How Long It's Been: Tottenham Hotspur Won a Trophy

Of course, they released a DVD.

This Sunday, North London soccer team Arsenal will play Manchester City in the Final of the Football League Cup, at the new Wembley Stadium in London.

Strange: Even as their rivals from 4.7 miles away, Tottenham Hotspur, seem likely to finish above them in the Premier League for the 2nd season in a row - after not doing so for 21 straight years - Arsenal still have more to show for it.

The English media have loved Tottenham for a long time, with their 1961 team becoming the 1st in the 20th Century to win both the English top flight, then called the Football League Division One, and the Football Association Cup in the same season. This is called "doing The Double," and the Baby Boomers in England loved them for it.

When Arsenal did the same in 1971, it was a different time. The Boomers had grown up, and this Arsenal side was a side for their kids, or maybe their younger brothers.

Unless you were raised in a family that loved Arsenal, you were raised to hate Arsenal - as if the two were the only teams in London. There are 12 League clubs within the M25, London's version of a road "beltway," and usually half of those are in the top flight, now called the Premier League.

When Arsenal had a run of success, 1987-94 (2 League titles, an FA Cup, 2 League Cups and the now-defunct European Cup Winners' Cup), they were not loved by the public outside North London as the 1981-84 "Spurs" side were (winning 2 FA Cups and a UEFA Cup, now called the UEFA Europa League).

When Arsenal became perhaps the greatest team in English history between 1998 and 2006 (3 League titles, 1 unbeaten, 4 Cups, 2 of them as part of Doubles), they gained admirers all over the world, thanks to the growth of satellite TV coverage. But, despite winning next to nothing, Spurs always got the more flattering coverage in the media.

As a result, when Arsenal lost the 2011 League Cup Final, that made it 6 years since they'd won a trophy. They won the 2005 FA Cup, but haven't won the League since, lost the UEFA Champions League in the 2006 Final and the 2009 Semifinal; lost the FA Cup in the 2009 Semifinal; and lost the League Cup in the Final in 2007 and 2011, and in the Semifinal in 2008 - which brings me to today's focus.

The League Cup is kind of a weird competition. All 92 clubs in the Football League, in all 4 divisions, are eligible for it. This makes it different from the FA Cup, where every Club in England, and, through an arrangement, a few teams in Wales, are eligible for it. That's over 700 years teams.

Each round is a single match, with home field advantage chosen by a lottery, until the Semifinal. Then, it's 2 legs, home-and-home. The Final, as is that of the FA Cup, is held at Wembley Stadium in West London, England's national stadium.

The FA Cup was founded in 1871. The League Cup was not founded until 1960, and thus has considerably less prestige. For a club with the kind of support that Tottenham have, winning it would be huge. For a club with the kind of support that Arsenal have, winning it would be nice, but there are more important things, and they are - at least, theoretically - within reach.

This is not the case with Tottenham. They have not won the league, under any name, since that 1961 Double. They have had close calls the last 2 seasons, but blew it - or, as they say in England, "bottled it" - both times.

Indeed, late-season collapses have happened to Spurs several times in recent years. The template was 1987. When they took the field (or "the pitch") at their former home of White Hart Lane at a Semifinal replay of the League Cup on March 4, they had a chance at a unique domestic "Treble": Winning the League, the FA Cup, and the League Cup in the same season.

But Arsenal won that game, and the Final against Liverpool. Spurs fell apart in the League, and choked in the FA Cup Final. In a span of 73 days, they went from a good chance at a unique feat to having won nothing.

(The feat has still never been accomplished: As Meghan Trainor would say, "No Treble." Manchester United won a "European Treble" in 1999: The League, the FA Cup, and the Champions League. Others teams have done this in other countries, but not in England.)

In 2006, 2012 and 2013, Spurs had a great chance to finish ahead of Arsenal. Each time, they were ahead going into the last game of the season. And, each time, the results didn't go their way. (The 2006 occurrence is the most notable. One does not simply discuss "The North London Derby" without mentioning that occurrence. It is folly.)

In 2007, the North London rivals met in the League Cup Semifinal. In the 1st leg, at The Lane, Spurs blew a 2-0 lead, and it ended 2-2. In the 2nd leg, at Arsenal's new Emirates Stadium, it was 1-1 after regulation. Away goals didn't matter, so extra time (we would say "overtime") was played, and Arsenal quickly scored twice to win 5-3 on aggregate.

In 2008, the situation was reversed. Until this season, Arsenal manager Arsène Wenger has played mainly reserves in the League Cup, trying to get them experience for more prestigious games. The 1st leg was at the Emirates, and it was a 1-1 draw. The 2nd leg, at The Lane, was no contest, as Tottenham, mainly starting their starters against "Arsène Wenger High School," won 5-1.

Spurs soon released a DVD of this game, titled The Perfect Game. A, It was starters against reserves. Big deal. B, How can it be "perfect" if you let in a goal? Morons.

February 24, 2008, 10 years ago today: Tottenham beat West London club Chelsea 2-1 to win the League Cup at Wembley Stadium. Although Didier Drogba, a.k.a. "Dogbreath," another of the most hated opponents Arsenal have ever had, due to his goals against them and his obvious and unrepentant diving, opened the scoring, Tottenham got a penalty that was buried by Dimitar Berbatov, the Vulgarian Bulgarian, and the game went to extra time. Jonathan Woodgate, a defender, scored the winner in the 94th minute.

Spurs fans acted like they'd won the League and the Cup - instead of just the League Cup. It was their 1st trophy of any kind since the 1999 League Cup. Those are the only 2 trophies they've won since their last FA Cup win in 1991, and they haven't even been to a Final in that tournament since, going 0-4 in Semis, including 0-2 against Arsenal. And that 1961 League title remains their last.

As Arsenal's trophy drought grew, to 7 years, 8 years, 9 years, before it finally ended at 9 with the 2014 FA Cup, the English media harped on it more and more. "Arsenal's trophy drought" became a catchphrase, a cliche, a meme.

Spurs have now surpassed that. But does anybody talk about "Spurs' trophy drought?"

No, because that only happens to big clubs. When Manchester United went 26 years without winning the League, from 1967 to 1993, it was talked about constantly. Now that Liverpool have gone 28 years without winning the League, since 1990, it is talked about constantly.

And now that Arsenal have gone 14 years without winning the League, since 2004, it is talked about constantly. Just as it was from 1971 to 1989, when, to borrow the phrase of author and Arsenal fan Nick Hornby, it was "Eighteen fucking years!" And when Arsenal reached the climax of the 1971 season, before winning both the League and the FA Cup that year for "The Double," their last trophy was the 1953 League title, right before Queen Elizabeth II was crowned, and they said, "Arsenal haven't won a trophy since the Coronation."

So, big clubs get this treatment. Tottenham don't. That's because Tottenham are not a big club.

But they are a club that hasn't won a trophy in 10 years. Ten years exactly. How long has that been?

*

At the time, Molson Coors, which owns the London-based Carling brand of beer, held the naming rights to the tournament. From 2003 to 2012, it was known as the Carling Cup. Previously, another brewery had it 2004-12: The Worthington Cup. This was a far cry from 1982-86, when Britain's national Milk Marketing Board had it and it was the Milk Cup; or 1993-98, when it was the Coca-Cola Cup.

Betting company Littlewoods held it 1986-90, the now-defunct electronics company Rumbelows 1990-92, Capital One 2012-16, no sponsor last year (it was just "The EFL Cup," for "English Football League"), and now, Thai-based (but Brazilian-sounding) energy drink Carabao: The Carabao Cup.

Of the 16 players Tottenham named as possibilities for use in that game: Backup goalkeeper Radek Černý was only there on loan, and did not get into the game; starting goalkeeper Paul Robinson, starting left wing Steed Malbranque, starting forward Dimitar Berbatov and backup midfielder Teemu Tainio (who entered the game in the 75th minute) left the team at the end of the season; starting left back Pascal Chimbonda, starting central midfielder Didier Zokora, and backup forward Darren Bent (who didn't get into the game) left in 2009.

Starting right back Alan Hutton, starting centreback Jonathan Woodgate, and starting forward Robbie Keane left in 2011; starting centreback and team Captain Ledley King (nicknamed "Leadfoot Queen" by Arsenal fans) retired in 2012; starting central midfielder Jermaine Jenas and backup midfielder Tom Huddlestone (known as "Hundredstone" for his hefty weight, entered the game in the 61st minute) left in 2013; and starting right wing Aaron Lennon and backup centreback Younès Kaboul (who entered the game in extra time) left in 2015. As Kaboul had left and returned to Tottenham, Lennon was the last remaining player. And manager Juande Ramos was fired early in the 2008-09 season.

King retired in 2012; Hutton, Jenas, Cerny and Tainio in 2014; Woodgate in 2016; and Robinson and Zokora in 2017. Still active: Malbranque with MDA Chasselay in France, Lennon with Lancashire club Burnley, Chimbonda with Washington F.C. of Wearside (George Washington's ancestors are said to have come from the Wearside town of Washington), Kaboul with Hertfordshire team Watford, Huddlestone and Bent with East Midlands club Derby County; and Keane and Berbatov are now playing in India, the former with Indian club ATK of Kolkata (formerly "Calcutta"), the latter with Kerala Blasters.

Tottenham have since torn down White Hart Lane, begun building their new stadium which will open next season, and are spending the 2017-18 season playing home games at Wembley.

Manchester United were then the holders of the Premier League title, and were about to win it again. Chelsea were the holders of the FA Cup, and were about to be succeeded as such by Hampshire club Portsmouth. Man United would beat Chelsea in the Final of the UEFA Champions League -- which, like the Super Bowl, is selected in advance, in the hope of getting a neutral site. So these 2 big English clubs faced each other for the championship of Europe in... Moscow. Man U succeeded AC Milan.

Some of the legends of the game have since died. From England: Bobby Robson, Nat Lofthouse, Dave Sexton, Bill Foulkes, Tom Finney, Ron Springett, Howard Kendall, Gerry Byrne, Jimmy Hill, Cyrille Regis, Jimmy Armfield, and Arsenal legend Don Howe. From Scotland: Tottenham legend Dave Mackay and Arsenal legend David Herd. From Wales: Gary Speed.

From Italy: Enzo Bearzot, Giorgio Chinaglia and Cesare Maldini. From Germany: Helmut Haller, Ottmar Walter, Bert Trautmann, Udo Lattek and Hans Schäfer. From the Netherlands: Johan Cruijff and Piet Keizer. From France: Raymond Kopa. From Hungary: Gyula Grosics. From Russia: Fyodor Cherenkov. From the Czech Republic: Josef Masopust. From Austria: Karl Stotz. From Spain: Ignacio Zoco and Manuel Sanchís Martínez.

From Brazil: Sócrates, Djalma Santos, Gilmar, Nílton Santos, Carlos Alberto, Hilderaldo Bellini, Zito and Waldir Peres. From Argentina: Alfredo Di Stéfano. From Uruguay: Alcides Ghiggia. And from Mozambique by way of Portugal: Eusébio and Mário Coluna.

Aaron Ramsey and Eden Hazard were 17 years old; Antoine Griezmann, Jack Wilshere and Neymar were 16; Mario Götze was 15; Paul Pogba and Harry Kane were 14; Deli Alli, Alex Iwobi and Gedion Zelalem were 11; Christian Pulisic was 9, Gianluigi Donnarumma was about to turn 9, and Reiss Nelson was 8.

Current Tottenham manager Mauricio Pochettino was an assistant coach at Espanyol, "the other club in Barcelona." Current New York Red Bulls manager Jesse Marsch was playing for Chivas USA in Los Angeles. Current New York City FC manager Patrick Vieira, an Arsenal legend, was playing for Internazionale Milano.

Alain Vigneault of the Rangers was the head coach of the Vancouver Canucks. John Hynes of the Devils was an assistant coach for the U.S. national hockey team. Pat Shurmur of the Giants was an assistant coach for the Philadelphia Eagles. Todd Bowles of the Jets was an assistant coach for the Miami Dolphins. Jeff Hornacek of the Knicks was an assistant coach for the Utah Jazz. Kenny Atkinson of the Nets was an assistant coach for the Knicks. Aaron Boone of the Yankees was playing for the Washington Nationals. Doug Weight of the Islanders was playing for the Anaheim Ducks. And Mickey Callaway of the Mets was running out the string of his playing career, in Korea.

In North American sports, the defending World Champions were the Spurs -- San Antonio, not Tottenham -- the New York Giants, the Boston Red Sox *, the Anaheim Ducks, and the Houston Dynamo were the holders of the MLS Cup. The Heavyweight Champion of the World, depending on who you believe, was either Ruslan Chagaev (recognized by the WBA), Oleg Maskaev (WBC), or Wladimir Klitschko (IBF).

The Olympic Games have since been held in Britain, Canada, China and Russia. The World Cup has since been held in South Africa. And both have since been held in Brazil.

Same-sex marriage was legal in the following countries: The Netherlands, Belgium, Spain, Canada, Israel, South Africa; in the U.S. States of Massachusetts and Iowa.

The Mayor of London was Ken Livingstone. The Prime Minister was Gordon Brown. The current holders of those offices, Sadiq Khan and Theresa May, respectively, were both then serving in the House of Commons. Queen Elizabeth II was the monarch -- that hasn't changed.

The President of the United States was George W. Bush. Barack Obama was running to replace him. The idea that Donald Trump could become President, or that any President would do the things he's done, and say the things he's said, was ridiculous -- and should have stayed that way.

The Governor of New York was Eliot Spitzer -- for another 22 days. Andrew Cuomo was then his Attorney General. The Mayor of New York was Michael Bloomberg. Bill de Blasio was on the City Council. The Governor of New Jersey was Jon Corzine. Phil Murphy was National Finance Chair of the Democratic National Committee.

The Pope was Benedict XVI. The current Pope, Francis, was then Cardinal Jorge Mario Bergoglio, Archbishop of Buenos Aires. The Prime Minister of Canada was Stephen Harper. The holder of the Nobel Peace Prize was former Vice President Al Gore, for his work to stop the ill effects of climate change -- which is one of several examples of the Nobel Committee showing the need for separate awards for Peace and Humanitarianism. While Gore certainly deserved an award, what he got this one for had nothing to do with either preventing or stopping a war. There have since been 3 Presidents of the United States, 3 Prime Ministers of Britain, and 2 Popes.

There were still living veterans of World War I; the subsequent civil wars in Germany, Poland, Russia and Finland; the Mexican Revolution, the Turkish War of Independence, Mussolini's March On Rome, and the Brazilian Revolution. There were still living people who had survived the sinkings of the RMS Titanic, the RMS Lusitania, the SS Morro Castle, the SS Eastland, the USS Panay, the HMS Hood and the USS Juneau.

All 7 of J.K. Rowling's Harry Potter books had been published, but only the 1st 5 films had been made. Later in the year, Suzanne Collins would publish The Hunger Games. George R.R. Martin had published the 1st 4 A Song of Ice and Fire books, but Game of Thrones had yet to debut on television. Same with The Walking Dead, which had, at that point, only existed in comic book form.

Films premiering in the late Winter of 2008 included Cloverfield, Mad Money, The Other Boleyn Girl, Will Ferrell's 1970s basketball film Semi-Pro, and (what will hopefully be) the last Rambo film. Daniel Craig was James Bond, Brandon Routh was Superman, Christian Bale was Batman, and David Tennant was The Doctor.

Girlfriends aired its last first-run episode. Keeping Up with the Kardashians, Breaking Bad and Terminator: The Sarah Connor Chronicles had recently debuted. No one had yet heard of Richard Castle. The Number 1 song in America was "Low" by Flo Rida (Tramar Lacel Dillard) and T-Pain (Faheem Rashad Najm). Michael Jackson was still alive.

Inflation was such that what $1.00 bought then, $1.17 would buy now -- or, more to the point of the country in question, £1.00 then is about £1.27 now. A U.S. postage stamp cost 41 cents, and a New York Subway ride $2.00. The average price of a gallon of gas was $3.32, a cup of coffee $2.45, a McDonald's meal (Big Mac, fries, shake) $6.39, a movie ticket $7.20, a new car $23,429, and a new house $290,400. The Dow Jones Industrial Average closed the preceding Friday at 12,381.02.

The tallest building in the world was Taipei 101 in Taiwan. The age of social media was well underway, but, as yet, there was no Pinterest, no Instagram, no Vine, and no iPad. Sony PS3 and Wii were battling it out to be the leading home video game system.

In the Winter of 2008, Cyprus and Malta adopted the euro as their currency. The Kivu conflict in the Democratic Republic of the Congo was ended by a peace deal. Iran launched its 1st rocket into space; 10 years later, they have not yet had any manned missions. Kosovo declared independence from Serbia. Prime Minister Kevin Rudd of Australia issued a formal apology to the Stolen Generations, Aboriginal children taken from their families to be raised "white" for much of the 20th Century.

And the subprime mortgage crisis resulted in stock markets around the world crashing on January 21, and again on February 5. The Great Recession was underway, but few people suspected that it would get as bad as it did later in the year. Indeed, at this point in the 2008 Presidential election, both the Republican candidates, led by Senator John McCain of Arizona, and the Democratic candidates, led by Senators Hillary Clinton of New York and Barack Obama of Illinois, had foreign policy matters, especially the ridiculous Iraq War, as their main focus.

Mount Everest conqueror Sir Edmund Hillary, and chess legend turned conspiracy theorist Bobby Fischer, and 1950s FA Cup hero Jimmy Dugdale died.

Few people born by February 24, 2008 have yet become famous, but Louis Tomlinson and Taylor Lautner were 16 years old; John Boyega, Daisy Ridley, Jack Gleeson, Cole Sprouse, Dylan Sprouse, Selena Gomez, Demi Lovato, Miley Cyrus, Zayn Malik, Hallie Eisenberg, Cara Delevingne and Ezra Miller were 15; Ariana Grande, Debby Ryan, Ally Brooke, Liam Payne, Niall Horan, Molly Quinn, Harry Styles and Dakota Fanning were 14, and Justin Bieber was just short of turning 14; Saoirse Ronan and Halsey were 13; Sophie Turner, Gigi Hadid, Kendall Jenner and Sasha Pieterse were 12; Tom Holland, Abigail Breslin, Katherine Langford, Normani Kordei, Lauren Jauregi, Lorde, Zendaya, Bella Hadid, Dylan Minnette and Hailee Steinfeld were 11, and Camila Cabello was about to turn 11; Maisie Williams, Dean-Charles Chapman, Dinah Jane, Kylie Jenner, Bella Thorne, Ariel Winter and the McCaughey Septuplets were 10.

Jaden Smith, Rico Rodriguez and Nolan Gould were 9; Noah Cyrus was 8; Jackie Evancho, Dylan Douglas, Frankie Jonas and Willow Smith were 7; Maddox Joliet-Pitt and Rowan Blanchard were 6; Carys Douglas and Quvenzhané Wallis were 4; and Aubrey Anderson-Emmons was 8 months old.

February 24, 2008. Tottenham Hotspur won a trophy, the Football League Cup, then known as the Carling Cup, defeating Chelsea 2-1 at Wembley Stadium.

It has been exactly 10 years since that day. Since then, Tottenham have never won another trophy, while arch-rivals Arsenal have won 3 FA Cups, are in the League Cup Final tomorrow, and have advanced to the Round of 16 in the UEFA Europa League.

Of course, "Spurs" have advanced to the last 16 of this year's Champions League, and the 5th Round of this year's FA Cup.  Theoretically, both clubs would win up to 2 trophies this season.

But who's kidding who? It's Tottenham. Surely, the chant will go up: "It's happened again, it's happened again, Tottenham Hotspur, it's happened again!"

Tottenham are the biggest joke franchise in sports -- any sport, any country. Here's a joke:

A mistake was made, and a game against Tottenham was scheduled for the same day that Arsenal were away in the Champions League. Arsène Wenger tells his players, "Boys, go, and leave Tottenham to me. I will play them all by myself."

So the team goes to the Continent, and, at halftime, they check their phones, and see: "HT: Tottenham 0-1 Arsenal, Arsène Wenger 10'." That gives them the boost they need, and they win their game. But when they're done, they see "FT: Tottenham 1-1 Arsenal, Arsène Wenger 10', Aaron Lennon 90'+4."

The Gunners get back home, and they see Wenger, still in his kit, sitting on a bench, head in his hands. He looks up, and says, "Boys, I let you down." They say, "What are you talking about? You held them off for 93 minutes, all by yourself. Even at the end, they only managed a draw. You even scored in the 10th minute."

"Yes," Wenger says, "but I got sent off in the 12th."

Tottenham: A joke forever.