Tuesday, May 31, 2011

Yanks Get A's, Especially Colon; NBA & NHL Finals Hopes

If the world had worked out the way I'd hoped, yesterday, my son would not have asked me, "Dad, what's a complete game?" Because he'd know, because managers wouldn't treat pitchers like babies, and would let a man who is cruising finish the job.

Alas, the world did not work out the way I'd hoped: Republicans have won elections, the Red Sox have won 2 World Series and didn't get caught cheating until years afterward, I have no children, and if I did, they'd have to ask, "Dad, what's a complete game?"

Yesterday, at Overstock.com Coliseum (formerly the Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum), Yankee manager Joe Girardi let Bartolo Colon pitch a complete game, a 4-hit shutout, buoyed by a 1st-inning homer by Mark Teixeira (his 16th), and the Yankees beat the Oakland Athletics, 5-0.

I have, however, seen 2 sources call Colon's game a "gem." This is incorrect: While a 4-hit shutout is great, a "gem" is a no-hitter, not just a shutout.

Nevertheless, he gets a grade of A for the way he stopped the, well, the A's.

WP: Colon (3-3). LP: Trevor Cahill (6-3).

Even better, the Red Sox also lost, so the Yankees are once again tied for 1st place in the American League Eastern Division, a game ahead of The Scum in the All-Important Loss Column. And 2 (1 1/2) ahead of the Tampa Bay Rays, 2 (3) ahead of the Toronto Blue Jays, and 5 (5) ahead of the Baltimore Orioles, who are no longer looking like Buck Showalter is working magic on them.

Yesterday was a Memorial Day matineee, and tomorrow is a getaway day matinee. Tonight, however, will be one of those on-the-coast 10:05 PM starts that we love so much. :rolleyes: Freddy Garcia vs. Brett Anderson.

Jeter hits 2981 19
Rivera saves 572 29
A-Rod homers 622 141
A-Rod hits 2723 277
Magic Number 109 (to eliminate Scum and Rays, 107 for Jays, 106 for O's... feels good to be able to post the Magic Number again!)

*

Jim Tressel resigned as head coach of The... Ohio State University football team. Apparently, something fishy was going on, and he knew about it, and he didn't report it, and the school's 2nd-greatest coach ever behind Woody Hayes, who restored their pride after years of being humiliated by arch-rival Michigan, is out, possibly as a result of a plea-bargain to avoid a particularly harsh punishment on OSU.

We all should've known something was up in January 2003 when, coming off a National Championship, the Maurice Clarett situation got out of control. But it was one of those times when a great story meant that a lot of us chose to look the other way.

Here's hoping the Dallas Mavericks beat the Miami Heat in the NBA Finals, as they couldn't in 2006. I normally root against Dallas teams (actually, against Texas teams in general), but I like Mavs owner Mark Cuban (who, unlike John McCain and Sarah Palin, is, truly, a maverick), and LeBron James must be punished.

I also want to punish the Boston Bruins in the Stanley Cup Finals. Like all New England teams, they can't win without cheating. Unlike the Red Sox, Patriots and UConn men, but like the Celtics and the UConn women, we haven't yet figured out HOW they're cheating, but we know they are.

True, the Bruins haven't won the Stanley Cup since 1972, but their opponents, the Vancouver Canucks, haven't won it ever, and they've been playing since 1970. The last team from their city to win it was the Vancouver Millionaires. In 1915. That's 96 years.

Maybe I should do "How Long It's Been" features for both teams. (UPDATE: I did.)

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