Thursday, April 17, 2008

Winning Ugly Is Still Winning

Yankees 15, Red Sox 9. Another slugfest between the Bronx Bombers and the New England Idiots. (Hey, that's what they called themselves in 2004: "The Idiots." I report. You decide.)

I saw some of that game at Bubba Gump restaurant on Times Square. Four screens at the bar. One showing "Forrest Gump" -- while I was there, focusing on the Yankees' 1965 to 1975 dark age. Then there were the Mets, the Red Sox and the New York Rangers, the 3 sports teams I hate the most -- the order often depending on who's the most in the way at the time, and whose fans are being the most obnoxious. Didn't stop me from eating, though.

I wasn't happy about Chien-Ming Wang's Sinker of Doom not working. But it's gotta frustrate the Chowdaheads that their boys got 9 runs off the Yankees in our house -- and lost by a touchdown! (OK, we missed the extra point.)

A-Rod hit Number 522. Only 241 more to go. Passing Ted Williams and Willie McCovey, however, doesn't make him the greater legend. Then again, they never won a World Series, either -- but at least each won a Pennant, something A-Rod hasn't yet done.

LaTroy Hawkins switched to Number 22, and pitched very well. Giving up Number 21 was the right thing to do. Whatever the virtues of Roberto Clemente, in the New York Tri-State Area, Number 21 means Paul O'Neill. (Unless you think it means Cleon Jones.)

My grandmother, a Queens native who went from rooting for the Dodgers to rooting for the Mets, liked to say, "It's not how good you are when you're good, it's how good you are when you're bad."  In other words, if you can play badly and still find a way to win, you're going to be all right.

To put it another way: This ain't figure skating. There are no style points. Your home run still counts for as many runs as it drives in, no matter how you wear your uniform or your hair. (Lucky for the Sox.) And you don't get half a point added to your ERA if the music playing when you come in from the bullpen is bad. It's all about can you score more runs than the other team? If you do, that's all. "Winning ugly" is still winning.

I really hate the Rangers. I hate the Texas baseball team and that Glasgow soccer club just because of the New York hockey team. Talk about winning ugly. And that's just Jaromir Jagr and Sean Avery, soon to star in the video "2 Girls, No Cup!"

The Devils better win tomorrow night: Not just to stay alive, and push this awful series to a Game 6, but we cannot let those bastards clinch in our house! We must defend the Rock!

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