Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Angels' Wings Clipped, Bring On the Red Scum

The Yankees clinched a Playoff spot, reduced their Magic Number over the Red Sox to 5, and took 2 out of 3 against the Los Angeles Angels of 2000 Gene Autry Way, Anaheim, Orange County, California, United States of America, North America, Western Hemisphere, Planet Earth, Sol System, Milky Way Galaxy, Known Universe.

Am I getting snippy about the Angels? My team just beat them 2 out of 3 in Anaheim, so they can take my snippiness and shove it under their halos.

Ian Kennedy, so maligned and then hurt last season, and out most of this season with an aneurysm, pitched out of a jam in the 8th. Nice.

A.J. Burnett pitched against a quality team without going up in smoke. Even better.

Next up: The Boston Red Scum, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. They play in Kansas City tonight and tomorrow night, so going into Friday night, the Yanks' Magic Number will be 5, 4 or 3. The Division can be clinched this weekend. Wouldn't it be sweet to clinch it against The Scum? Bring 'em on.

But the Sox will almost certainly win the Wild Card, so there may be an ALCS matchup against them for the Pennant, for full revenge.

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Curt Schilling announced that he's not running for Ted Kennedy's Senate seat.

Good, it's a little soon for Ted to start turning over in his grave.

Crybaby Curt said his wife wasn't thrilled with the idea. Way to be conservative, Curt. Let the woman dominate you.

I got a better idea: Come out of retirement, and let the Yankees dominate you.

Pathetic punk.

*

The Miami Dolphins held the ball for 45 minutes against the Indianapolis Colts on Monday night, and still lost. Bill Parcells would turn over in his grave... except he's still alive. In fact, he's the boss of the Dolphins, and I'm guessing the Tuna is pretty steamed right now.

*

The Los Angeles Sparks will be playing their home games in the WNBA Western Conference Finals at UCLA's Pauley Pavilion. Nothing wrong with wanting to play at one of the greatest facilities in the history of basketball, even if it is college, not pro.

But the reason they got bumped from the Staples Center was... a Britney Spears concert.

Let's see: Lisa Leslie, Tina Thompson and Candace Parker, or... Britney Spears.

And the WNBA let itself be bumped by her? Oops, they did it again.

The Eastern Conference Finals will be the defending champion Detroit Shock against the Indiana Fever.

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I'm not looking forward to Rutgers at Maryland on Saturday. Having a home game against Florida International not yet decided until the last minute of the game? In the words of the immoral Didier Drogba, "It's a disgrace! It's a disgrace! It's a fucking disgrace!"

*

Days until East Brunswick plays football again: 2. Having won their first two games, against supposedly good teams in Woodbridge and Freehold Township, both on the road, by a combined 72-6, Da Bears have their home opener, against Monroe, which had never made the Playoffs before starting a streak of three straight seasons doing so. They're going for four, and they're going to be really up for this one. Despite this almost certainly being the Home News Tribune’s Game of the Week, I’ll have to bring my headphones that night, because on the same night…

Days until the final Yankees-Red Sox series of the 2009 regular season: 2, this Friday, at Yankee Stadium II.

Days until Rutgers plays football again: 3.

Days until the Devils play hockey again: 10, against the hated Philadelphia Flyers. A week and a half. And the Devils cut their ticket prices! The $65 south-end seats I usually got last season are now only $56! Yay, home team!

Days until the Devils play another local rival: 12, against the truly deeply despised New York Rangers. Maybe I am ready for hockey: I’ve already ordered my tickets to this one. RANGERS SUCK!

Days until the next East Brunswick-Old Bridge Thanksgiving clash: 65. I hate the Purple Bastards. I really, really, really hate 'em. More than I hate the Flyers. More than I hate Penn State. More than I hate the Mets, Red Sox or Rangers? Uh, let me get back to you on that...

Days until the 2010 Winter Olympics begin: 142.

Days until the 2010 World Cup begins: 262.

Days until the World Cup Final: 293.

Days until Derek Jeter collects his 3,000th career hit: 598 (projected).

Days until the Rutgers-Army football game at Yankee Stadium: 780.

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