressive. And the people who stayed home, and didn't vote at all.

This time, it wasn't "Florida, Florida, Florida." Or "Ohio, Ohio, Ohio." Or "Michigan, Michigan, Michigan." Or "Pennsylvania, Pennsylvania, Pennsylvania." It was "Turnout, turnout, turnout."

Yes, progressive purists, I'm blaming you. You're repeating the same mistake that gets made once every generation or so:

* In 1896, millions of Democrats stayed home and didn't vote for William Jennings Bryan, because, in the depression that began with the Panic of 1893, they were too afraid of what the free coinage of silver would do, or were intimidated by their bosses who said that if Bryan wins on Tuesday, don't bother coming to work on Wednesday. Result: William McKinley won in a landslide, gold still ruled the American economy, and a war was launched that resulted in problems we're still dealing with, including Cuba and, incredibly now, the Philippines.

* In 1928, millions of Democrats stayed home and didn't vote for Al Smith, because he was too Catholic, or too opposed to Prohibition, or too tied to "corruption" (the Tammany Hall machine in New York, which was corrupt, although Smith himself was not). Result: Herbert Hoover won in a landslide, the stock market crashed, and the Great Depression began.

* In 1952, millions of Democrats stayed home and didn't vote for Adlai Stevenson, because he was divorced, or too tied to the "scandalous" Truman Administration (it wasn't squeaky-clean, but we're not talking Watergate here), or "soft on Communism." Result: Dwight D. Eisenhower won in a landslide, and McCarthyism continued until 1954 (until 1960 if you were in Hollywood), and civil rights stalled again.

* In 1968, millions of Democrats, some saddened by the assassination of Robert Kennedy, others disillusioned by Eugene McCarthy, stayed home and didn't vote for Hubert Humphrey, who had a 25-year record of activist liberalism, because he wasn't sufficiently opposed to the Vietnam War. Result: Richard Nixon won in a squeaker, and the war lasted another 4 years, and, lest we forget, Watergate.

* In 1980, millions of Democrats, troubled by a weakening economy and the Iran Hostage Crisis, and disappointed that Ted Kennedy couldn't get the nomination, stayed home and didn't vote for Jimmy Carter, or voted for John Anderson. Result: Ronald Reagan won in a landslide, crippling America's labor unions and killing our manufacturing base, deepening the energy crisis, appointing 4 damaging Supreme Court Justices, and running an Administration even more corrupt than Nixon's, finally resulting in his successor, George H.W. Bush, taking the fall for the recession of 1990-92.

* In 2000, millions of Democrats, angered at Bill Clinton's free trade deal, welfare reform,and sex scandal, stayed home and didn't vote for Al Gore, or voted for Ralph Nader. Result: George W. Bush got close enough to steal the election, resulting in 2 recessions (the 2nd of them the worst since the Great Depression), 9/11, the Iraq War, the response to Hurricane Katrina, and 2 radical Supreme Court Justices.

* Now, in 2016, Down from Obama's 66 million votes in 2012, Hillary won 59 million, to edge Trump in the popular vote. John Kerry in 2004, John McCain in 2008, and Mitt Romney in 2012 all got more votes than Trump did this time, and yet they all lost. (UPDATE: Hillary's total rose to 65 million, Trump's to 62 million -- each more than any candidate had ever gotten, except for Obama in 2008 and 2012.)

In a year when social media and the demand that you get out and vote were both at all-time highs, Trump got the fewest Republican votes for President in 16 years, and didn't finish 1st; yet he won the Electoral Vote, because, especially in the States of Florida, Pennsylvania, Ohio, Michigan and Wisconsin, too many of you couldn't bring yourself to vote for the most liberal Presidential nominee ever, running on the most liberal major-party platform ever.

Don't tell me she stole the nomination. She didn't. She won it fair and square. You people could have gotten Bernie Sanders nominated, if you had registered as Democrats before the Primaries. You didn't, and so you weren't allowed to vote in them. Bernie knew and accepted the rules, you didn't.

Don't tell me Bernie would have beaten Trump. You're citing polls saying he would have done so? Nearly all the polls said Hillary was going to beat him. Your polls were every bit as wrong.

Don't tell me Bernie was a better candidate to run against Trump. She was a woman and a liberal, and these bigots said the most vile things about her, none of them true. Bernie is an admitted socialist, has an illegitimate child (perhaps no big deal to you, but still a big deal to millions of people in America in 2016), and, lest we forget, is a Jew. An atheist, perhaps, but still a Jew. In other words, he would have gotten all the drawbacks of being an atheist, and all the drawbacks of being a Jew, and none of the perks of either. These are white supremacists and "Christian Identity" people we're talking about. They wanted the noose for Hillary. They would have wanted the Auschwitz oven for Bernie.

Last night, Phil Scott was elected Governor of Vermont. Bernie's adopted home State. With 53 percent of the vote. He was a Republican.

George McGovern lost 49 of 50 States against Nixon in 1972. Walter Mondale lost 49 of 50 against Reagan in 1984. If Bernie Sanders had been the Democratic nominee for President against Donald Trump, he would have been tarred as "a Communist Jew," and he would have lost all 50 States. All of them. He might have won the District of Columbia, but the Electoral Vote would have been 535-3.

Once again, like your parents, grandparents and great-grandparents before you, you refused to settle for the lesser evil, who wasn't evil at all. You accepted the lies that the candidate wasn't good enough for you, when the alternative wasn't merely not as good, but absolutely unacceptable.

Do you understand? Unacceptable. Absolutely. And yet, by voting for Johnson or Stein, or not voting at all, you made possible the election of an immature narcissist who revels in bigotry of all kinds, and brags about having committed business fraud, bankruptcy fraud, tax fraud and rape.

And when Trump and the Republican Congress enact bad policy, and overturn established good policy, and a conservative majority on the U.S. Supreme Court ratifies it, don't tell those of us who stayed loyal, "Oh my God, we had no idea." You did have an idea. And we gave it to you. But you were too goddamned stubborn to accept the truth.

And that's just the most likely bad scenario. I haven't even mentioned the unthinkable -- which a lot of Trump's voters have thought. Not those who believed that he could restore the old economy (not without a 70 percent top tax bracket and respecting unions, he can't), and wanted to "Make America Great Again." I'm talking about the actual neo-Confederates and neo-Nazis.

We've seen a few "Trayvon Martins." Imagine a million Trayvon Martins. Imagine a million Matthew Shepards. Imagine a million Hispanic equivalents. Imagine a million Muslim equivalents. Imagine a million Jewish equivalents.

We don't have to imagine it. It has happened before. Not here.

In 71 years, we have gone from stopping Germany from doing that, and rebuilding them in the image we had at the time, to wondering if Germany, a modern, civilized democracy and the leading nation of continental Europe, might have to bring Europe together and stop us. And by "us," I mean Trump and the Republicans, with those of us who didn't support him being victims just as much as those who did.

In short, all you Bernie Bots, Jill Not Hills, and Never Hillarys: If worse comes to worst, you will have allowed World War III, and America could lose. And deserve to lose.

I don't expect that to happen. But what happened during the Administrations I've cited was bad enough. Even if Trump ends up being no worse than Eisenhower, who was, at the least, a decent man (if not always knowing how to move our country forward), there's going to be an end to the progress we've made as a nation since Franklin Roosevelt's New Deal began 83 years ago.

The problem isn't the 11,000 college kids who voted for a dead gorilla. The problem isn't even the 59 million adults who voted for a live bigot.

The problem is the 12,000 of you who could have kept Michigan in the Democratic column. The 28,000 of you who could have kept Wisconsin in the Democratic column. The 78,000 of you who could have kept Pennsylvania in the Democratic column. The 120,000 of you who could have kept Florida in the Democratic column. The 434,000 of you who could have kept Ohio in the Democratic column.

Trump won the Electoral Vote 306 to 232. If you had only shown up in the numbers I just cited in Michigan, Wisconsin and Pennsylvania, Hillary would have won 278-260. It would have been close, but it would have worked.

Instead, you chose to throw away the Congress for at least 2 years, the Presidency for at least 4 years, and the Supreme Court for God only knows how long.

Your grandparents wanted Eugene McCarthy, and they got the most un-Gene-like President. Then, they wanted Ted Kennedy, and they got the most un-Teddy-like President.

Your parents wanted Ralph Nader, and they got the most un-Nader-like President.

Now, you wanted Bernie Sanders, and you got the most un-Bernie-like President.

Bernie himself warned you, and told you to vote for Hillary. You didn't. Clearly, this was never about Bernie.

In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends.
-- Martin Luther King, Jr.

But, hey, you've got your principles, right? You didn't compromise. You stayed true to your ideals, never knowing that the candidate most likely to win and enact your ideals, even in part, is now getting stitches in her back, from where you plunged in your knives.

So you play your albums. And you smoke your pot.
And you meet your girlfriend in the parking lot.
Aw, but still you're aching for the things you haven't got.
What went wrong?
Hm?
And you can't understand why your world is so dead.
Why you've got to keep in style and feed your head.
Well, you're 21, and still, your mother makes your bed.
And that's too long.
-- Billy Joel