John Sterling, 1938-2026

Like George Steinbrenner, but not like George M. Cohan, who was actually born on a July 3, John Sterling was, to borrow Cohan's words, "a real live nephew of my Uncle Sam, born on the 4th of July."

Unlike Steinbrenner, on the day that John Sterling, under the name John Sloss, was born in Manhattan, July 4, 1938, the New York Yankees were in first place -- or, at least, tied for it, with the Cleveland Indians. They went on to win the World Series that season.

John grew up on the Upper East Side, and attended Moravian College in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania; Boston University, and Columbia University in Manhattan, before leaving school to work at a small radio station in Wellsville, New York, in Alleghany County in the State's Southern Tier. Like many Jewish broadcasters, he changed his name to ward off anti-Semitism, becoming "John Sterling," choosing the name because it sounded like he could "shine."

In 1970, he moved to Baltimore, broadcasting for the NBA's Baltimore Bullets, who reached the NBA Finals in his 1st season with them. He also broadcast football games for Morgan State University, a historically black school in Baltimore.

He returned to New York, and hosted a sports-talk show on radio station WMCA, 570 on the AM dial. He broadcast basketball for the ABA's New York Nets, remaining with the for a while after they joined the NBA and then moved to New Jersey. He broadcast hockey for the NHL's New York Islanders and the WHA's New York Raiders, and football for the World Football League's New York Stars.

In 1981, he moved to Atlanta, hired by Turner Sports to broadcast for baseball's Braves and the NBA's Hawks. On July 4, 1985, the Braves played the Mets at Atlanta-Fulton County Stadium. Braves owner Ted Turner scheduled a postgame 4th of July fireworks show. But the game was delayed by rain, and didn't start until 9:04 PM. And it went to extra innings. A lot of extra innings.

In the top of the 18th inning, the Mets took an 11-10 lead. The only pitchers the Braves had left were 3 starters and the current reliever, Rick Camp. With 2 outs in the bottom of the 18th, there was no player left to pinch-hit for Camp, except for the 3 starting pitchers. He came into that game 10-for-168 for his career -- a lifetime batting average of .060. 

Sterling turned to his broadcast partner, Ernie Johnson -- who pitched for the Braves in Milwaukee and was the father of basketball announcer Ernie Johnson Jr. -- and said, "I'll tell you, Ernie: If hits a home run to tie this game, this game will be certified as absolutely the nuttiest in the history of baseball."

I was 15 years old, and watched this game on WOR-Channel 9, but, because of Sterling's call, it's the TBS version that seems to have been preserved for posterity and shown on highlights. Here's what Sterling said:

And he hits it to deep left! Heep goes back! It is... GONE! Holy cow! Oh my goodness! I don't believe it! I don't believe it! Rick Camp! Rick Camp! I told you Ernie, if he hits it out... That certifies this game as the wildest, wackiest, most improbable game in history!

But the Mets took a 16-11 lead in the top of the 19th. In the bottom of the 19th, the Braves closed to 16-13, had 2 men on, and Camp came up again. This time, Met starter Ron Darling, who had come on as an emergency reliever, struck Camp out to end it.

In 1989, Sterling came back to New York, as the radio voice of the Yankees, on 770 WABC until 2001, on 880 WCBS from 2002 to 2013, and on WFAN from 2014 until his retirement in 2024. In 1989 and '90, his partner was former outfielder (including for the Yankees) Jay Johnstone. In 1991, it was Joe Angel, who became better known later as an announcer for the Baltimore Orioles.

In 1992, he teamed with Daily News baseball columnist Michael Kay. The pair split in 2002, when the YES Network was founded, and Kay became their lead announcer, although the pair still teamed up to do the introductions every Old-Timers Day. Kay was replaced as Sterling's partner by Charley Steiner, now better known as a Los Angeles Dodgers announcer. And in 2005, Steiner was replaced by WFAN announcer Suzyn Waldman.

Like legendary Yankee announcers Mel Allen (1939-64) and Phil Rizzuto (1957-96), John Sterling was a "homer." He was not objective, supporting the Yankees throughout his 36-season tenure, longer than any Yankee announcer so far, except Rizzuto. And, like Mel and Phil, he made no apologies for it.

When something unusual happened on the field, he would turn to Waldman and say, "You know, Suzyn, you just can't predict baseball." In fact, baseball is among the more predictable sports.

For example, when a Yankee player hit a long drive, you had a 50-50 chance of correctly guessing that Sterling would guess wrong. Like Allen and Rizzuto, he tended to watch the ball, not the outfielder. In contrast, Red Barber, who broadcast for the Brooklyn Dodgers from 1939 to 1953, before coming to the Yankees and staying through 1966, told would-be announcers to watch the outfielder: If he looks like he thinks he can catch the ball, don't act like it's going to be a home run.

And so, Sterling would go into his home run call: "Swung on, and there it goes! Deep to left! That ball is high! It is far! It is... gone!" But, as so often happened, it would be, "It is high! It is far! It is... caught at the wall!" Or, "It is high! It is far! It is... off the wall!" One time, he said, "It is high! It is far! It is... a foul ball! Wow, Suzyn, that ball was gone!" No, it wasn't, it was foul!

Just as Allen tended to make up nicknames for Yankee players, Sterling would tailor home run calls around the hitter's name:

* Bernie Williams: "Bernie goes boom! Bern, baby, Bern!"

* Jorge Posada: "Jorgie juiced one!" (Instead of the seemingly obvious, "Hip, hip, Jorge!")

* Tino Martinez: "The Bam-tino!" (A play on one of Babe Ruth's nicknames, The Bambino.")

* Derek Jeter, after being named team Captain in 2003: "El Capitan!"

* Jason Giambi: "The Giambino!" (Same.)

* Alex Rodriguez: "It's an A-bomb for A-Rod!"

* Hideki Matsui, who was nicknamed Godzilla because he was from Japan: "It's a thrilla from Godzilla!"

* Robinson Canó: "Robbie Canó, doncha know!"

* Mark Teixeira: "Mark sends a Tex message! You're on the Mark, Teixeira!"

* Nick Swisher: "Positively Swish-a-licious!"

* Curtis Granderson: "The Grandy Man can!"

* Giancarlo Stanton: This one should have been obvious: "It's a Giac by Giancarlo!" Instead, he used “Giancarlo, non si può de stopparlo!” Sterling called a friend at the Berlitz Academy of Foreign Languages. Loosely translated from Italian, the call means, “You cannot be stopped!”

* Didi Gregorius: "Didi Gregorius makes Yankee fans euphorious!"

* Aaron Judge: "All rise! Here comes the judge!" (Reminding everyone of the "Here Come Da Judge" sketch on Laugh-In.)

* Gleyber Torres: "It's Gleyber Day! And like a good Gleyber, Torres is there!"

And two straight players hitting them "go back-to-back, and a-belly-to-belly!"

Let's be honest: Some of them were better than others.

On May 27, 1991, the Yankees were struggling, but came from behind to win a Memorial Day matinee against the hated Boston Red Sox, on a 3-run walkoff home run by Mel Hall. Sterling yelled, "Ballgame over! Yankees win! The Yankees win!"

He began using it after every game. By the time of the 1996 postseason run, the "The" had gotten stretched out: "The-uh-uh-uh-uh Yankees win!" The bigger the game, the longer the "The." At the end of a postseason series, he would mention it. "Ballgame over! World Series over! Yankees win! Theeeeeeeeeeee Yankees win!"

Eventually, a recording of it would be played by the Yankees' scoreboard operator, followed by Frank Sinatra's version of "Theme from New York, New York." In 2007, someone with a camera phone got a closeup of Sterling saying it, pumping his fists, shaking in his chair, and posted it on YouTube, calling it "The Sterling Shake."

Sterling was typical of Yankee figures: People who loved the Yankees loved him, and loved his whole shtick; people who hated the Yankees thought he was dumb and annoying.

He was not dumb. And the only time when he was annoying was when he went into "It is high! It is far... " and it turned out not to be gone.

When the YES Network was founded in 2002, Sterling became the host and narrator for its Yankeeography series. He also hosted the Yankees Classics series, including many games that he had broadcast himself. He won 16 Sports Emmy Awards, including 2 for Yankeeography.

He lived with his wife, Jennifer, in Teaneck, Bergen County, not far from the George Washington Bridge and The Stadium, until they divorced. They had 4 children. He then moved into The Avalon at Edgewater, overlooking the Hudson River, with a view of The Stadium. He lost that apartment in a fire in 2015, but found a new apartment in Edgewater.

His 1st game with the Yankees was on April 4, 1989, a 4-2 win over the Minnesota Twins at the Metrodome in Minneapolis. On October 19, 2019, he broadcast Game 6 of the American League Championship Series, a 6-4 loss to the Houston Astros at Minute Maid Park (now Daikin Park) in Houston. It was the game where Jose Altuve hit a Pennant-winning home run, and then yelled at his teammates not to rip his shirt open. In between, over 31 seasons and 5,060 games, John Sterling broadcast every Yankee game.

This included every single game in the careers of Derek Jeter and Mariano Rivera; the 3,000th hits of Jeter and Alex Rodriguez; A-Rod's 400th, 500th and 600th career home runs; Rivera's record-breaking 602nd save; the perfect games of David Wells, David Cone and Domingo Germán, and the no-hitters of Jim Abbott, Dwight Gooden and Corey Kluber; the Opening Series in Japan in 2004; the London Series in 2019; the last game at the old Yankee Stadium in 2008; the 1st game at the new Yankee Stadium in 2009; the AL Wild Card Game in 2015, '17, '18 and '21; the AL Wild Card Series in 2020; the AL Division Series in 1995, '96, '97, '98, '99, 2000, '01, '02, '03, '04, '05, '06, '07, '09, '10, '11, '12, '17, '18, '19, '20 and '22; the AL Championship Series in 1996, '98, '99, 2000, '01, '03, '04, '09, '10, '12, '17, '19 and '22; and the World Series in 1996, '98, '99, 2000, '01, '03 and '09.

But advancing age and heart trouble were taking their toll. He missed games in the COVID-shortened season of 2020. He was making more mistakes. On June 10, 2023, while broadcasting a game against the Red Sox at Yankee Stadium, he was hit in the head by a foul ball off the bat of Justin Turner. He stayed in the game.

On April 14, 2024, he called the Yankees' 8-7 loss to the Cleveland Guardians at Progressive Field in Cleveland. It was his 5,651st game for the Yankees, counting the postseason. The next day, arriving back in New York, he announced his retirement, effective immediately. It appears he left on his own terms. He said:

I am a very blessed human being. I have been able to do what I wanted, broadcasting for 64 years. As a little boy growing up in New York as a Yankees fan, I was able to broadcast the Yankees for 36 years. It's all to my benefit, and I leave very, very happy.

The Yankees won the Pennant in 2024, and he was invited back to broadcast an inning of the World Series, which the Yankees lost to the Los Angeles Dodgers.

John Sterling died today, May 4, 2026, at Englewood Hospital in Englewood, Bergen County, New Jersey, from longstanding heart trouble. He was 87 years old, 2 months short of his 88th birthday.

And the New York Yankees are in first place. Cliché Alert: He would have wanted it that way.

He is... gone. But he will never leave us.

UPDATE: That night, before the game, a pregame ceremony was held. Highlights of John's calls were played on the big screen behind center field, and Michael Kay and Suzyn Waldman walked out together and laid bouquets of flowers on home plate.

Ed Kranepool, 1944-2024

When my mother was a teenager, she had a crush on Ed Kranepool, because he was the 1st player from her generation to make it to Major League Baseball, and with a local team, no less.

Yes, the '62 Mets counted as "major league."

Edward Emil Kranepool was born on November 8, 1944 in Manhattan, and grew up in The Bronx. A baseball star at James Monroe High School, the school's biggest since Hank Greenberg, and no Major League Baseball Draft then being in place, Ed Kranepool was fair game. The Bronx-based New York Yankees decided they didn't need him, so the New York Mets snapped him up.

He made his major league debut, still 17 years old, on September 22, 1962, at the Polo Grounds. In the top of the 7th inning, wearing Number 21, he replaced Gil Hodges at 1st base, and grounded out to 2nd batting against Paul Toth in the bottom of the 8th. The Mets lost to the Chicago Cubs, 9-2.

He played mostly right field, and some 1st base, in 1963, but he'd been brought up too soon. He was sent down to Triple-A. He still couldn't hit, and was sent all the way back down to Class D (what we would now call the Rookie League.) A banner appeared at the Polo Grounds, mocking the not-yet-19-year-old: "IS KRANEPOOL OVER THE HILL?"

On May 30, 1964, he played all 18 innings of a doubleheader with the Buffalo Bisons, when the Mets called him back up. At brand-new Shea Stadium, they played a doubleheader against the San Francisco Giants, and the nightcap went 23 innings. Ed Kranepool played 50 innings in 2 days. But he was up for good: Having been given Number 7, he made the National League All-Star Team in 1965 (only 20 years old), and was a member of the Mets' 1969 "Miracle" World Championship, managed by Hodges, and their 1973 National League Pennant, managed by Yogi Berra.

Later in his career, he did commercials for Gillette Foamy shaving cream. One ad began with him repeatedly striking out on black-and-white film, and the announcer, possibly Met broadcaster Bob Murphy (the ad isn't on YouTube, and I'm working on memory here), said, "From 1962 to 1970, Ed Kranepool batted .227."

The ad then shows him lathering up with Foamy; then, with some symbolism, switches the film to color, and shows him slicing a line drive down the right field line for a double: "Since 1971, Ed's batted .283! What do you think of that, Ed?"

The ad plays on ballplayers' tendency toward superstition, and shows Ed, in the dugout, in full uniform but lathered up, holding a can of Foamy, saying, "I don't know, but now, I shave every other inning."

God only knows why he really started hitting better at age 26. But the stats were a bit off: From 1962 to 1970, his batting average was actually .246; from 1971 to 1978, .281. The closing narration was, "Foamy: More than thick and rich enough for New York's heavy hitters." He was never a heavy hitter: His peaks were 16 home runs in 1966, and 58 RBIs in 1971.

He played his last game on September 30, 1979, shortly before turning 35, with a .261 lifetime batting average, and 1,418 career hits, a club record until surpassed by David Wright. He was the last remaining '62 Met, and his 1,853 games and 16 seasons in a Met uniform remain team records. He was elected to the Mets Hall of Fame, became a stockbroker, making enough money to live in tony Old Westbury, Long Island.

But he developed diabetes, and had a toe amputated. In 2019, he received a kidney transplant. It bought him 5 years, and allowed him to attend the 50th Anniversary reunion of the 1969 World Champions. He had attended the other major anniversary reunions, as well as the 2008 closing of Shea Stadium, the 2009 opening of Citi Field, and the Mets' 50th Anniversary celebration in 2012.

On May 30, 2018, on The Michael Kay Show on ESPN radio, Kay's co-host, Don La Greca, a Met fan, ripped Mets management for letting their great players get away, from Tom Seaver and Darryl Strawberry to more recent players like Jacob deGrom; and lamented on players whose careers got sidetracked by injuries, such as David Wright. He went on an epic rant, saying, "Who is your forever player? Ed Kranepool?"

Ed Kranepool died of a heart attack yesterday, September 8, 2024, in Boca Raton, Florida. He was 2 months short of his 80th birthday.

With his death, there are 8 members of the original 1962 New York Mets: Craig Anderson, Galen Cisco, Cliff Cook, John DeMerit, Rick Herrscher, Jay Hook, Félix Mantilla and Jim Marshall. And there are 15 surviving players from the 1969 World Champion New York Mets: Nolan Ryan, Jerry Koosman, Gary Gentry, Wayne Garrett, Cleon Jones, Ron Swoboda, Art Shamsky, Al Weis, Ken Boswell, Ron Taylor, Bobby Pfeil, J.C. Martin, Duffy Dyer, Rod Gaspar and Jack DiLauro.

Are the Rays Cheating? It's Not Necessary vs. the Yankees

Yesterday, on radio station WFAN, Evan Roberts made the claim that the Tampa Bay Rays' amazing start -- 13-0, now 30-9 -- is due to cheating:

"There's something suspicious about that, by the way," Roberts said of the Rays' start. "All I know is, I'm a baseball fan. I know baseball. I like baseball. I was very skeptical with what I saw this weekend."

Roberts is a Met fan. He admitted, "I have no evidence" of the Rays cheating, but pointed to the number of players on their roster who are outperforming their baseball card: "Christian Bethancourt: Hello? Taylor Walls, what?"

Bethancourt is a 31-year-old catcher, who has already hit 6 home runs, when he hit 11 last season, topping a previous season-high of 6. Walls is a former top prospect who has improved which is understandable, since he batted just .172, with 8 home runs and 33 RBIs in 142 games. But he was already 25 years old. Most guys who are that undeveloped at 25 aren't going to pan out. Walls is now batting .261 with 6 homers and 13 RBIs.

Roberts continued, comparing the situation to The Athletic, in 2019, breaking the story of the Houston Astros' cheating:

You know what most of us do? We don't know who they are, so we just say, "The Rays are brilliant." Here's the problem: I know who they are. They're not good. The Rays are 19-3 at home? Hello? Are you gonna wake up when the article’s written in The Athletic, or are you gonna wake up now? Sometimes, you don't need evidence. Sometimes, you gotta say, "What I'm watching doesn't make sense." So I'll do it. I'm not a Yankee fan. I'm gonna raise my hand. Hey, ladies and gentlemen: What I'm seeing in Tampa makes no sense.

Look, we know that baseball teams cheat. The Astros have gotten caught. The Red Sox have gotten caught. Major League Baseball officials didn't care when the team getting hurt by the cheating was the Yankees. The only reason the Astros got punished as little as they were is that, in the 2017 World Series, the cheating hurt a team that MLB does like, the Los Angeles Dodgers.

In 2018, the Red Sox, having already been caught using Apple Watches to cheat, beat the Astros in the Playoffs. In 2021, the Astros beat the Red Sox in the Playoffs. No evidence of the Astros cheating in 2021 has yet surfaced, but, like the Red Sox, they have forfeited the presumption of innocence. If the proof is ever found, what then? Probably the same thing that happened to them after the 2017 proof was found: As the old saying goes, "Thirty lashes with a wet noodle."

Yes, the Rays are 19-3 at home. They are also 11-6 on the road. That's pretty strong. A reasonable person would conclude that, if they are cheating, it is not with a method that is tied in to their home stadium.

*

Anyway, coming off a sweep of the Oakland Disarr-A's, the Yankees had some momentum going into their home series with the high-flying Rays.

But Maurice "Mo" Mentum is a free agent, and he switched teams again.

Domingo Germán started for the Yankees last night, and he was fine for the 1st 4 innings, allowing 3 hits and 2 walks, but no runs. But the Yankees didn't score, either, as Drew Rasmussen allowed just 1 baserunner, a single by Jake Bauers in the 2nd inning.

And error by Anthony Rizzo at 1st base led to a Rays run in the 5th. They loaded the bases in the 6th, and Ron Marinaccio couldn't stop them from clearing the bases with a double. At 1-0, it was still game winnable; at 4-0, it was game over.

The Rays got another run in the 7th, and 3 more in the 8th. The Yankees still got nothing. Bauers hit another single in the 5th, and Harrison Bader was hit by a pitch in the 8th. (Don't worry, he wasn't injured again.) That HBP and the 2 Bauers singles were the Yankees' only baserunners over the 1st 8 innings.

Willie Calhoun led off the bottom of the 9th with a double. Anthony Volpe and Aaron Judge grounded out. But Rizzo and DJ LeMahieu drew walks to load the bases, so there was the slimmest of hope. Gleyber Torres singled Calhoun and Rizzo home. But it was somehow fitting that Bauers, the only offense the Yankees had previously had, ended it with a strikeout.

Rays 8, Yankees 2. WP: Rasmussen (4-2). No save. LP: Germán (2-3). The Yankees are 9 games behind the Rays, and we're not even halfway through May. I don't know if the Rays are cheating. I know that, whatever the Yankees are doing, legal and otherwise, isn't working. So the Rays don't need to cheat against them.

The series continues tonight. Gerrit Cole starts against Trevor Kelley.

And, last night, the New Jersey Devils' season came to an end, with a 3-2 loss to the Carolina Hurricanes in the NHL Eastern Conference Semifinals. It was their best season in 11 years. They made the Playoffs. They won a Playoff Round. They beat the arch-rival New York Rangers in so doing. The future looks bright.

For them. For the Yankees, to borrow a phrase that Muhammad Ali once used, the future is a mist.

Yankees Honor Mariano, Then Dishonor His Generation of Yankees

I'm still trying to catch up. From September 23:

On occasions like Old-Timers' Day or the retirement of a uniform number, the current players owe it to the former players to put up a good fight. Not necessarily to win, but to at least look like they're trying to win.

Yesterday was Mariano Rivera Day, the 1st "day" for a player at the new Yankee Stadium. The Yankees honored Mariano with the retirement of his uniform number 42, and the presentation of a few gifts. (Implicit in this is the eventual dedication of a Plaque in his honor at Monument Park, but they can't cast the Plaque until his career truly is over, and they have final statistics that they can put on it.)

On hand were many representatives of the 1996-2003 Yankee Dynasty: Joe Torre, Bernie Williams, Paul O'Neill, Jorge Posada, Tino Martinez, David Cone, John Wetteland, Jeff Nelson, Hideki Matsui. And, of course, the still-active Derek Jeter and yesterday's starting pitcher, the also-retiring Andy Pettitte.

Also on hand were members of the family of Jackie Robinson, for whom Number 42 was retired throughout baseball, with the provision that players then wearing it could continue to do so for the rest of their careers. And, 16 years later, Mariano is the last one. A Plaque was unveiled in Monument Park honoring Jackie, making him the 1st player who never played for the Yankees to be honored there.

(Jackie is, of course, a part of the history of the old Yankee Stadium, having played World Series games there for the Brooklyn Dodgers in 1947, '49, '52, '53, '55 and '56 -- most notably stealing home plate in Game 1 in '55.)

The opposing San Francisco Giants also presented Mo with a gift. Their pitching coach is Dave Righetti, who had been the Yankees' all-time saves leader until Mo surpassed him. "Rags" never won a Series with the Yankees (though he was a part of the 1981 Pennant as a rookie starter), but he's helped the Giants win 2 of the last 3 World Series. (They won't make the Playoffs this time.)
With all that talent on hand, you'd think the Yankees would have at least put up an effort.

*

Certainly, Pettitte did. He had a perfect game going until the 5th inning, before walking a batter, who was subsequently erased in a double play.

And then, on WCBS -- the Yankees have announced they'll be on WFAN next season -- John Sterling said the N-word.

No, not that N-word. Not the one that Jackie Robinson faced time and time again in his struggle first to integrate baseball, then to make it fully integrated, and later to make it more fair for those who integrated it. Sterling said, "Andy Pettitte has pitched a no-hitter through 5 innings."

It's one of "the unwritten rules of baseball" that you do not say the word "no-hitter" while one is in progress, because it will jinx the pitcher.  You can say, "He hasn't allowed any hits." Or, "He is pitching hitless baseball." Or, "No (member of the opposing team) has gotten a hit yet." Anything, so long as the word "no-hitter" is not used.

Author John Thorn, who's written a bunch of books about baseball and is now MLB's Official Historian, once wrote, "Strangely, the words 'perfect game' can be spoken without similar effect."

But Sterling said, "no-hitter."

I've heard broadcasters use the word plenty of times. When Andy Hawkins had one going for the Yankees against the Chicago White Sox in 1990, Phil Rizzuto used the word on WPIX-Channel 11 many times. Hawkins kept the no-hitter, but he walked a few batters, and errors by Mike Blowers at 3rd base, Jim Leyritz in left field (he was a rookie and had never played the position before) and Jesse Barfield (normally a great fielder but he lost the ball in the Comiskey Park sun) led to 4 ChiSox runs.

Hawkins pitched 8 innings -- with the home team winning, a bottom of the 9th was not necessary -- and allowed no hits, but lost, 4-0. A candidate for the title of "the strangest game I've ever seen," right up there with that 4th of July marathon the Mets played in Atlanta in 1985.

At least 5 times, on YES, Michael Kay has used the word "no-hitter" and jinxed a game. Usually, when something like that happens, it doesn't matter: The pitcher gives up a hit, and still wins. Sometimes, with help from the bullpen. But it usually only costs the pitcher's team the no-hitter, not the game.

This time, Sterling said, "Andy Pettitte has pitched a no-hitter through 5 innings." Naturally, in the 6th, Andy allowed a hit, and then a run.

That wouldn't have been a big deal, except it was only 1-0 Yankees at that point. Mark Reynolds, who drove the Yankees so crazy last year for the Baltimore Orioles and has been a good pickup this year, hit a home run.

Andy pitched into the 8th, but allowed the runner that would decide the game. Joe Girardi pulled him, and, to a standing ovation, left the mound at Yankee Stadium (either one) as an active pitcher for the last time. (Assuming he doesn't get injured, he has one more start this season, it's on the road, and he will not be pitching in the Playoffs. No current Yankee will.)

David Robertson couldn't prevent the run from scoring, and Girardi had to bring Mo in for a 5-out save. Bringing him in for more than a 3-out save is always a risk, as he has been damn near unhittable for 3 outs since 1997, but for more than that, he's had his troubles.

(It's why, when people call him "the greatest relief pitcher ever," you have to consider the guys in the pre-Dennis Eckersley days who pitched the last 2, 3, even 4 innings of games, including Yankee stars Joe Page, Luis Arroyo, Sparky Lyle and Goose Gossage.)

Mo got the 5 outs without making it any worse. But the Yankees didn't get the job done with the bats. Until Reynolds led off the 3rd with his homer, the Yankees had no baserunners. Ichiro Suzuki drew a 2-out walk that inning, but got caught stealing. Robinson Cano singled with 1 out in the 4th, but was stranded. Brendan Ryan doubled with 2 out in the 5th, but was stranded. With 2 out in the 6th, Cano singled and Alfonso Soriano walked, but Curtis Granderson struck out.

Eduardo Nunez led off the 7th with a single. Reynolds struck out. Ryan singled, but a reliever came in and struck out Vernon Wells and Ichiro.

Alex Rodriguez led off the 8th with a single, and Cano doubled pinch-runner Zoilo Almonte to 3rd. But Soriano grounded to 3rd, and Almonte was thrown out at home, leaving runners on 1st and 2nd with 1 out. Granderson struck out again. Nunez singled, but Cano tried to score and was thrown out at home. And the Yankees went out meekly, 1-2-3, in the bottom of the 9th.

Giants 2, Yankees 1. This is not the right way to honor Mariano. Indeed, it was as if an entire generation of Yankees had seen everything they worked for planted firmly in the past, with the present a mess and the future a mist.

*

So here is where Major League Baseball stands, with 1 week remaining in the regular season:

* The Boston Red Sox have clinched the American League East. The Oakland Athletics have clinched the AL West. The Detroit Tigers have a Magic Number of 2 to clinch the AL Central.

* If the current Wild Card standings hold, the Tampa Bay Rays will get the 1st AL berth, and the Cleveland Indians the 2nd. The Texas Rangers are a game and a half back, the Kansas City Royals 3 1/2, the Yankees 4, and the Baltimore Orioles 4 1/2.

* The Yankees' elimination number is 3: Any combination of Yankee losses and Cleveland wins adding up to 3, and the Yankees don't make the Playoffs, for only the 2nd time in the last 19 seasons. And since the Indians have 3 home games against the Chicago White Sox followed by 3 road games against the Minnesota Twins, who have already lost 94 and 90 games, respectively, and the Yankees still have to play 3 home games against the Rays before closing with 3 games at the Houston Astros (whose 105 losses are easily the most in the majors), it seems incredibly unlikely that the Yankees can make it. Even if the Indians do take a nosedive, the Rangers would also have to lose a good chunk of their last 7 games to give the Yankees a shot, and they're playing the hopeless Astros. So Yogi Berra can safely call Girardi and say, "It's over."

* The Atlanta Braves have clinched the National League East. The Los Angeles Dodgers have clinched the NL West. The St. Louis Cardinals have a Magic Number of 5 to clinch the NL Central, but the Cincinnati Reds and the Pittsburgh Pirates are both only 2 games back, so that race is hardly decided.

* The Reds and Pirates, in addition to still having a shot to overtake the Cardinals for the NL Central, currently hold the 2 NL Wild Card slots. The Washington Nationals are 5 games behind them, and are almost certainly out of it.

Oh well, my fellow Yankee Fans. We didn’t give it a good shot, and we lose Mariano and Andy, and we have the unresolved A-Rod situation, and rumors are running rampant that Jeter will only play one more year, due to his contract situation. And CC Sabathia and Hiroki Kuroda really tailed off. And we don't know if Ivan Nova can keep up his comeback. And we don't really have a 5th starter. And Robertson hasn't exactly looked like a worthy successor to Mariano the last couple of years. And, at least for the moment, we still have Phil Hughes, Joba Chamberlain and Boone Logan stinking up the bullpen.

And Joe Girardi refuses to throw out his binder, and with George Steinbrenner dead, it doesn’t look like he's about to be fired. And Kevin Long is still the hitting instructor. And Brian Cashman is still the general manager. And the hated Red Sox won the Division.

Not good.

Oh well, you've still got the New York Football Giants to root for, right?

Not really: As legendary WCBS-Channel 2 sportscaster Warner Wolf would say, "If you had the Giants and 37 points, you lost! Come on, give me a break!"

Dumbest Met Fan Ever

For much of my life, I've been saying that Met fans are dumb. I even wrote a song about it... with help from Billy Joel.

Okay, it's not completely fair, and it's not universal. There are many smart people who are also Met fans. My grandmother was a Met fan. George Plimpton was a Met fan. Roger Angell is a Met fan. Jerry Seinfeld, Susan Sarandon, Jon Stewart, these people are all very smart and all Met fans.

But this guy takes the cake, and burns down the bakery. He does no favors for any of the preceding.

I'll give him a pass on saying Darryl Strawberry was his favorite player from the 1969 team, instead of the 1986 team. That's easy enough to futz up. Although, if you're a fan of a team that has won only 2 World Series -- and there are 10 current teams that haven't won at least that many, 12 if you discount titles won before teams moved to their current cities -- you should be able to tell the 2 apart.

But Francesca roasts him. And the mook still never explained why the Mets are "a great franchise."

They're "magical"? What the hell does that mean? It seems like the magic hasn't been back for years.

They're "exciting"? Big deal: On any given day, any given sports team can be exciting. And I've seen plenty of games -- by the Mets, the Yankees, and many other teams in several sports -- that have produced exciting games that they have lost.

Surely, Game 7 of the 2006 NLCS, which the caller brought up (Francesa did not), was exciting, a 1-1 tie in the 9th preserved by Endy Chavez's catch, but ruined by Yadier Molina's homer and Carlos Beltran's called strikeout.

Game 6 of the 1999 NLCS, that back-and-forth game in Atlanta that ended with Kenny Rogers walking Andruw Jones to force home the Pennant-losing run, was one of the most exciting sporting events I've ever seen.

And Games 1 and 5 of the 2000 World Series, I don't think I've ever seen a sporting event that excited me as much as those 2, due to my love of the Yankees and my hatred for the Mets... and the Mets lost both of those, in rather dramatic fashion, to the Yankees.

"Exciting" does not necessarily bring with it "successful" -- or "great," which, as the caller seemed to be suggesting, was his point.

Look, as I said, on any given day, the Mets can be very exciting. I saw some very good games at Shea Stadium. I've seen 2 games at Citi Field, and both were good. (And both were Met wins, too, both with Mike Pelfrey pitching very well.)

But that doesn't make the Mets "a great franchise."

The Yankees had some legendary battles with the Kansas City Royals in the late Seventies and early Eighties, filled with dramatics, homers, fights, and even a little chicanery. Are the Royals are great franchise? Not for a generation.

Then there's the Philadelphia Phillies. Are they a great franchise? Today, that's an easy answer: Yes. But at the dawn of the 21st Century, when they were stuck at the Vet, with a new ballpark still only a plan, and a team that could best be described as Curt Schilling, Bobby Abreu, and 23 underachievers (Scott Rolen and Pat Burrell certainly were at the time), were the Phillies a great franchise then? Not by a long shot, and if anyone had predicted a Pennant for them within 10 years, they would have been laughed out of the room.

How about the Atlanta Braves, once thought of as the Mets' biggest rivals? Today, sure, they've got all those division titles, the 1995 World Championship, and the great TV contract with TBS. But 20 years ago, just before the 1991 season, when they were coming off a last-place finish and hadn't won a Pennant since 1958, when they were still in Milwaukee? What did they have then? No Pennants in Atlanta, a lousy stadium, a bunch of prospects but little hope, a nice TV contract and Ted Turner's money and ambition. That was it... for a little while longer. On Opening Day 1992, the Braves could have been called "a great franchise." Not on Opening Day 1991.

Look, it's possible that the moves the Mets made this offseason might make something special happen. As Joaquin Andujar used to say, baseball can be summed up in one word: "Youneverknow." And, within 9 months -- if the World Series goes to a Game 7, it will be on October 27, the 25th Anniversary of the Mets' last World Series win -- the Mets could, legitimately, again be called "a great franchise."

At the moment? That's more laughable than anything Seinfeld and Stewart have ever said.

No, not all Met fans are dumb. But that caller? Dumbest Met fan I've ever heard.

The Worst 31-0 Win Ever

Suppose your favorite college football team was opening the season at home. There was a lot of hope. There was a lot of hype. You were said to have a strong defense and the best returning quarterback in the conference. You had a genius coach, a great leader who had brought your program to the level it currently enjoys. And you had a packed, modern stadium with a lot of atmosphere.

Now, suppose, in this opening game, near the end of the first half, your team was winning just 3-0.

My team met that description on Thursday night. My team is Rutgers.

Must've been playing somebody tough, right? Virginia Tech, perhaps? If you had guessed that, you would have had the right State... but that's about it.

It was Norfolk State. This would be like the Yankees being just 1-0 ahead of the Lakewood BlueClaws after 4. Or Arsenal with a scoreless draw at halftime of an FA Cup game against United. Not Manchester, not West Ham, not Newcastle, not even Sheffield... Colchester United.

In 2007, Rutgers played Norfolk State at home -- like this one, basically a revenue boost for the visiting "historically black college" with the awesome band but not the football team, or the uniforms, to match -- and led only 3-0 after the 1st quarter, but scored 6 touchdowns in the 2nd to take a 45-0 halftime lead that eventually became a 59-0 win.

This time... a late San San Te field goal gave RU a 6-0 halftime lead. A couple of NSU special-teams foulups were gifts to the Scarlet Knights, and the RU defense was, unlike the offense, as good as advertised. Final score, Rutgers 31, Norfolk State 0.

RU Coach Greg Schiano usually has short hair. Makes it tough to pull your hair when your team doesn't play to its potential.

Norfolk State knew it had no chance... except, only 3 points down after 28 minutes, they had a chance. It vanished, but that's hardly their own fault.

The next game is a week from today, Saturday, September 11 (please, don't play ominous music), in Miami against Florida International. Shouldn't be too much trouble, right?

Then, 2 weeks later, North Carolina at home. They just had 15 players declared ineligible. That's what happens when you have Butch Davis as your head coach, as the University of Miami found out when he nearly wrecked that program. Still, Carolina should be a good test for Rutgers. Then a home game against Tulane, and the Raritanners should be 4-0 going into an ESPN Friday night game at home against Connecticut, who will be loaded for bear after losing that heartbreaker to Rutgers in East Hartford last season.

*

The Yankees beat the pesky Toronto Blue Jays yesterday, 7-3, and again today, 7-5. Ivan Nova struggled yesterday, but the bats bailed him out. I suspect he'll get another chance, because, today, Javier Vazquez was awful again. But, he, too, was bailed out by the Yankee offense.

The Mets lost today, and lost last night, to the Chicago Cubs. The night before, they won, but Steve "Schmoozer" Somers on WFAN provided me with a moment that had me turning Colorado Rockies purple with laughter.

Somers: "Jason is calling from Staten Island! Hello, Jason." (I can't remember if the guy's name was actually Jason. I think it was, so I'm listing him as "Jason" here.)

Jason: "Oh, Schmooze... "

He said it mournfully, like the weight of the world was on his Flushing Heathen shoulders. He then went on about how the Mets are more than one trade, more than one free agent signing, away from respectability.

Jason: "Schmooze, what are we going to do?"

Somers: "Suffer."

The Schmoozer didn't miss a beat, didn't bat an eye. "Suffer." The Schmoozer is a Met fan. He knows.

As he so often says, to the rhythm of Ernest Lawrence Thayer's "Casey at the Bat":

Oh, somewhere in this favored land
the sun is shining bright!
And somewhere bands are playing!
And somewhere hearts are light!
And somewhere men are laughing!
And somewhere children shout!
But there is no joy in Metville!
Mr. Met has struck out!

Oh, sure, blame the mascot!

The Yankees' Magic Number to win the AL East is 26 -- and the Baltimore Orioles, at this writing, are smacking the Tampa Bay Rays around, 8-2, so it will likely be down to 25. The Boston Red Sox lost the first game of a rain-forced doubleheader today, and are tied in the nightcap. Their Tragic Number to be eliminated from the AL Wild Card race is down to 21. The Mets' Tragic Number to be eliminated from the NL Wild Card race is down to 16.

*

I was in Philadelphia last night, finally completing my circuit of all 3 local ballparks, having gotten to both Yankee Stadium II and Citi Field in May. The Phillies had a 7:05 start against the Milwaukee Brewers, who I hadn't seen live since I was actually in Milwaukee in 1999, to see County Stadium before it closed.

Citizens Bank Park is right across from Lincoln Financial Field, home to both the Eagles and Temple University, which was playing "crosstown" rival Villanova in a 5:00 start. While a big rivalry in basketball, in football it's 2 teams that, not that long ago, were Division I-AA. They're trying to build it up by making it a "trophy rivalry," awarding the Mayor's Cup to the winner. (The rest of the Big 5 are Penn, which is in the Ivy League and therefore still I-AA; LaSalle, which in 2007 canceled its football program for the 2nd time; and St. Joseph's, which also doesn't have a football team.)

They had a wild-and-woolly game last season, and if I had already been to a Phils' home game this year, I might've taken that one in instead. I would've gotten my money's worth, as it was a back-and-forth affair that ended 25-24 to Temple, on Brandon McManus' 43-yard field goal with 3 seconds left. A crowd of 32,193 was at the 68,532-seat Linc.

Instead, I saw Cole Hamels do some serious dealing. He took a no-hitter into the 5th, but this game was very frustrating. The Phils scored on a groundout in the 2nd, and that was it, including a bases-loaded-nobody-out failure to score in the 5th. Jose Contreras lives: He pitched a scoreless 8th. Ryan Madson went 3-up-3-down in the 9th, and the Phils won, 1-0. The Phils got just 4 hits, the Brewers 3.

One of the Brewers' coaches is former Yankee second baseman and third-base coach, and former Met manager, Willie Randolph. Could he be the next Brewer manager? He might do better in Milwaukee than he did in Flushing. Then again, he won't have Omar Minaya as his general manager, bringing a team that's half-overrated and half-terminally sucky.

A crowd of 44,570 filled Citizens Bank Park, which is still my favorite of the post-Camden Yards "new" ballparks. The views are still great. The food is still great. The fans, contrary to Philadelphians when they watch pro football and hockey, usually show passion but keep their venom to themselves.

The only time the big Liberty Bell rang and lit up was for the win, and the late Harry Kalas' version of "High Hopes" was played. It was always a silly song, not worthy of its most famous performer, Frank Sinatra (even if he did rejigger the words for John F. Kennedy's 1960 campaign). It's no "Theme From 'New York, New York,'" like at Yankee Stadium (also a Sinatra song), or even "New York State of Mind," the Mets using Billy Joel's song even though BJ is a Yankee Fan. Still, it's a better send-the-fans-home song than "Dirty Water" in Boston.

Now, where's that rubber tree plant I had in the corner of the room?

Downfall of the Mets

I was listening to WFAN this afternoon, and Mike Francesca said that, based on the calls the station had taken from upset Met fans, the atmosphere at Citi Field and elsewhere in Met County (as opposed to Red Sox Nation or Yankees Universe) has gotten very, very bad. Francesca seems to think that, if the Mets lose 2 of 3 to the Washington Nationals this weekend, it could be a terribly long season.

It's getting so bad, even the Germans aren't happy with the Mets and their, uh, Downfall.

Those videos never get old!

Who Is Untouchable?; Fred Cusick, 1918-2009

Yesterday, I was watching the simulcast of Mike Francesa's now-Dogless WFAN radio show on YES, and he took a call about Brett Favre. The caller said that Favre is, and has been for a long time, incredibly overrated, and that the media has given him more passes than he's thrown.

Francesa agreed. How could he not? Even last year, as Favre signed with the J-E-T-S-Jets-Jets-Jets, the word "mancrush" was being used to describe the way certain sports pundits spoke of Favre, from Terry Bradshaw on Fox NFL Sunday (and, as a quarterback who led his team to not one but four Super Bowls, Terry should know better) to Tony Kornheiser on ESPN's Pardon the Interruption.

Of course, the term "mancrush" is, like, so 2008. The 2009 word is "bromance." In this case, the 2008 version is better.

People tend to slobber over Favre, no matter what he does wrong. You know why? Because he is untouchable.

Once a guy becomes untouchable -- and I don't mean in the Indian sense, or in the Robert Stack sense, either -- anybody who questions him, let alone criticizes him, gets ripped by his bromancers.

Take my post about my all-time most hated sports managers/head coaches/executives. Who did I put at Number 1? Joe Paterno. Ol' Ratface. If we're talking peak performance, he's earned a high place on the list. If we're talking cumulative "achievement," then he's an easy Number 1. And a bunch of Slap-Happy Valley boys came on here and ripped me for it. Naturally, because I have the truth on my side, I ripped back. The dopes.

Using the word "dope" makes me think of "rope-a-dope," which makes me think of Muhammad Ali. Has any performer in the history of sports ever gone from being so intensely hated, as Ali was when he refused to be drafted in 1967, to being nearly universally respected and even loved, as Ali was when he knocked out George Foreman in 1974 -- by which point only fools and warmongers (often the same) still thought the U.S. role in Vietnam was right?

Actually, yes, there is. Or, rather, there was. Ted Williams. He, too, was seen in 1942 as someone who was refusing to serve. The Pentagon was willing to back him up on it, since he was the sole support of his mother. But the criticism got so nasty that he enlisted in 1943, anyway, and eventually served in both World War II and the Korean War, nearly dying in the latter.

The Boston media never seemed to give Ted a break, and it poisoned a lot of fans toward him. At no time during his playing career was Ted as loved in New England as was Carl Yastrzemski in 1967, and again (after a few disappointing years when those ungrateful Chowdaheads decided to forget and started booing him again) from 1975 onward.

Case in point, examine their final games: Yaz's farewell was on October 2, 1983, a beautiful Sunday afternoon, and he was able to take a victory lap around a packed Fenway Park, shaking hands despite his desire for privacy that was reminiscent of Joe DiMaggio.

Ted's farewell was in front of barely 10,000 fans. There was a reason for it: September 28, 1960 a Wednesday afternoon game, and Ted described the weather as, "Lousy day, damp." Not good for a hitter, but he still managed to crank one to deep right-center for a home run in his final at-bat.

 The people who did show up cheered Ted wildly, but he wouldn't tip his cap. I understand. He waited until a ceremony in his honor in 1991 to tip his cap at Fenway.

And what of DiMaggio? He was criticized for not enlisting in 1942, but he had a wife and young son to support. But in 1943, his first wife, Dorothy Arnold -- a blonde actress, as was his second wife -- divorced him. So Joe enlisted. 

After his 1949 comeback, Joe became untouchable. Stories about him consorting with reputed Mob figures? Stories about him hurting his second wife? Stories about him speaking ill of the Kennedys? (You talk about "untouchable.") Stories about him speaking well of that bastard Henry Kissinger? And stories about him and his successor, Mickey Mantle, not getting along? All brushed aside, because he was the Yankee Clipper, Joltin' Joe DiMaggio. He was "The Greatest Living Baseball Player." He was untouchable.

And yet, after his death in 1999, it was as if no one needed to be afraid him anymore. In the last 10 years, his reputation has taken a pounding. All the stories people were afraid to tell, true or not, came out. 

Including, as seen in Billy Crystal's film 61*, the conflict between Joe and Mickey: Joe was dismissive of Mickey's ability and carousing -- as if Joe didn't like the nightlife, and blonde actresses, himself -- and Mickey, as the one who came after, never dared say anything, because it was Joe DiMaggio.

And what about Mickey? His career began at the height of the Korean War. How could someone so strong, so fast, and so between the ages of 18 and 25 not be drafted to serve in that war? Williams' Marine Corps Reserve unit was called into service, and Ted was 33 when that happened.

Willie Mays served in the Army in Korea. So did Mickey's teammates Whitey Ford, Billy Martin and Jerry Coleman -- and Coleman had also served in World War II, as a pilot, just like Williams. The Brooklyn Dodgers may well have lost the 1952 and 1953 World Series because their ace pitcher, Don Newcombe, was also in the Army.

So why didn't Mickey get drafted? Osteomyelitis, a bone infection, in his ankle. It would have killed him at age 15 if his parents hadn't driven through the night to get him to a hospital in Oklahoma City, where he could get penicillin, newly available to the general public. It was cured, but it still made him 4-F. Somebody (probably some twat like Dick Young) said, "So? He won't have to kick anybody!" (How did the twat know? Only those who've been in combat know for sure. I certainly don't.)

Mickey got booed because of it. Totally shredded. He hadn't done anything wrong. He didn't ask to get osteomyelitis. He didn't ask for any kind of deferment, medical or otherwise. If his continued presence in the Yankee lineup was okay with Yankee management, with manager Casey Stengel, and with the United States Department of Defense, why couldn't it be okay with Yankee Fans?

Maybe, just maybe, they still missed DiMaggio and wanted him back.

Crystal's film 61* may have spelled it out: At the expense of teammate Roger Maris, Mickey began to be cheered greater than he'd ever been cheered before, and was never booed again. As the fictional sportswriter played in the film by Richard Masur said, "That's because he's never been the underdog before."

Suddenly, Mickey's injuries, the first of which had kept him out of combat, made him less a malingerer, a goldbrick and a draft-dodger than a courageous fighter.

Dealing with the New York press, and sometimes with the New York fans, was his battle. He said it many times himself: "Playing ball was the easy part." (Sure it is... if you have Mickey Mantle's talent.) For him, the hard part was dealing with the reaction to it.

As Mike Schmidt put it a generation later, "The thrill of victory, and the agony of reading about it in the paper the next day." DiMaggio certainly understood that, as did Williams.

When Mickey retired, he was treated as a great hero. And a year later, former teammate Jim Bouton came out with his book Ball Four, and talked about Mickey drinking too much, and that it might have affected his play, and also about Mickey pushing autograph-seeing kids away, and sneaking peeks at women -- known at the time as "beaver-shooting."

To his credit, while Bouton quoted several players in that book joking about fooling around on the road, he never mentioned any wife-cheaters by name.

It didn't matter: Bouton was clobbered in the press, worse than he'd ever been by any opposing team's lineup. By 1989, in a 20th Anniversary update for the book, he was guessing that the reason he'd never been invited back to Yankee Stadium for Old-Timers' Day was that he'd exposed Mantle. He wasn't sure if it was Mickey demanding not to have to share a foul line with Bouton, or Yankee management not wanting to put Mickey in that potentially awkward position, but he did provide that speculation.

After Mickey got out of the Betty Ford Center in 1994, he decided he had to make amends with several people. He knew about Bouton's speculation, and called him. Bouton wasn't home, but Mickey left a message on the answering machine, saying that he never asked anyone not to invite Bouton to Old-Timers' Day. It was too late for Mickey, as his drinking had already weakened his liver to the point where it was struck by cancer, and he died in 1995.

But it wasn't until 1998, after the death of Jim's daughter Laurie and a plea in an open letter to The New York Times from his son Michael, that Jim was finally invited back, and he even pitched in a couple of Old-Timers' Games.

Still, a lot of the people he criticized in Ball Four (or who thought Jim had criticized them too harshly) weren't there anymore. Mickey, Roger Maris and Elston Howard were dead, and Ralph Houk had stopped coming due to advancing age. (Houk is still alive, and turns 90 this year.) Joe Pepitone didn't come off well in the book, and wasn't kind to Jim when he was interviewed by Peter Golenbock for his memoir Dynasty, but he didn't seem to mind sharing an Old-Timers' Day foul line with Jim.

Compared to some later tell-all books, Ball Four seems tame by comparison, especially when you consider some of the drunken escapades Mickey mentioned in his, and Whitey Ford's memoir Slick in which he spoke of ways of cheating that even Gaylord Perry (never mind Jose Canseco and Barry Bonds) ever thought of. And Pepitone's Joe, You Coulda Made Us Proud made Ball Four look like a Dr. Seuss book. It's as if, once Mickey started telling stories on himself, it became okay for us mere mortals do it.

Don Imus had a classic line: "If you go to Mickey Mantle's Restaurant after 2 in the morning, your meal is free if you can guess which table Mickey's under." Yeah, right, Imus. As if you haven't had your own substance abuse problems. At least no one's ever brought forward evidence of Mickey being a bigot.

Although Mickey sort of gave us the green light to talk about his failings, he's still untouchable. Remember the Seinfeld episode where Teri Hatcher (who, at age 44, is still real and still spectacular) played one of Jerry's girlfriends? Elaine tells Jerry, "They're fake." Jerry says, "You don't tell a guy something like that! It's like finding out Mickey Mantle corked his bat!" Remember, though, Elaine was from Towson, Maryland, just outside Baltimore, and was an Orioles fan.

Speaking of the Orioles, Cal Ripken remains untouchable. A week ago, I mentioned the Yanks-O's game I saw at Camden Yards on September 11, 2004. There were a lot of Yankee Fans there, but just about everybody in the section I sat in was an Oriole fan, and I said, "It's a very nice ballpark. I'm just glad you got that statue of Cal Ripken off the field."

The fan to my left got the joke: Cal was so slow by the end that he might as well have been a statue. He did not appreciate the joke. Fortunately, this was Camden Yards, not Fenway Park, and I got away with it, with my only punishment being that he said I shouldn't make jokes about Cal. I chose not to press my luck any further, since I'd already made my point (Cal should have retired earlier than he did) and he'd already made his (Cal is untouchable).

Even if the only significant truth about Ripken that no one would be willing to admit is that his streak hurt the team (and not, as the very quiet thus far rumor goes, that he used s------s), his acolytes can't handle the truth.

Of course, Pete Rose used to be one of those, didn't he? So did Mark McGwire. We still don't know the truth about McGwire, but he's been touched. The truth about Rose sure came out.

And his reputation is almost totally different since. As has been remarked elsewhere, the things that people liked about him before (or liked about him when he played for their team) have become the very things people hated about him afterward (or hated about him when he played against their team).

Crashing into Ray Fosse to win the 1970 All-Star Game? Before 1989: It was a sign of a great player always willing to hustle, willing to do what it takes to win. Since 1989: It was a vicious act by a self-absorbed bully.

Getting his 5-foot-11, 200-pound self into a fight with 5-foot-11, 160-pound Bud Harrelson in the 1973 NLCS? Before 1989: Pete just got carried away, got a little excited in the heat of the moment. After 1989: Pete was a thug and a bully, and should have been suspended for the rest of the season. (He wasn't suspended at all: In fact, the fight happened in Game 3, and his 10th-inning homer won Game 4 before the Mets beat the Reds in Game 5 to win the Pennant.)

His quest to break the all-time hits record of Ty Cobb? Before 1989: It was a sign of dogged determination and consistent excellence. Since 1989: It hurt the Reds, because he wasn't the hitter he once was; and since the Reds finished 2nd in 1985, maybe they would have won the National League West if manager Rose had realized that player Rose was washed up and had put a better player in there.

His running down to first base after drawing a walk? And his head-first slides? Before 1989: They were signs of enthusiasm and hustling. Since 1989: They made him a hot dog.

His feat of starting the All-Star Game at five different positions? Before 1989: It was a sign of versatility. Since 1989: It meant he couldn't field any of those positions well enough, and that, being unwilling to leave the NL, he was never going to play the "position" for which he was best suited, designated hitter.

For a generation, my generation, who didn't have a Mantle or a Mays, a DiMaggio or a Williams, a Ruth or a Cobb, who had to "settle" for a Jackson or a Schmidt as our generation's greatest player, Pete Rose was the symbol of baseball as much as anyone else was.

Pete Rose? Disgrace the game? Surely you can't be serious! They were serious... and don't call me "Shirley," but call Pete a disgrace. He was as untouchable as they come, but he got touched. No one is above the law, and no one is bigger than the game.

No one except Babe Ruth and Jackie Robinson. They may be the only two true untouchables left in baseball.

There may be one other: Bob Feller. Perhaps the greatest pitcher of his era, and a Navy combat veteran of World War II. He has become the face and voice of "The Greatest Generation" among athletes. So when he says something controversial (and he's said a few such things), he gets away with it because he's "Lieutenant Bob Feller, USN," and that's something bigger than "Hall-of-Famer Bob Feller" -- and don't doubt that for an instant.

I actually met him once, when he made a personal appearance at Trenton's Waterfront Park in 1994, and he was very gracious with these fans who'd never seen him play, so I won't speak ill of him.

The war that Muhammad Ali faced was not the noble struggle that Feller, Ted and Joe D. faced, or even the one Mickey faced. Still, there are people who see Ali in the news, as he still occasionally is, and write nasty letters to newspapers, calling him a "draft-dodger."

These, naturally, are people who twice voted for Ronald Reagan, who served in World War II but said service meant that he never had to leave Southern California; and twice voted for George W. Bush, who avoided combat and then avoided served for an entire year (5/1/72-4/30/73), and also for Bush's Vice President, Deferment Dick "I had other priorities" Cheney.

People who hate the Yankees -- and even a few people who love them, such as "Subway Squawkers" co-writer Lisa Swan -- have lamented the "untouchable" status of Derek Jeter, especially compared to the "completely touchable" Alex Rodriguez, and also the untouchability of former Yankee manager Joe Torre.

I got mad at Torre plenty of times, particularly when he brought Scott Proctor in to pitch. And Kyle (Not a) Farnsworth. In fact, I'm getting steamed just thinking about those two! So let's move on.

The point is, some people only remember the Torre of 2002 to 2007 -- or even 2004 to 2007, if Aaron Boone cancels out Jeff Weaver for you and you still think more of the glory of 2003 than the way it ended. But what Joe did from 1996 to 2001 (or 1996 to 2003) cannot be ignored.

Still, lots of people not only want to forget 1996-2001, but when they bring up 2002-2007, they like to add on 1977-1995, when Torre was an underachiever as a manager. Not really, he just didn't have the horses. The guy managed the Atlanta Braves to a Division Title. That may not seem like a big deal now, but between 1969 and 1991, he was the only Braves manager to do it. In fact, he was the only Braves manager in that stretch to even get them into a Pennant race.

Is Derek Jeter untouchable? Not even in his own metro area. There are lots of Met fans who still want to give Jose Reyes -- in the event they can still find him -- the benefit of the doubt and say that Reyes is the better shortstop. These people were once delusional enough to think that Rey Ordonez was the better shortstop.

And lots of people have demanded that Jeter drop his "selfishness" and let Alex Rodriguez, "the better shortstop," take the position. Let Jeter play third base, or first, or the outfield. This season in particular, these people look like morons, even if they don't wear blue and orange -- or seem to, like Mike Lupica of the Daily News often does.

I do understand. When Jeter was first a regular in 1996, he was a 21-year-old heartthrob, and the media and the fans couldn't get enough of him. But I wasn't one of the Jeter groupies. I thought Bernie Williams was The Next Great Yankee, the one to follow in the progression of Ruth, Gehrig, DiMaggio, Mantle, Jackson, Winfield, Mattingly, (fill in the blank).

It bothered me that the general public hadn't selected the game Next Great Yankee that I had. I loved Bernie like a brother. I still do. Until the day he was, not by his own choice, forced out in 2006, he was my favorite active Yankee. And I was so pleased when he turned out to be the last former Yankee to take the field at the closing ceremony for the old Stadium last year. (My God, it's already been almost exactly one year. Bernie is an Old-Timer. Where does the time go?)

As it turned out, Bernie may have been the best all-around player on the Yankees from 1996 through 1999, and he will get his Number 51 retired and a Plaque in the new Stadium's Monument Park someday, but it is Jeter who is the central figure of the 1996-present era of Yankees. 

Bernie, Paul O'Neill, Tino Martinez, Andy Pettitte, Jorge Posada, even Mariano Rivera, and of course Joe Torre, all will die eventually. But only Jeter will go from Plaque to Monument upon his passing, as DiMaggio and Mantle did. (Ruth and Gehrig, of course, never got Plaques during their lifetimes, and got the Monuments shortly after their deaths.)

But Derek Jeter is not "untouchable." And you know what? I'm fine with that. As the old Roman saying goes, "Let them hate, as long as they fear."

After all, look at some of the untouchables. Roger Staubach? A Dallas Cowboy, and therefore a hypocrite, or at least an enabler. Bill Parcells? Moves around almost as much as Larry Brown (who was never quite untouchable), and never won anything without Bill Belichick, therefore we have to wonder if even the Tuna's achievements are suspect. 

Michael Jordan? He was never the greatest ever, and his poor management of basketball teams, as well as his marital failings, show he wasn't what they said he was.

Wayne Gretzky? Sided with the NHL owners, of which he'd become one, in 2004 and betrayed his former fellow players, becoming a traitor to the game that had made him fabulously wealthy and world-famous. Mark Messier? We Devils fans know the truth about this classless thug.

Greg Schiano? What if he turns out to be the man who got Rutgers this far, but couldn't get them any farther? What if we need to find someone else to take the last couple of steps? It's an unappetizing prospect, but it must be considered.

I don't like the idea of making athletes "untouchable." And I certainly don't want to be untouchable myself. Not that I have to worry about that. You don't have to revere me.

But it wouldn't hurt you to agree with me 99 percent of the time.

*

Fred Cusick has died at age 90. A native of Boston, he played hockey at the city's Northeastern University, commanded a U.S. Navy subchaser (chasing submarines) in World War II, and went into radio. From 1952 to 1963, he broadcast for his hometown Bruins on WEEI radio. In 1957, working for CBS, he broadcast the 1st NHL game on U.S. television. Unlike Foster Hewitt of the Toronto Maple Leafs and the CBC, who coined the legendary, "He shoots, he scores!" Cusick would simply say, "Score!" and then give the scorer's name.

On September 9, 1960, he broadcast the 1st American Football League game from Boston University's Nickerson Field: Denver Broncos 13, Boston Patriots 10. He continued to broadcast for the Patriots until 1964, including their 1963 AFL Championship Game loss to the San Diego Chargers.

From 1969 to 1997, he broadcast for the Bruins again, first on WSBK-Channel 38, and then on New England Sports Network (NESN). When the Bruins won the Stanley Cup in 1970, for the 1st time in 29 years, Cusick had the call of Bobby Orr's goal, perhaps the most famous ever scored in an NHL game: "Bobby Orr, behind the net, to Sanderson, to -- Score! Bobby Orr scores for the Boston Bruins, and won the Stanley Cup!"

In 1984, when the Hockey Hall of Fame instituted its award for broadcasters, named for Hewitt, the 1st inductees were Hewitt himself, Montreal Canadiens' English broadcaster Danny Gallivan, Canadiens' French broadcaster Rene Lecavalier, and Cusick. All well deserved.

Cusick retired to Cape Cod, and until 2007 broadcast games in the Cape Cod League, a summer amateur league for college-age baseball players. He died at his home in Barnstable, on the Cape.

UPDATE: Cusick was buried nearby, at Mosswood Cemetery in Cotuit.

Mike & the Mad Dog: 1989-2008

So, Christopher (Mad Dog) Russo has left WFAN, New York's all-sports station at 660 AM, leaving Michael Francesa to turn Mike and the Mad Dog into Francesa on the 'FAN.

This is a big mistake. They're so much better together than apart. You see, Mike, when alone, talksinalowrumblingmonotone, andnobodycanstanditforlong, byhimself, he'sreallyreallyboring.

And when Chris is by himself and he doesn't have Mike to slam on his brakes, do ya know what happens? DO YA KNOW WHAT HAPPENS? I'll tell ya what happens! Dog goes outta control! He starts screaming like a lunatic! And his Yankee hatred spirals up to da moon! And he gets to da point where da guys at WIP in Philly can hear him! Without turning on their radios! I'll bet even those goofballs up at WEEI in Bahston can hear him!

(Sometimes there's a 7-second pause of dead air... )

And when he catches his breath he GETS BACK ON DA HIGH HORSE AND HE CAN'T BE STOPPED! I'D LIKE SOMEBODY TO STOP HIM! JUST ONE TIME! ONE TIME! ONE TIME! ONE TIME!!!!

Plus, he talks about tennis way too much. It's a major league sports in only 8 weeks of the year, and, even then, most Americans don't pay attention except for Wimbledon and the U.S. Open. And then, just from the Quarterfinals on. So, 2 weeks of the year. Face it, if Roger Federer and Rafael Nadal had played that incredible Final in Melbourne (in the Australian Open) instead of London, it would still have been a major, and it still would've been great, but would we be talking much about it?

And they both talk about golf too much. There's no reason to talk about golf on a sports station, because golf is not a sport.

Then again, neither was The Sopranos, which they both talked about way too much. Though watching that show appeared to involve some athleticism, to hear them talk about it.

Well, you know the old saying. Mike & the Mad Dog were an institution... but who wants to live in an institution?

Mike and the Mad Dog. Requiescat in pace, September 5, 1989 - August 5, 2008.

So long, "Kathie Lee." Hey, "Regis," get somebody good to take his place.

Of course, you know me: I can do a show all by myself, titled, Mike IS the Mad Dog.