Yanks Can't Hit Bibens-Dirkx, Girardi & Clippard Are Jerkx

Luis Cessa, honoring his manager, Joe Girardi,

by wearing Girardi's IQ as his uniform number

Me, Friday afternoon: "Austin Bibens-Dirkx. He's a 32-year-old righthander from Oregon, who just last month made his major league debut, in his 12th season in the minors. A fine example of persistence, sure. But the proverbial 'pitcher the Yankees have never seen before.' And the game is on Fox. So you know what that combination means. It means the execrable Joe Buck will enjoy himself, and let us know it."

Unfortunately, I called it. How I wish I had been wrong. Here is what the Yankees got against the Texas Rangers yesterday afternoon at Yankee Stadium:

* 1st inning: Mason Williams walked to lead off the game, and stole 2nd base. Stranded.

* 2nd inning: Starlin Castro led off with a single. Stranded.

* 3rd inning: Williams singled with 1 out. Stranded.

* 5th inning: Austin Romine singled with 2 out. Stranded.

* 6th inning: Aaron Judge crushed a 439-foot home run to left-center field, his 26th and most meaningless dinger of the season.

* 7th inning: Didi Gregorius led off with a single. Erased on a double play.

That's what they got against ABD. They didn't get anything off Alex Claudio in the 8th or Keone Kela in the 9th, either.

On the Yankee side, Luis Cessa allowed 3 runs on 3 hits and 2 walks in 5 innings. He struck out 8, but who cares?

Still, it was only 4-1 Rangers going into the 9th. A comeback was still possible.

But because Joe Girardi is an idiot who doesn't know how to manage a bullpen, he put Tyler Clippard in to pitch the 9th inning. By the time Clippard finally got the last out of the inning, his earned run average had soared to 4.85 on the season.

He's a relief pitcher.

Deservedly, he got booed off the mound.

Rangers 8, Yankees 1. WP: Bibens-Dirkx (3-0). No save. LP: Cessa (0-2).

The Red Sox also lost, so the Yankees remain tied for 1st, a game ahead in the loss column.

Today is Old-Timers' Day. Ceremonies get underway at 12:00. The regular game is scheduled to start at 2:10. Michael Pineda starts against Nick Martinez.

I'm really hoping the Yankees don't embarrass their legends, as they have so many times before.

Because that's depressing.