To paraphrase the former opening sequence of my favorite TV show, Castle:
There are two kinds of folks who don't love the FA Cup: Psychopaths, and people who've never heard of it.
I freakin' love the FA Cup.
Though that doesn't necessarily keep one out of the first category, that of "psychopath."
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For those of you who fall into the second category:
The FA Cup is the Football Association Cup, an annual tournament run by The Football Association, the governing body for soccer in England -- with a few teams in Wales participating.
There is also a Football Association of Wales, FAW, that runs the Welsh Cup, in which 2 English teams, close to the England-Wales "border," participate. Are you following me so far?
No teams from Scotland or either of the Irelands -- the Republic (Dublin), or Northern Ireland (Belfast) -- are eligible. Teams from the Channel Islands, the Isle of Wight, and the Isle of Man are, as they are technically part of "England."
This season, 737 soccer teams -- sorry, forgot to speak English there, football clubs -- participated. England's soccer structure is as follows:
1. Premier League, 20 teams (until 1992, named the Football League Division One)
2. The Championship, 24 teams (formerly the Football League Division Two)
3. Football League One, 24 teams (formerly the Football League Division Three)
4. Football League Two, 24 teams (formerly the Football League Division Four)
5. Conference Premier, 24 teams
6. Conference North and Conference South, 22 teams each
7. Three separate leagues of 24 teams each: Northern Premier League Premier Division, Southern Football League Premier Division, Isthmian League Premier Division
8. Six separate leagues: Northern Premier League Division One North (22 teams), Northern Premier League Division One South, Southern Football League Division One Central, Southern Football League Division One South & West, Isthmian League Division One North, and Isthmian League Division One South (24 teams in the two Isthmian divisions, 22 in each of the others)
9. Fourteen separate leagues, averaging 22 teams per
10. Seventeen separate leagues, averaging 20 teams per
And so on, down to a 24th division. Based on performance, teams can move up a division (unless they're already in the Premier League) or down one at the end of the season.
In England, going to games at the grounds of all 92 teams in the Football League -- the top 4 divisions, even though the Premier League is considered separate from the Football League -- a.k.a. "Doing the 92," is the equivalent of Americans seeing games at all 30 Major League Baseball parks. It is possible to do all 92 in one season, given enough money, due to the length of the season, from mid-August to mid-May. But, for most people, "Doing the 92" is a lifetime goal.
Teams in the Premier League (1st division) get an automatic bye to the FA Cup's 3rd Round Proper. Teams in the Championship get an automatic bye to the 2nd Round Proper. Teams in League One and League Two get an automatic by to the 1st Round Proper.
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Before the start of every round -- usually, the day after the end of the previous round -- balls are pulled out of a hopper, lottery style, to determine who plays who, and where. If a game ends in a draw after the requisite 90 minutes plus stoppage time, a replay is held a few days later at the other team's ground.
Until 1993, replays could be endless: In 1979, in the 3rd Round Proper, Arsenal, the North London club I support, and Sheffield Wednesday, of West Yorkshire, had to play 5 times, going to a 4th Replay, before Arsenal finally won. They played on January 6 (a 1-1 draw at Hillsborough Stadium in Sheffield), 9 (a 2-2 draw at Arsenal Stadium, a.k.a. Highbury, in North London), 15 (2-2 at Filbert Street in Leicester), 17 (3-3, also at Leicester) and 22 (Arsenal finally winning 2-0, yet again at Leicester, inspiring a perennial Arsenal song).
Arsenal ended up winning the Cup that year. (Arsenal also won last season, making it 3 of the last 4. That's their manager, Arsène Wenger, hoisting the trophy in the photo above.) To make matters worse, the following season, 1980, they needed 3 replays to get past Liverpool in the Semifinal, while simultaneously playing League games and games in the European Cup Winners' Cup. Now, if the replay also ends in a draw, it goes to extra time. If the score is still level, a penalty shootout is held.
The first round of any kind, held on the past weekend of August 5, was the Extra Preliminary Round, reducing the number of participating teams from 736 to 552. The Preliminary Round, held on the weekend of August 19, dropped it to 392. The 1st Round Qualifying, held the weekend of September 2, dropped it to 276. The 2nd Round Qualifying, held the weekend of September 16, dropped it to 196. The 3rd Round Qualifying, held the weekend of September 30, dropped it to 156. The 4th Round Qualifying, held the weekend of October 14, dropped it to 124.
The 1st Round Proper was held on the weekend of November 3, leaving 80 teams still eligible at the end. Hyde United (of Greater Manchester) and Heybridge Swifts (of Essex) were the lowest remaining teams, both in the 8th division.
The 2nd Round was played on the weekend of December 2, dropping the total of remaining eligible teams to 64. There were 3 teams from the 7th division who had survived the 1st Round, and were still in it: Hereford United, Leatherhead (yes, that's the name of a real team, in Surrey) and Slough Town (also real, in Berkshire).
Then comes the big day, the 1st Saturday in January (unless New Year's Day falls on a Friday, Saturday or Sunday): FA Cup Third Round Day (or, rather, weekend). The Premier League teams are now in it, and it becomes like the opening weekend of the NCAA Men's Division I Basketball Tournament, a.k.a. "March Madness" -- except this English madness goes on all year long (except in the summer, and the men who play the games actually get paid.
It comes again and again. There's always another season. You lose the Cup Final in May? Well, there's the 3rd Round to look forward to in January. What's wrong with that? It's actually rather comforting, when you think of it.
-- Nick Hornby, Fever Pitch
The 3rd Round Proper will be played this coming weekend: 2 games tomorrow, Friday, January 5; 4 games on Sunday, January 7; 1 game on Monday, January 8; and the other 25 on Saturday, January 6. The highest remaining teams are all in the 4th division, League Two: Stevenage of Hertfordshire, Luton Town of Bedfordshire, Coventry City of the West Midlands, Yeovil Town of Somerset, Exeter City of Devon, Wycombe Wanderers of Buckinghamshire, and Notts County and Mansfield Town of Nottinghamshire.
And, like March Madness, the FA Cup is known for "giant killings." A team that pulls an upset, or has a miraculous moment to win, experiences "the Magic of the FA Cup." A team that loses, especially in dramatic fashion, has "crashed out of the cup." Higher-ranked teams are known as "giants," lower-ranked teams as "minnows," and upsets as "cup shocks." And then there's the old joke:
Q: What's the difference between (name of team you don't like) and a teabag?
A: The teabag stays in the cup longer.
If you don't love the FA Cup, check your pulse, because you might well be dead.
The British TV networks now dictate when games, both League and Cup, will be played. The traditional 3:00 PM Saturday start still happens, if your team isn't big enough to get big ratings. The Friday night games will be Liverpool against Everton, their neighbors (just 1 mile away), in a "Merseyside Derby"; and Manchester United against Derby County. Derby won 2 League titles in the 1970s, but have struggled since. This game is in prime time because of Man U, long dueling with Liverpool for the right to be called England's greatest football club.
The big Saturday games will feature West London's Chelsea, the defending Premier League Champions, visiting Norwich City of Norfolk; and Manchester City, currently running away with the Premier League, hosting Lancashire side Burnley, who have done surprisingly well this season. A Burnley win here would be an upset, but not that big of an upset.
Arsenal will visit Nottingham to take on Nottingham Forest on the Sunday. In the late 1970s and early 1980s, Forest were one of the top teams in the world. They have since fallen to the 2nd division and never returned, so a win here would be big for them.
Also on Sunday, Arsenal's North London arch-rivals, Tottenham Hotspur, will host another London team, AFC Wimbledon. The Monday game will be a matchup that, geographically, doesn't make sense as a rivalry or "derby," but is one, anyway: Brighton & Hove Albion, of Sussex, hosts Crystal Palace, of South London.
The 32 teams that survive the 3rd Round Proper will play in the 4th Round, on the weekend of January 27. The 16 survivors of that will play in the 5th Round, on the weekend of February 17. That will get it down to 8, for the 6th Round (usually not called "the Quarterfinals") on the weekend of March 17. The Semifinals have traditionally been held at neutral sites, and since the 2007 opening of the new Wembley Stadium in London, they've been held there, and will be again, on April 21 and 22. The Final will be held at Wembley on May 19.
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