Friday, October 30, 2020

Trump, Go Home

Oh, the newsmen in America 
he calls our stories faked.
Our bosses will not let us
tell viewers he's half-baked!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the doctors in America
we try to save your life.
But even Trump got COVID
his son and, yes, his wife!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the soldiers in America 
we're "suckers," that he said 
He sold us out to Putin. 
A bounty's on my head!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the singers in America
we're told, "Shut up and sing."
But he's an entertainer.
They let him do anything!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the children in America
we say he's mighty mean.
He's wrecked our school and Summer
and now our Halloween!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the seniors in America 
say he's too much to bear. 
He's coming for our Social
Security and Medicare!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the white evangelicals
they say he gives them wins.
But all he ever gives us
is the Seven Deadly Sins!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the golfers in America
we thought he would be neat.
He's wrecked our reputations
by being such a cheat!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the shoppers in America 
we think he's mighty foul.
We're out of toilet paper
and out of paper towels!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the athletes in America
we win a championship
but won't go to the White House
to hear him give us lip!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, policemen in America
he's with us all the way
except when we need someone
to give us better pay!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the business lords of U.S.A.
yes, even we will curse.
He may have cut our taxes
but killed our customers!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the agents of the FBI
we're joining in this tune.
We're coming for him on
Inauguration Day at noon!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, living in America
is such a rotten task.
If Trump's so damn terrific 
how come I wear a mask?

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

Oh, the voters in America
no patience left to spare.
That's why we'll all be voting
for Joe from Delaware!

Oh, I don't want no more of Donald Trump!
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go
But he don't wanna go
Gee, Ma, I wish he'd go home!

*

Hours until East Brunswick High School plays football again: 4, tonight at 7:00, home to Monroe. They beat Perth Amboy last week, and are now 2-2.

Days until Rutgers University plays football again: 1, tomorrow afternoon at 3:30, home to Indiana. Last week, they opened the season by winning away to Michigan State. Begging the question, "How bad are Michigan State?"

Days until Arsenal play again: 2, on Sunday, at 11:30 AM New York time, away to Manchester United. Yesterday, they beat Dundalk FC of Ireland in UEFA Europa League play. However, they are in 11th place in the Premier League, 6 games in.

Days until the New York Red Bulls play again: 2, on Sunday night at 7:00, away to New York City FC, at Yankee Stadium II.

Days until the Red Bulls play another "derby" game: See the previous answer. They just won one last night, beating the New England Revolution 1-0 on a goal in the 89th minute.

Days until the 2020 Presidential election: 4, this Tuesday. If you have not already done so, then, as the old saying goes, and it really is true this time, "This time, vote like your life depended on it."

Days until the next U.S. national soccer team game: 13, on Thursday, November 12, at 2:45 PM New York time, away to Wales, at the Liberty Stadium in Swansea.

Days until the next North London Derby: 36, on Saturday, December 5, at 10:00 AM New York time, at Tottenham Hotspur Stadium in North London. A little over 5 weeks. This game will likely be moved, either to another time that day, or to the next day, or maybe to the Monday night, for TV and ratings purposes.

Days until the next Rutgers-Penn State football game: 36, on Saturday, December 5, just a week later than was originally planned, at SHI Stadium in Piscataway, New Jersey.

Days until the New Jersey Devils play again: Unknown, as the NHL hasn't yet made out its 2020-21 season schedule. That's understandable, given all the uncertainty with trying to wrap up the 2019-20 season. The League is now calling about starting next season on or around January 1. If that is the date, then it's 63 days, or 9 weeks.

Days until the Devils play another local rival: Unknown, although it's unlikely that their 1st game of the season, or even their 1st home game, will be against a traditional rival.

Days until a new Congress convenes, hopefully fully Democratic: 66, on Monday, January 4, 2021. Under 4 months. Ordinarily, it would be January 3, but that's a Sunday next year.

Days until the next Presidential Inauguration: 82, on Wednesday, January 20, 2021. Under 12 weeks until Liberation Day.

Days until the Yankees' 2021 regular season begins: 153, on Thursday, April 1, home to the Toronto Blue Jays. A little over 5 months. Of course, any schedule is subject to further COVID-19 restrictions. Hopefully, by then, we will either have a vaccine, or have the virus reduced to the point where live attendance at sporting events will no longer be seen as unintentional suicide.

Days until the next Yankees-Red Sox series begins: 217, on Friday night, June 4, 2021, at Yankee Stadium II. 

Days until the COVID-delayed Euro 2020 opens in Paris: 224, on June 11, 2021. A little over 7 months.

Days until the COVID-delayed 2020 Olympics open in Tokyo, Japan: 266, on July 23, 2021. Under 9 months.

Days until the next East Brunswick-Old Bridge football game: 315, on Friday night, September 10, 2021. This presumes what has become the usual, opening the season with the rivalry that used to end the season on Thanksgiving Day.

Days until Alex Rodriguez and David Ortiz become eligible for the Baseball Hall of Fame: 438, on January 11, 2022. Under 15 months until we find out whether lying about having been caught taking steroids, as Big Papi did, is better than telling the truth about it, as A-Rod did.

Days until the next Winter Olympics open in Beijing, China: 462, on February 4, 2022. A little over 15 months.

Days until the next World Cup opens in Qatar: 752, on November 21, 2022. Under 25 months.

Days until the next Women's World Cup opens, a joint hosting by Australia and New Zealand: 983, on July 10, 2023. A little over 32 months.

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